Compared to Abrahamic/Abrahamic-inspired traditions or relatively popular Eastern traditions there is a stronger than typical sense of self/individuality, willpower, self-determination and belief in boastful pride, glory, strength, etc. - that can overshadow the importance of family and community for some.
Heathenry takes more work, for sure. It's a balance between individuality, self-sufficiency, and concern for the community/tribe. As Spock said
"The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one". But the individual still needs to be considered. I read a nice tidbit elsewhere that goes
"...There are several historical precedents that what we consider generosity today, particularly that of giving to the poor, was a common practice. This may be part of what we call "the social contract" and behavior that gives people a warm fuzzy but lets not forget that it's also a self-interested action. We see that it was common to give food and supplies to poorer farmers just before winter starts. This would not only prevent them from starving to death in the winter but it also helped ensure that they wouldn't get the idea that it was better to try raiding a neighbor's home than starve to death" (written by the author of the blog). Self-serving and compassionate: maybe next season the farmer's luck would change and he would contribute back to the community.
These things can often be what attracts a less socially-inclined or overly arrogant person to begin with. Sometimes their main purpose of wanting to be Heathen is simply emotional reaction to other traditions without a lot of depth and sincerity involved.
Plenty of knee-jerk, to be sure. And then we have the Brosatrú and Vikingtrú... the "disenfranchised" angry young man who thinks he's a direct descendant of Ragnarr Loðbrók or Leifr Eiríksson, and if he wails
"Odinnnnnn!!!" enough he'll go to Valhalla.
If more people move past the fear of community relationships with people who might not perfectly agree with what they think, feel, believe it will begin to shift more. The need to find a church who fits our beliefs shouldn't still be there
Community, family, kinship, bonding, belonging, etc. aren't disposable parts of the traditions - they are the heart and foundation of them. Attitudes harmful or antagonistic to those things being more prevalent are...just wrong.
The thing today is that we don't need to rely on each other as we did in 980 AD, and that's a problem. If your barn burns down, or your roof blows off in a storm, you don't need to gather your neighborhood together for a barn-raising or roof-fixing. You call your homeowner's insurance company while your neighbors gawk and say "tsk tsk wow, tough break, ok talk to you later, good luck". If you lose your job or otherwise fall on hard times, you go to the unemployment office or find some way to sue your former employer for wrongful termination. OK, I freely admit I'm kind of harsh on neighborhoods and families today for personal reasons that may be skewed.
Solitary practice should be more circumstance than stubbornness.
And then we have the people, for some of the personality reasons mentioned above that
should be solitary practitioners.
