Oh goodness that makes me remember, and I've probably shared this before, when I was riding in the car with my hubby one day. We were chillin until we came to a stop light. I got a sudden strong rush of overwhelming evil, for it went well beyond negativity. At first I couldn't zero in on where it was coming from until I spotted the car that had to be about two car-lengths in front of us to our right. Oh, the car itself exuded a personality of its own, like it had witnessed many things. The two people and the dog who occupied the car were one in the same. They all shared the same aura, the same evil, a feeling of dread swept over me and I began to cry. At the same time I sensed that other people were picking up on that but couldn't understand the source. I felt a growing wave of tension, fear, and uneasiness flowing from the people in their cars. Two other cars had dogs in them and the animals were among the first to react along with me. One dog began snarling and barkin furiously and the other began to whimper and cower. It was indeed the longest red light in the history of traffic lights, and I was eager to escape that car. I began to cry softly to myself as I was drawn to see the perspective of the driver of the "car". From his POV I saw my environment as I saw my own, but with an added "fogginess" to it. The presence of another POV was palpable and I wanted out of my line of sight immediately.
Well, I can also confirm for you that not only are you an excellent "receiver", but you are also a very strong "sender". I have no problem visualizing this event and briefly saw it from
your perspective. An interesting note: I do not perceive "evil" per se and though I DO KNOW what intensity you are talking about, I interpret the quality differently and couch it in psychological terms. Now: IF the person see's themselves AS "evil" and consciouly works towards that quality of being, I do sense what you are saying. There are indeed those alive who consciously explore the dark side of the psyche and I would be a bit foolish to deny it.
An interesting note is that I am in some terms quite "strong" and so I am not overwhelmed by such individuals. I know the last time this happened it was a glorious day and I worked in the downtown core. I was walking back from lunch and went through a crowd of people and as I walked I began to feel a sense of foreboding. You know how your legs feel in a dream if you are trying to run, lol. It was like that and then I saw him. He was nicely dressed but he seemed to have a "thunder cloud" about him. My stomach lurched and I felt I might be physically ill, but managed to regain my composure as my own E.D.S.S. field gave way to the more offensive side and part of me pushed back against it. I tried not to stare at the fellow, but I caught a look of surprise on his face. I got the impression that he had never felt that before. It's hard to describe it really as it is more of an automatic response. The only feeble way I can describe it is that I do not subscribe to the concept of evil and something inside me moved to "nullify" that storm cloud effect (this is perception and no way literal of course). All I know is that he felt something and I felt the recoil, like that of a scalded cat. THAT was neat. Hehe. I wasn't even late getting back from lunch.
Frankly folks are welcome to think we are both nutty as fruitcakes, but I don't know you from Eve and you don't know me from Adam and yet we understand well what the other has experienced(es). (Perhaps we both have the same, as of yet, unknown "illness", lol. (Just kidding.)
Insha Allah I will never forget that experience. I hate looking upon those types of people. I know for a fact that what people call "evil" exists in the world without doubt, and that I have not even scratched the surface of it and neither do I want to go any deeper.
Although I DO get the "heebie jeebies" from such people, I have come to think that we are around to nullify their effects. I agree with you however, as quite often when watching a News story I will comment, "I never want to understand how people can allow themselves to inflict so much harm on another person. I NEVER want to "get it" because I figger at that point, I'll be able to rationalize it to myself... and I just ain't "goin' there".
Well if I allowed myself to bond quickly I would. However I always employ my trusty E.D.S.S (emotional defense security systems). Basically it is a wall, guarded very vigilantly. I do encounter people who I would otherwise be drawn to immediately, but I keep that in check. From experience, it has not worked well for me to discard my instincts here.
How interesting. I knew it, lol. Life has taught me to be guarded with people. That is why I am on record as saying people must earn my trust and respect. When they have accomplished that there is very little they can do to have me withdraw my total loyalty and support. Get burned ten times and one tends to get a bit shy.
I have found that I often dislike or better yet, are leary of people for no apparent reason. These are people who outwardly display all the characteristics that are likeable but for some reason or another I cannot like them. I am ususally casually friendly with them and nothing more. Other people like them, but I can't do it and more often then not I find out later a character trait that would explain it.
Leary is a great way to put it, FVM. I know exactly what you mean. If it wasn't for this ability to "see through" people and their carefully crafted appearances, I would have a lot more friends. I cherish the ones I have, but simply have no need to "collect" new people. It is for this reason I also do not like being in hospitals and around "sick" people... as well... I intensely dislike visiting apartment buildings because there is just too much energy flying about with paper thin walls between neighbours. Office towers generally do not bother me. Go figger.
Nice to talk to someone who understands a part of my nature.
