Help required urgently!

[Geoff-Allen]

Hope you're all well.

I have been doing a bit of creative writing and need to select JUST the right title for it!

Here are the possibilities - let me know which if any you prefer and a brief explanation - please, keep your explanations down to no more than 100 words

My brain is over-worked after the nearly 6 hours of spontaneously tapping away at the keyboard desperately hoping to write something insightful or at least amusing ...

Here are the possible titles -

"Imaginary conversations."

"The sad truth about the human race."

"Everything you ever wanted to know about the phenomenon of schizophrenia but were afraid to ask!"

"Enlightenment for dummies."

"Unsolved mysteries of the human mind."

"The art of living a completely insignificant life!"

"A colourful look at the history of normal behaviour."

"The correct way to be a nonconformist"

"Turn your mind on."

"Surprisingly cheap ways to expand your mind and enjoy the best sex anyone has ever experienced!"

"Everything you EVER wanted to know about happiness (but couldn't be bothered asking)"

"How to communicate with the sub-atomic aliens that are living in your brain."

"A brilliant and chaotic mind"

"Wake up before it is too late!"

"How to lose your mind (without losing your sense of humour)."

"A beginner's guide to this reality!"

"The art of contemplating the deepest mysteries of the human experience."

"Another brief history of madness."

"How to be satisfied even in a world gone mad - yes - it is possible even if it is fairly rare!"

"Get rich by purchasing this book for one hundred of your closest friends & relatives!"

"How to sit & contemplate your own existence."

"The meaning of life - as revealed to me by the voices in my head!"

"God loves me! But he cannot stomach most of you poor sods."

I'm only joking with you about that last one - blame it all on the voices-in-my-head!

If you would like to read my stuff - let me email it to you - it's far too long & complicated to be posted here

All the best!

 

[Quagmire]

I like this one:

"The art of living a completely insignificant life!"

Or this one with a small edit [in red]:

"Everything you EVER wanted to know about happiness (but were too depressed to ask)"

 

[Quagmire]

I always wanted to write a book and call it Organic Spandex.

No idea what it would be about, so the title is perfect.

 

[sun rise]

"How to lose your mind (without losing your sense of humour)."

I like that one.

 

[Eddi]

Hope you're all well.

I have been doing a bit of creative writing and need to select JUST the right title for it!

Here are the possibilities - let me know which if any you prefer and a brief explanation - please, keep your explanations down to no more than 100 words

My brain is over-worked after the nearly 6 hours of spontaneously tapping away at the keyboard desperately hoping to write something insightful or at least amusing ...

Here are the possible titles -

"Imaginary conversations."

"The sad truth about the human race."

"Everything you ever wanted to know about the phenomenon of schizophrenia but were afraid to ask!"

"Enlightenment for dummies."

"Unsolved mysteries of the human mind."

"The art of living a completely insignificant life!"

"A colourful look at the history of normal behaviour."

"The correct way to be a nonconformist"

"Turn your mind on."

"Surprisingly cheap ways to expand your mind and enjoy the best sex anyone has ever experienced!"

"Everything you EVER wanted to know about happiness (but couldn't be bothered asking)"

"How to communicate with the sub-atomic aliens that are living in your brain."

"A brilliant and chaotic mind"

"Wake up before it is too late!"

"How to lose your mind (without losing your sense of humour)."

"A beginner's guide to this reality!"

"The art of contemplating the deepest mysteries of the human experience."

"Another brief history of madness."

"How to be satisfied even in a world gone mad - yes - it is possible even if it is fairly rare!"

"Get rich by purchasing this book for one hundred of your closest friends & relatives!"

"How to sit & contemplate your own existence."

"The meaning of life - as revealed to me by the voices in my head!"

"God loves me! But he cannot stomach most of you poor sods."

I'm only joking with you about that last one - blame it all on the voices-in-my-head!

If you would like to read my stuff - let me email it to you - it's far too long & complicated to be posted here

All the best!

I like them all

But my favourite is "The sad truth about the human race."

If I was given a selection of books, each with one of the titles you have come up with, then I'd go for that one first

What's this book of yours going to be about?

 

[Brickjectivity]

"A colourful look at the history of normal behaviour."

