Feeling Sorry For One's Self?

[Pussyfoot Mouse]

Is it selfish to feel sorry for yourself? I've had something happen in my life and I just can't help feeling sorry for myself. Although I know there isn't anything I can do to change what's happened and I know this affects other people, not just myself, I just can't help feeling this way.

 

[NoName]

I don't think there's anything wrong. What I think is wrong is if you then start assuming others should feel sorry for you, too, and then getting mad if they don't. You shouldn't force your feelings onto other people like that.

 

[Darkdale]

Is it selfish to feel sorry for yourself?

I would say yes, but that isn't way it is bad. It's bad because it is terribly unproductive and it decreases your ability to function and "move on".

 

[Sunstone]

Is it selfish to feel sorry for yourself? I've had something happen in my life and I just can't help feeling sorry for myself. Although I know there isn't anything I can do to change what's happened and I know this affects other people, not just myself, I just can't help feeling this way.

"Been there, done that, been to therapy, got the T-shirt to prove it." A good therapist might help you with those feelings. If you go into a depression that lasts more than two weeks, Pussyfoot, be sure to take care of yourself by seeing a doctor or psychiatrist.

 

[michel]

Is it selfish to feel sorry for yourself? I've had something happen in my life and I just can't help feeling sorry for myself. Although I know there isn't anything I can do to change what's happened and I know this affects other people, not just myself, I just can't help feeling this way.

I would say it is a natural instinct of expressing one's grief (perhaps when there is no one else to do it for you). When it becomes unhealthy, in my opinion, is when it is protracted (SP ?)......feeling sorry for oneself O.K, but then acknowledge it and move on.

 

[AtheistAJ]

I would say yes, but that isn't way it is bad. It's bad because it is terribly unproductive and it decreases your ability to function and "move on".

Ditto. Think of it like "Big deal! Who cares!" and do something productive. It's most wrong if it only concerns personal benefit.

 

[Jaymes]

It's only selfish if someone makes no effort to move on. Moving on doesn't mean forgetting or anything like that... just not letting it keep you for functioning.

Though I must admit I feel selfish when I get frustrated or upset over something small when I know others have so much less.

 

[lilithu]

Is it selfish to feel sorry for yourself? I've had something happen in my life and I just can't help feeling sorry for myself. Although I know there isn't anything I can do to change what's happened and I know this affects other people, not just myself, I just can't help feeling this way.

Reframe the question: is it productive to feel sorry for oneself? And you've already answered the question.

There is no point in asking whether it's selfish. What you're really asking is whether it's wrong, and thereby you are piling further misery upon yourself than you are already in. "I feel sorry for myself, and I feel guilty for feeling sorry for myself." Both the initial feeling and the meta-feeling, if you will, are unproductive. If, at this moment, you can't avoid feeling the first one, at least don't add to that by feeling the second one!

Are you sure there is nothing you can do? It may very well be that there is nothing you can do to undo what has happened, but that doesn't necessarily mean that there is nothing that you can do to change the consequences, even if it's only a very little bit. People often feel better about the situation and less sorry for themselves when they identify something that they can do and do it. Good luck and Blessed Be.

 

[Solon]

Is it selfish to feel sorry for yourself? I've had something happen in my life and I just can't help feeling sorry for myself. Although I know there isn't anything I can do to change what's happened and I know this affects other people, not just myself, I just can't help feeling this way.

No PFM, it is not selfish, emotional responses to adverse stimuli are unavoidable, unless a person is emotionless. Personally, I feel sorry for myself all time, it doesn't matter whether I blame my ex-wife, ex-girlfriends, ex-employers or myself, I still feel sorry for me. However, as the others have said, take some action if you feel your slipping into the abyss, seek out a medic.

Solon

 

[Ori]

It's not selfish, just try not to dwell on it too much.
I hope you feel better soon.

 

[Pussyfoot Mouse]

Not to worry everyone. I'm mentally fine, just really ticked off! I was just wondering if I was being selfish and childish. I'm definitely moving on with this issue and most certainly will NOT forget.
Thank you Everyone!