Alien First Impressions

[Quetzal]

Let's suppose that aliens stumble upon our little blue rock and observe us from afar. What would be some of their first impressions or thoughts? Here are a few I came up with...

"I don't quite understand their fascination and reverence of this cartoon mouse they call 'Mickey'."

"What is the big deal with these 'cat' creatures?"

"How is that Quetzal fella so much better looking than the rest?"

 

[Iti oj]

I would need to know more about the aliens

 

[Augustus]

Probably the same impressions we have when we go to a Safari Park.

 

[Sunstone]

"Why do they consistently select leaders who are going to sell them out?"

 

[beenherebeforeagain]

"Why do they poop in their nest so much? Don't they know that's unhealthy?"

 

[Sunstone]

"How is that Quetzal fella so much better looking than the rest?"

"Let's first abduct him, then anally probe him to find out!"

 

[Quetzal]

"What do you mean adults can't see cinnamon swirls in every bite!? Are they blind? There are right there!"

 

[Terese]

How do they get things done with only two hands? At LEAST four!

 

[Thief]

Kill them all......let God sort them out.

 

[Corthos]

"This one knows too much, and must be silenced..."

 

[DawudTalut]

....
"How is that Quetzal fella so much better looking than the rest?"

What if they say, 'let's take him with us'.

 

[Thief]

at first the aliens will not be concerned.
without Star Trek tech.....we are confined to this solar system

as soon as we get the right stuff......the aliens will do a....
the Day the Earth Stood Still.....scenario

 

[Revoltingest]

Aliens would necessarily be more technologically advanced just because they're mastered space travel.
But people falsely presume that they're also socially more advanced. This is wrong.
How do I know?
Aliens regularly beam telepathic messages directly in to my brain. They tell me things.
Here are some of their recent concerns.....
- Will Lady Edith reconcile with Bertie Pelham? She deserves to be happy with a husband who will accept Marigold. (They watch Downton Abbey on US TV, so they haven't seen the series finale which already aired in Englandistan.)
- The combover has become wildly popular on Omicron Perseii 8. They're anxious to probe this person we call "Trump", to see if he has other useful features.
- They want to learn more about this substance called "bacon". Watching youtube, they've discovered that it's a miracle cure for everything.
- They're fascinated by porn, & wonder if there might be a market on Earth for some of theirs.
- Rigel 8 has been suffering political bickering, & they were wondering if Rob Ford is available to rule them. They like his style, & feel he'd be a fantastic leadership upgrade for them.

 

[Quetzal]

Kill them all......let God sort them out.

I bet you are a blast at parties...

 

[Thief]

Aliens regularly beam telepathic messages directly in to my brain. They tell me things.

Here^is a another guy that knows too much......

 

[Thief]

I bet you are a blast at parties...

yeah .....my stand up kills them......
it just KILLS them!!!!!

 

[Revoltingest]

Here^is a another guy that knows too much......

This is the first time I've ever been accused of that.

 

[Thief]

there a first time for everything......
glad to pop your cherry....
your welcome

 

[YmirGF]

DINNER!!!

 

[Valjean]

Bunch of aggressive apes that never overcame their tribal psychology, but somehow acquired the technology to blow each other up and foul their own nest into a mass extinction.

Place your bets, gentlemen. Environmental collapse or nuclear annihilation?