Last night... actually 2 nights ago, I witnessed the strangest thing. It was an experience from totally legal chemicals.
The best way to put it: I lost myself.
It started as a plan for a party. First of all, it was my week off. I figured I'd celebrate. I went to my GED class and took a pre-test and I was very, very out of it. It was at 10:30 AM, and i finally got done around 1 AM.
Called up a few friends and asked them to hang out, sort of a party. Originally it would've been 6 people, but ended up being 3 because by the time my chemical release started I had no time to pick up the other three in a very distant town.
I remember only parts: We were watching the movie "Carrie" and I couldn't make sense of what was happening, but I was very, very entertained.
It got to me 'breaking' my mind. I was crying and laughing at the same time. Happy and sad at the same time, both at extremes. My eyes were sad and my mouth was happy. It was the best feeling I ever felt.
Everything was happening at once. I felt the barrier between existence and non-existence. I actually felt myself as God. I was the Singularity that existed primary to the Big Bang, beginning of spacetime. I felt myself as all things and experience existenced through all things. It was almost like... eternity. What is life? What is reality? I kept repeating random numbers, letters, words, etc and couldn't think, just DO.
I kept telling my friends who were recording me; "I am Vishnu. I am God." and kept asking them, after we went to bed in the very cold garage, "Am i dead?" and the answer from one of my friend was the same every time; "No." and I always asked him how.
We talked about philosophical topics, many of them, and the thought process was so random. We jumped around from topics of the afterlife, why is there something rather than nothing, we are all one, reliving the same life over and over again for an eternity because the universe constantly closes in on itself as a singularity and expands again and all of the events happen exactly as they did before. lots of things.
I didn't sleep the entire night, I couldn't pee the entire night until the third time. I couldn't walk and thought I'd be paralyzed from this trip. My legs shook rapidly every time I stood up. I was convinced I was dead and in hell because I'd eternally never pee, I'd always be cold, I'd always hear snoring.
I felt connected to everything. I felt myself moving through time.
I think I'm leaving out quite a bit of important stuff, I just can't think back right now. Really needed to share this experience, very very intense and... divine I suppose I'd say.
The best way to put it: I lost myself.
It started as a plan for a party. First of all, it was my week off. I figured I'd celebrate. I went to my GED class and took a pre-test and I was very, very out of it. It was at 10:30 AM, and i finally got done around 1 AM.
Called up a few friends and asked them to hang out, sort of a party. Originally it would've been 6 people, but ended up being 3 because by the time my chemical release started I had no time to pick up the other three in a very distant town.
I remember only parts: We were watching the movie "Carrie" and I couldn't make sense of what was happening, but I was very, very entertained.
It got to me 'breaking' my mind. I was crying and laughing at the same time. Happy and sad at the same time, both at extremes. My eyes were sad and my mouth was happy. It was the best feeling I ever felt.
Everything was happening at once. I felt the barrier between existence and non-existence. I actually felt myself as God. I was the Singularity that existed primary to the Big Bang, beginning of spacetime. I felt myself as all things and experience existenced through all things. It was almost like... eternity. What is life? What is reality? I kept repeating random numbers, letters, words, etc and couldn't think, just DO.
I kept telling my friends who were recording me; "I am Vishnu. I am God." and kept asking them, after we went to bed in the very cold garage, "Am i dead?" and the answer from one of my friend was the same every time; "No." and I always asked him how.
We talked about philosophical topics, many of them, and the thought process was so random. We jumped around from topics of the afterlife, why is there something rather than nothing, we are all one, reliving the same life over and over again for an eternity because the universe constantly closes in on itself as a singularity and expands again and all of the events happen exactly as they did before. lots of things.
I didn't sleep the entire night, I couldn't pee the entire night until the third time. I couldn't walk and thought I'd be paralyzed from this trip. My legs shook rapidly every time I stood up. I was convinced I was dead and in hell because I'd eternally never pee, I'd always be cold, I'd always hear snoring.
I felt connected to everything. I felt myself moving through time.
I think I'm leaving out quite a bit of important stuff, I just can't think back right now. Really needed to share this experience, very very intense and... divine I suppose I'd say.
