Gendered emotions in public

[Meow Mix]

EDIT: importantly, I forgot to include the word “more.” So for each category, think of it as saying “I’ve seen women do this more” or “I’ve seen men do this more.” Otherwise we’ll all just select all four since surely we’ve seen examples of each.

This is related to the other recent thread. There's a poll.

This poll allows multiple choices and is anonymous.

"Publicly" means anywhere in public, including the workplace especially.

In the poll, by "emotionally" I mean a person is being "too" emotional. So for instance, if someone receives news while at work that their family member just died, so they cry, that does not count. Use your best judgment to interpret this.

 

[Secret Chief]

This is related to the other recent thread. There's a poll.

This poll allows multiple choices and is anonymous.

"Publicly" means anywhere in public, including the workplace especially.

In the poll, by "emotionally" I mean a person is being "too" emotional. So for instance, if someone receives news while at work that their family member just died, so they cry, that does not count. Use your best judgment to interpret this.

Does blarting cos an animal has died on a TV programme fit the bill of too much? If so, I'm very too.

 

[Polymath257]

I haven't seen nearly as many men cry emotionally, but I've lived a while and have seen it.

I have seen *way* too many women cry because they didn't do well on a quiz or exam.

 

[PureX]

This really is not something I'm concerned about.

 

[Meow Mix]

I haven't seen nearly as many men cry emotionally, but I've lived a while and have seen it.

I have seen *way* too many women cry because they didn't do well on a quiz or exam.

I’d like to report this post, I’m in it and I don’t like it

(at least in undergrad classes I didn’t give a crap about)

 

[Meow Mix]

Also I’m realizing I really messed up and needed to include the qualifiers “more”

Because otherwise basically everyone sill select all four because of course we’ve seen examples of each at least once

 

[Meow Mix]

Does blarting cos an animal has died on a TV programme fit the bill of too much? If so, I'm very too.

What?

 

[Mock Turtle]

This really is not something I'm concerned about.

 

[ChristineM]

Does blarting cos an animal has died on a TV programme fit the bill of too much? If so, I'm very too.

Hubby will on occasion reach for the tissues on such an occasion

 

[ChristineM]

This really is not something I'm concerned about.

But concerned enough to comment that you are not concerned

 

[Secret Chief]

But concerned enough to comment that you are not concerned

I'm concerned that you're concerned enough to comment on someone commenting that they are not concerned.

 

[ChristineM]

I'm concerned that you're concerned enough to comment on someone commenting that they are not concerned.

Don't concern yourself

 

[Wildswanderer]

Ok, so I had to think about this a bit, both the question about men being less emotional and how we express emotions. I don't think we are less emotional, I think we express emotions different both because of our culture and because we are men.
We generally aren't as emotional in public , because it's kinda taboo, unless certain situations and conditions apply
But we also catagorize emotions differently. We box them up to examine later perhaps in private.
We put everything in different boxes. Relationship in one box, work in another, play in another and so on.
Women, IMO just let it all snarl together like a big hairball.
Maybe that's more holistic or healthy... I don't know. But I know I am not capable of doing that.

Take a marine. He has to squash his emotional reactions the vast majority of the time. But he can show affection for his buddies in public as long as it's done in a joking manner. And crying is fine if a buddy dies, but not crying over pain.
I'm sure I'll get in trouble for saying we process things differently but IMO it's obviously true in a general sense. Of course there are exceptions to every rule.

 

[PureX]

But concerned enough to comment that you are not concerned

Yup. It's a lot like declaring one's "unbelief", don't ya think?

 

[ChristineM]

Yup. It's a lot like declaring one's "unbelief", don't ya think?

No, i am proud of not believing in woo and magic

 

[crossfire]

<...>
In the poll, by "emotionally" I mean a person is being "too" emotional. So for instance, if someone receives news while at work that their family member just died, so they cry, that does not count. Use your best judgment to interpret this.

Do you mean "too" emotional as in being manipulative about it? If so, then yes, I've seen more women than men being "emotional" as a means of manipulation, and I have seen more men use "anger" as a threat of manipulative aggression. I see this type of manipulative emotion concentrated almost exclusively in younger women, but the manipulative anger/aggression/threat is seen in a much wider age range.

 

[sun rise]

In my generation, women crying and men angry was considered normal and social reinforcement followed. Even today, women politicians are disparaged for showing anger.

 

[Erebus]

I live near several pubs (Our town may only have one bus but it's vitally important we have nine pubs) so I've seen plenty of public expressions of emotion.

I've seen more women crying and more men getting angry.

 

[Mock Turtle]

I might add that having as normal emotions and reactions as seem natural to me I don't feel any need to suppress any, apart from situations where they might get in the way, and I can usually fathom when such is the case - like when one is operating any machinery or having to do something skilled and where an emotional reaction would hinder this.

 

[JustGeorge]

I might have done the poll wrong... but...

I see women more frequently get sad or angry in public. Honestly, I see more angry women than sad women. However, when I do see angry men, they tend to be more angry than the angry women I see.