Abrahamic Religions: Polygamy- yes or no?

[Tranquil Servant]

From a religious point of view.....Polygamy - yes or no? And why? Scriptural proof preferred.
(Women especially!!)

 

[Rival]

I don't want to mainstream it, but I don't think it should be banned either. Let people have whichever lifestyle works for them/they can afford. The Tanakh assumes that a man can have more than one wife and makes allowances for this.

Also I'm a girl.

 

[whirlingmerc]

Polygamy - yes or no? And why?

God originally said 'the two shall be one"

There are allot of things in the Bible where a less good choice is restrained by rules.
There are no happy cases of polygamous marriages in the Bible.

In the New Testament some would allow a person with multiple wives before becoming a Christian might continue. However after being a believer one man one woman is the rule.

More than that marriage today points forward to something greater and eternal
a relationship between Christ and the church

I can only speak for a Christian view and to an extent a Jewish view.

 

[Firemorphic]

I have literally no opinion on it myself but I am curious why many non-religious people see such an idea so bad or damning - considering that things like swinging and orgies aren't that uncommon among atheists etc (and those things are just temporary "pleasures", not commitments)

When it comes to polygamy, there would have to be a lot of true love and commitment involved for it to be worth it but I don't see much of a purpose in it, hence why it's not that popular anyway.

Consenting adults will always do as they please but one partner is far enough to worry and care about for me though.

 

[Rival]

However after being a believer one man one woman is the rule

I thought the Christian writings say that the Church elder is to be a 'man of one wife' not the whole church? What does your scripture say about this exactly?

 

[Rival]

I am assuming this thread is supposed to be about polygyny not polygamy.

 

[whirlingmerc]

I thought the Christian writings say that the Church elder is to be a 'man of one wife' not the whole church? What does your scripture say about this exactly?

Yes an elder or deacon should be 'the husband of one wife' in this life

Current physical marriage is 'a temporary parable of permanence' pointing to something greater where current marriage is a mere glimpse of 'the marriage supper of the lamb"

 

[Riders]

From a religious point of view.....Polygamy - yes or no? And why? Scriptural proof preferred.
(Women especially!!)

As a woman who use to be in a polyamorous relationship I say yes, mainstream it and make it not illegal. I think its fine, personally the difference between Polyamory and polygamy is the polygamists are married.

I know some say its sexist but honestly I would not mind being in a relationship with a polyamourus guy and while I stay true he could date other people. Why not? Its not sexist if I choose it. I may not have the energy to physically be fully sexual with someone why not let them go somewhere else?

 

[Riders]

I am assuming this thread is supposed to be about polygyny not polygamy.

Whats the difference?

 

[Skwim]

From a religious point of view.....Polygamy - yes or no? And why? Scriptural proof preferred.
(Women especially!!)

1 Chronicles 4:5
5 Ashhur the father of Tekoa had two wives, Helah and Naarah

2 Samuel 5:13
13 After he left Hebron, David took more concubines and wives in Jerusalem, and more sons and daughters were born to him.

2 Samuel 12:8
8 I gave your master’s house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you all Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more.

2 Chronicles 11:21
21 Rehoboam loved Maakah daughter of Absalom more than any of his other wives and concubines. In all, he had eighteen wives and sixty concubines, twenty-eight sons and sixty daughters.

2 Chronicles 13:21
21 But Abijah grew in strength. He married fourteen wives and had twenty-two sons and sixteen daughters.

Exodus 21:10
10 If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights.

Genesis 4:19
19 Lamech married two women, one named Adah and the other Zillah.

Genesis 30:9
9 When Leah saw that she had stopped having children, she took her servant Zilpah and gave her to Jacob as a wife.

Isaiah 4:1
1 In that day seven women will take hold of one man and say, “We will eat our own food and provide our own clothes; only let us be called by your name. Take away our disgrace!”

Judges 8:30
30 He had seventy sons of his own, for he had many wives.

1 Samuel 1:1-2
1 There was a certain man from Ramathaim, a Zuphite from the hill country of Ephraim, whose name was Elkanah son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephraimite. 2 He had two wives; one was called Hannah and the other Peninnah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah had none.

Deuteronomy 21:15-17
15 If a man has two wives, and he loves one but not the other, and both bear him sons but the firstborn is the son of the wife he does not love, 16 when he wills his property to his sons, he must not give the rights of the firstborn to the son of the wife he loves in preference to his actual firstborn, the son of the wife he does not love. 17 He must acknowledge the son of his unloved wife as the firstborn by giving him a double share of all he has. That son is the first sign of his father’s strength. The right of the firstborn belongs to him.

2 Chronicles 24:1-3
1 Joash was seven years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem forty years. His mother’s name was Zibiah; she was from Beersheba. 2 Joash did what was right in the eyes of the LORD all the years of Jehoiada the priest. 3 Jehoiada chose two wives for him, and he had sons and daughters.

​

In as much as god made rules for polygamous relationships (see Deuteronomy 21:15-17 above) he no doubt approved of it.

I am assuming this thread is supposed to be about polygyny not polygamy.

Polygyny is a specific form of polygamy.

.

 

[Sundance]

As a Bahá’í, my faith’s laws are explicit in this matter: only monogamous relationships are permitted for us. As for others, I will not speak.

 

[Riders]

I have literally no opinion on it myself but I am curious why many non-religious people see such an idea so bad or damning - considering that things like swinging and orgies aren't that uncommon among atheists etc (and those things are just temporary "pleasures", not commitments)

When it comes to polygamy, there would have to be a lot of true love and commitment involved for it to be worth it but I don't see much of a purpose in it, hence why it's not that popular anyway.

