If the poster above was a superhero.....

[Brickjectivity]

Nobody ever remembers what @Soandso looks like. They cannot be identified even if next to a photo of themselves. This is why they can never get through the passport lane or make friends. They have to live using cash only. On the other hand they are anonymous wherever they go which can be useful.

 

[Tomef]

The super version of @Brickjectivity is able to modulate online forum poster’s posting habits, tuning intensity and frequency at will. On a good day, this leads to supervillains forgetting their nefarious plans and posting memes instead.

 

[Brickjectivity]

@Tomef is a living Monopoly Go2Jail card. If he hands you a coupon your feet will begin to dance and take you directly to get that coupon exchanged at the local lockup. You will not pass Go or collect $200.

 

[Wirey]

@Brickjectivity can slam a revolving door.

 

[Tomef]

@Wirey can wire up RF posters so that they are granted open minds and vast knowledge. They experience something like their own personal enlightenment, seeing in an instant how foolish all of their previous ideas and posts have been. It doesn’t last more than a few minutes tho, usually running out by the time they have their fingers poised over the keys, ready to declare their newfound insights. Then they just go back to posting the same dumb ****.

 

[Secret Chief]

Tomef has a therianthropist superpower. They can shapeshift at will into a porpoise, although has yet to feel the need to.

 

[Brickjectivity]

He always wears very baggy parachute pants that make him quite mysterious, so beware. @Secret Chief can drop ball bearings of any size, of any number and can will them to last until he wants them to magically disappear. Do they come from his steel will? No one knows.

 

[Gargovic Malkav]

He always wears very baggy parachute pants that make him quite mysterious, so beware. @Secret Chief can drop ball bearings of any size, of any number and can will them to last until he wants them to magically disappear. Do they come from his steel will? No one knows.

Subjectivity is there to see the injustice.
Objectivity is there to confirm it.
Brickjecktivity is there to save the day.