Gift Giving for Holidays

[savagewind]

Society has ruled that there be days for which something should be given or done for someone for that day.

I hate it.

Am I the only one who realizes that doing something for someone on those days is because of the holiday and not just because you want to do it and because you want to show someone your appreciation and that you have been thinking of him or her?

 

[Revoltingest]

I hate gift obligations.
Everyone should just get what they want on their own!

 

[savagewind]

I hate gift obligations.
Everyone should just get what they want on their own!

I love to give gifts. I hate the feeling that I must give them.

 

[savagewind]

I was also thinking about the difference between the sexes and gift giving. It is my opinion that in the traditional home a woman is always giving to her mate and to her children. I think it would be nice that those with whom she is working every day would surprise her with a, "here, honey, I was just thinking about you and wanted you to know it". But, for them to always wait until a calendar day to do it means to me that it is the day that they are doing it for, not first to the person.

 

[Revoltingest]

I was also thinking about the difference between the sexes and gift giving. It is my opinion that in the traditional home a woman is always giving to her mate and to her children. I think it would be nice that those with whom she is working every day would surprise her with a, "here, honey, I was just thinking about you and wanted you to know it". But, for them to always wait until a calendar day to do it means to me that it is the day that they are doing it for, not first to the person.

You know the old saying....
Women are from Venus,
& men are from a dank cave in the woods.

 

[Father Heathen]

I hate gift obligations.
Everyone should just get what they want on their own!

It's usually the same gift cards to places that nobody shops/eats at that keep getting re-gifted, anyway.

You take an amount of money that could to used to buy anything and turn it into the same amount of money that can now only be used to buy a specific thing, so why not just give money? But then if everyone is giving each other money it just cancels out and becomes pointless. Just have a nice meal together, then play some cards afterwards or something.

 

[sun rise]

I was also thinking about the difference between the sexes and gift giving. It is my opinion that in the traditional home a woman is always giving to her mate and to her children. I think it would be nice that those with whom she is working every day would surprise her with a, "here, honey, I was just thinking about you and wanted you to know it". But, for them to always wait until a calendar day to do it means to me that it is the day that they are doing it for, not first to the person.

What you write makes sense to me but I would not express it so starkly. I particularly agree that gifts should not be an obligation no matter what.

 

[Grandliseur]

Society has ruled that there be days for which something should be given or done for someone for that day.

I hate it.

Am I the only one who realizes that doing something for someone on those days is because of the holiday and not just because you want to do it and because you want to show someone your appreciation and that you have been thinking of him or her?

I am not for the gift giving. Such obligations do not serve anyone. However, I am for the custom of families getting together at least once a year. This should be used by all, whether religious or not. Without some custom of getting together, make it a non-religious getting together holiday, families fall apart.

In this, I have to give my gripe a walk in public. Some religions clearly design their systems so as to cut people in their church off from friends and families. This to me is an abomination, a sin against God and people. People should be warned against accepting such dogma.

I saw this at work in my own family. Even when a beloved family member came to visit or wanted to visit, if it was church day, any kind of church activity, then it usually was 'we don't have time. We are busy.' Today, this to me is absolutely the work of the devil. As if such relatives would come so often that it would ever be a burden. Shame on such church dogma, and shame on such who enforce this.

 

[Onyx]

I think there should be a national holiday that allows giving the gift of your fist without risking jail time. Seriously though, if I want to gift something I'll just do it, not sure why there has to be special holy days when it is done out of obligation. (And causing trouble at Wal-Mart the prior day.)

 

[SalixIncendium]

I love giving gifts. I enjoy the feeling it brings. I'm one of those that enjoys giving more than receiving.

That said, I find the selection process problematic. I don't like the guessing game of whether or not the receiver will appreciate the gift or to what degree.

 

[savagewind]

I appreciate the responses and I agree. Thank you.

But, has anyone thought about it this way?

I believe giving should first be for the one to whom something is being given. The good feeling of giving can be secondary. I think that holidays put the receiver in third place. First, the Day. Second, the giver because the giver wants to be considered appropriate. And then lastly, the receiver. There is no doubt in the mind of the giver and in the mind of the receiver that it is the Day that caused the giving. On the other hand, there is no way for the one who receives something on society's special days whether the gift is out of appreciation, kindness, and goodness or if it is obligatory giving. Then, the receiver must resort to an assumption, which is something we don't like to do. Right?

 

[sun rise]

I believe giving should first be for the one to whom something is being given. The good feeling of giving can be secondary.

That's a wonderful ideal.