I prefer that one.

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Thanks for the replies!

I am still at the computer 12 hours after I started with only brief breaks for yoga & meals ...

I just noticed a blunder - Quagmire chose one that got a little editing later -

"How to enjoy the art of being insignificant."

My personal favourite? The condensed book -

"A complete history of the universe in every detail (without all the disgusting things people seem to insist on doing to each other)."

Yes I know I only mentioned a few and that was not available as a choice for anyone until now ...

Cheers!

 

[atanu]

Hope you're all well.

I have been doing a bit of creative writing and need to select JUST the right title for it!

Here are the possibilities - let me know which if any you prefer and a brief explanation - please, keep your explanations down to no more than 100 words

My brain is over-worked after the nearly 6 hours of spontaneously tapping away at the keyboard desperately hoping to write something insightful or at least amusing ...

Here are the possible titles -

"Imaginary conversations."

"The sad truth about the human race."

"Everything you ever wanted to know about the phenomenon of schizophrenia but were afraid to ask!"

"Enlightenment for dummies."

"Unsolved mysteries of the human mind."

"The art of living a completely insignificant life!"

"A colourful look at the history of normal behaviour."

"The correct way to be a nonconformist"

"Turn your mind on."

"Surprisingly cheap ways to expand your mind and enjoy the best sex anyone has ever experienced!"

"Everything you EVER wanted to know about happiness (but couldn't be bothered asking)"

"How to communicate with the sub-atomic aliens that are living in your brain."

"A brilliant and chaotic mind"

"Wake up before it is too late!"

"How to lose your mind (without losing your sense of humour)."

"A beginner's guide to this reality!"

"The art of contemplating the deepest mysteries of the human experience."

"Another brief history of madness."

"How to be satisfied even in a world gone mad - yes - it is possible even if it is fairly rare!"

"Get rich by purchasing this book for one hundred of your closest friends & relatives!"

"How to sit & contemplate your own existence."

"The meaning of life - as revealed to me by the voices in my head!"

"God loves me! But he cannot stomach most of you poor sods."

I'm only joking with you about that last one - blame it all on the voices-in-my-head!

If you would like to read my stuff - let me email it to you - it's far too long & complicated to be posted here

All the best!

I think none is good. I suggest “Ruminations of a Resident Megalomaniac’.

 

[dybmh]

"brilliant chaos?" or "chaotic brilliance"

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Here's a few more possible titles -

"I'd much rather meditate than watch TV"

"How to breathe properly!"

"The adventure of being human"

"If love is the answer, what on Earth is the question?"

"How to make bigger & better mistakes"

"Atheism makes your body and mind look so much better than most religious fanatics"

"The big book of jokes by atheists showing utter contempt for the wonderful personalities of religious fanatics"

"How to become an absolute genius in 5 minutes per day"

"Improve your family relationships using hypnosis!"

"How to solve all the world's problems with ten dollars per day"

"Jokes that will make you irresistible to the opposite gender"

 

[Thief]

Hope you're all well.

I have been doing a bit of creative writing and need to select JUST the right title for it!

Here are the possibilities - let me know which if any you prefer and a brief explanation - please, keep your explanations down to no more than 100 words

My brain is over-worked after the nearly 6 hours of spontaneously tapping away at the keyboard desperately hoping to write something insightful or at least amusing ...

Here are the possible titles -

"Imaginary conversations."

"The sad truth about the human race."

"Everything you ever wanted to know about the phenomenon of schizophrenia but were afraid to ask!"

"Enlightenment for dummies."

"Unsolved mysteries of the human mind."

"The art of living a completely insignificant life!"

"A colourful look at the history of normal behaviour."

"The correct way to be a nonconformist"

"Turn your mind on."

"Surprisingly cheap ways to expand your mind and enjoy the best sex anyone has ever experienced!"

"Everything you EVER wanted to know about happiness (but couldn't be bothered asking)"

"How to communicate with the sub-atomic aliens that are living in your brain."

"A brilliant and chaotic mind"

"Wake up before it is too late!"

"How to lose your mind (without losing your sense of humour)."

"A beginner's guide to this reality!"

"The art of contemplating the deepest mysteries of the human experience."