Consenting adults will always do as they please but one partner is far enough to worry and care about for me though.

You forgot Polyamory as well, and many religious folks are involved in Polyamory and swinging too. Some Christians consider it not cheating to swing, because its something they do together at the same party not behind each others backs.

 

[Firemorphic]

You forgot Polyamory as well, and many religious folks are involved in Polyamory and swinging too. Some Christians consider it not cheating to swing, because its something they do together at the same party not behind each others backs.

I gotta say, that sounds incredibly strange.

 

[whirlingmerc]

1 Chronicles 4:5
5 Ashhur the father of Tekoa had two wives, Helah and Naarah

2 Samuel 5:13
13 After he left Hebron, David took more concubines and wives in Jerusalem, and more sons and daughters were born to him.

2 Samuel 12:8
8 I gave your master’s house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you all Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more.

2 Chronicles 11:21
21 Rehoboam loved Maakah daughter of Absalom more than any of his other wives and concubines. In all, he had eighteen wives and sixty concubines, twenty-eight sons and sixty daughters.

2 Chronicles 13:21
21 But Abijah grew in strength. He married fourteen wives and had twenty-two sons and sixteen daughters.

Exodus 21:10
10 If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights.

Genesis 4:19
19 Lamech married two women, one named Adah and the other Zillah.

Genesis 30:9
9 When Leah saw that she had stopped having children, she took her servant Zilpah and gave her to Jacob as a wife.

Isaiah 4:1
1 In that day seven women will take hold of one man and say, “We will eat our own food and provide our own clothes; only let us be called by your name. Take away our disgrace!”

Judges 8:30
30 He had seventy sons of his own, for he had many wives.

1 Samuel 1:1-2
1 There was a certain man from Ramathaim, a Zuphite from the hill country of Ephraim, whose name was Elkanah son of Jeroham, the son of Elihu, the son of Tohu, the son of Zuph, an Ephraimite. 2 He had two wives; one was called Hannah and the other Peninnah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah had none.

Deuteronomy 21:15-17
15 If a man has two wives, and he loves one but not the other, and both bear him sons but the firstborn is the son of the wife he does not love, 16 when he wills his property to his sons, he must not give the rights of the firstborn to the son of the wife he loves in preference to his actual firstborn, the son of the wife he does not love. 17 He must acknowledge the son of his unloved wife as the firstborn by giving him a double share of all he has. That son is the first sign of his father’s strength. The right of the firstborn belongs to him.

2 Chronicles 24:1-3
1 Joash was seven years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem forty years. His mother’s name was Zibiah; she was from Beersheba. 2 Joash did what was right in the eyes of the LORD all the years of Jehoiada the priest. 3 Jehoiada chose two wives for him, and he had sons and daughters.

​

In as much as god made rules for polygamous relationships (see Deuteronomy 21:15-17 above) he no doubt approved of it.



Polygyny is a specific form of polygamy.

.

as I pointed out, no polygamous marriage in the Bible was a happy one

 

[Riders]

I gotta say, that sounds incredibly strange.

Swingers don't go behind each others backs and have affairs, they have party's where they trade partners, that's why some people also call then wife swappers, they trade out while at the party for play time, they may have sex or do other sexual stuff, some just watch some may have oral sex but not intercourse depending on what they're willing to do.

Therefore because its not being done behind the backs they say its not an affair.

 

[Firemorphic]

Swingers don't go behind each others backs and have affairs, they have party's where they trade partners, that's why some people also call then wife swappers, they trade out while at the party for play time, they may have sex or do other sexual stuff, some just watch some may have oral sex but not intercourse depending on what they're willing to do.

Therefore because its not being done behind the backs they say its not an affair.

I do know what swingers are (I was the one who mentioned it) but whether it's consented to by the actual spouse or not, it's still adultery and fornication, which is what makes your mention of Christians in this context so strange.

 

[whirlingmerc]

Swingers don't go behind each others backs and have affairs, they have party's where they trade partners, that's why some people also call then wife swappers, they trade out while at the party for play time, they may have sex or do other sexual stuff, some just watch some may have oral sex but not intercourse depending on what they're willing to do.

Therefore because its not being done behind the backs they say its not an affair.

No Abrahamic religion I know of allows 'swinging'

My Hindu friends also see things as 'one man one woman' for life usually

I have a Muslim fried who explained to my Indian friends he can have 4 wives and
the Indian ladies gave him a serious look and a talking to. (in a friendly way)

None of them are 'swingers' either

 

[Rival]

Whats the difference?

Polygamy refers to a person having more than one marriage partner of any sex, whereas polygyny refers specifically to more than one wife.

 

[Firemorphic]

I have a Muslim fried who explained to my Indian friends he can have 4 wives

Not by default, as according to Islamic morality it's a conditional thing. There is a criteria to meet. A Muslim dude can't just go marrying lots of woman and expect his decision to be considered moral, ethical or respectful. In Islam it's only one man, one woman with exceptions which can allow up to 4 wives but only if it meets the criteria.

 

[whirlingmerc]

Not by default, as according to Islamic morality it's a conditional thing. There is a criteria to meet. A Muslim dude can't just go marrying lots of woman and expect his decision to be considered moral, ethical or respectful.

One would hope there are high codes of morality and ethics.
It's also for the protection of the woman as well not to be used and manipulated but
more of a partner and soul mates

As far as such poly-relationships the closest I would get is in eternity between Christ and the church and a marriage of a different sort anyhow

I take Song of Solomon and Psalm 45 as pointing toward The Marriage Supper of the Lamb