"Another brief history of madness."

"How to be satisfied even in a world gone mad - yes - it is possible even if it is fairly rare!"

"Get rich by purchasing this book for one hundred of your closest friends & relatives!"

"How to sit & contemplate your own existence."

"The meaning of life - as revealed to me by the voices in my head!"

"God loves me! But he cannot stomach most of you poor sods."

I'm only joking with you about that last one - blame it all on the voices-in-my-head!

If you would like to read my stuff - let me email it to you - it's far too long & complicated to be posted here

All the best!

you do need help......if it really took six hours to post your op

 

[Thief]

Here's a few more possible titles -

"I'd much rather meditate than watch TV"

"How to breathe properly!"

"The adventure of being human"

"If love is the answer, what on Earth is the question?"

"How to make bigger & better mistakes"

"Atheism makes your body and mind look so much better than most religious fanatics"

"The big book of jokes by atheists showing utter contempt for the wonderful personalities of religious fanatics"

"How to become an absolute genius in 5 minutes per day"

"Improve your family relationships using hypnosis!"

"How to solve all the world's problems with ten dollars per day"

"Jokes that will make you irresistible to the opposite gender"

how to amuse yourself with psychedelic drugs and a keyboard

 

[Revoltingest]

The title I like is a ripoff from Anthony Burgess....
A Clockwork Haggis

 

[Geoff-Allen]

you do need help......if it really took six hours to post your op

I wrote a LOT more than I posted here - I made it into a webpage and it's too much to post here but it does contain the true secret-of-life according to the voices-in-my-head.

Thanks for participating - here are some more possible titles -

"How to win arguments by shouting at everyone!"

"World's kinkiest accountants"

"How to please your partner with your clothes on"

"Speak to the universe about attracting your ideal mate!"

"Are you curious about this book?"

"How to respond to life's most puzzling mysteries and make lots of new friends"

"Put an extra onion in your pocket"

"One hundred uses for old toothpaste"

"How to win friends by giving them all of your cash"

"I suppose it is possible that I could be wrong about everything"

"Improve your self-confidence by imitating history's most powerful dictators"

"I believe that the glorious nightmares of existence are best experienced with minimal resistance"

"How to observe your own mind in action and put an end to all boredom in your life"

I took a few breaks - so it wasn't 6 full hours non-stop. I may be crazy but that is a bit much even for me ...

Enjoy your day!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

how to amuse yourself with psychedelic drugs and a keyboard

Good suggestion! I don't need to take drugs - my mind is just naturally surreal almost of the time ...

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

They keep on popping into my head - I don't think I can stop them ...

Here's the latest batch -

"1001 proven & expertly researched tips on how to be completely spontansous!"

"How to understand a woman's moods - now with over 200 new diagrams"

"My ego is MUCH better than yours!"

"The expert's guide to climbing trees"

"A brilliant but fragile mind"

"The colossal, huge, immense, amazing book of enormous fun for the whole family - including any pets and neighbours who may be visiting!"

"How to solve all of your personal problems within 10 life-times (or your money cheerfully refunded)"

"Guide to identifying & understanding obnoxious behaviour"

"Life is a half-eaten onion sandwich so try not to end up in the ditch"

"My ego is MUCH better than yours!"

"The complete guide to collecting twigs - now with an exciting centrefold!"

"A funny thing happened to me today on the psych ward!"

"101 unexpected uses for the Bible"

"Religious ecstasy for dummies"

"How to expand your consciousness and impress all of your family & friends"

"The voices in my head tell me that I am completely sane!"

"How to make bigger & better mistakes!"

"1000 myths about the normal woman's mind"

""


Enjoy your day!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Here's a couple of quotes I found - all about writers -

“There are reasons people seek escape in books, and one of those reasons is that the boundary of what can happen is beyond what we do – or would want to see in real life.”

~ James Patterson

“The true alchemists do not change lead into gold; they change the world into words.”

~ William H. Gass

“Description begins in the writer’s imagination, but should finish in the reader’s.”

~ Stephen King

“There is only one plot — things are not what they seem.”

~ Jim Thompson

Writing Quotes: 101 Quotes for Writers to Inspire You