if your girlfriend/wife contacts her ex-boyfriends, and inverse

[Shadow Wolf]

Don't worry your English is quite good..practice makes perfect. English isn't my first language so I know that translating to another language while you think in a different language can get quite difficult

That it is. Some of the German people I know tell me that my German is "very American." Understandable, but undeniably American.

 

[Akivah]

in 2)
SO if someone harassed your wife , or your wife harassed someone afront of you , what will be your reaction since you are not jealous man ?

Your poor English may be tripping you up, so I'm not sure of what you're asking. Harassment is defined as 'disturbing, pestering, or troubling repeatedly'. Harassment is an unwanted situation. If someone harasses either of us, then my reaction would be to call the police. I would not be jealous of the aggressor, I'd be fearful and try to get away from them. And a man harassing a woman typically leads to prosecution, not consensual sex.

then If we give a space to your wife to cheat on you , could you blame her ?

This is the crux of your beliefs, I think. You believe that if your wife has any opportunity to cheat on you, that she will. You ignore any actual desires on her part, her motivations, and her rationalizations. It seems to me that you believe if she is simply in the same room with any male, that she will automatically have sex with them.

Simply being in the same room with a member of the opposite sex does not automatically result in sexual relationships. All sorts of people work together, attend events, etc without sex happening between them. Sexual relationships need far more than mere proximity to occur.

 

[Kirran]

Who said women are not adult human beings ?

btw , i guess you hindu , what is hinduism tell about this (wife/husband contact his/her ex ), and about obedience of the wife to her husband ?

I am make a point to , that you never make excuse to a serious wrong decisions then regret that the consequnces.

You implied it. You said that allowing a woman to meet her ex-boyfriend/husband would be like letting children play with a gun. Do you really think that that is a fair comparison?

I'm gonna do a thought experiment. Imagine you get married, then divorce, and marry another woman. Now, on one occasion you find yourself meeting your ex-wife without your current wife being present. Maybe you talk, catch up, etc. Can you conceive of any scenario ensuing in which you do not have sex with your ex-wife? If it is in fact possible that you wouldn't automatically have sex with with your ex, then might that be due to the fact that one or both of you consciously decided to not have sex? Meaning that people are actually in control over whether they have sex or not?

This is the crux of your beliefs, I think. You believe that if your wife has any opportunity to cheat on you, that she will. You ignore any actual desires on her part, her motivations, and her rationalizations. It seems to me that you believe if she is simply in the same room with any male, that she will automatically have sex with them.

This is very well summarised, and I think accurately cuts to the core of your beliefs in this regard, @Godobeyer.

 

[Godobeyer]

Kirran i am still waiting your respond for this question :

btw , i guess you hindu , what is hinduism tell about this (wife/husband contact his/her ex ), and about obedience of the wife to her husband ?

 

[Godobeyer]

You implied it. You said that allowing a woman to meet her ex-boyfriend/husband would be like (they very probably restore their memories and apply it to present) , letting children play with a gun (that may cause kill them selfs or others). Do you really think that that is a fair comparison?

i write inside your reply by bold font , to understand my point .

so both had may bad consequences , 20% soon or 70% late or 10% never .

that's my percentage , maybe your had yours .

I'm gonna do a thought experiment. Imagine you get married, then divorce, and marry another woman. Now, on one occasion you find yourself meeting your ex-wife without your current wife being present. Maybe you talk, catch up, etc. Can you conceive of any scenario ensuing in which you do not have sex with your ex-wife? If it is in fact possible that you wouldn't automatically have sex with with your ex, then might that be due to the fact that one or both of you consciously decided to not have sex? Meaning that people are actually in control over whether they have sex or not?

occasion or necessry issue conversation in regular subjects in regular areas her home with her parent or in public area , is very different than she stay my friend and stay contact with her . you seems mixed the situations

 

[Kirran]

Kirran i am still waiting your respond for this question :

btw , i guess you hindu , what is hinduism tell about this (wife/husband contact his/her ex ), and about obedience of the wife to her husband ?

Oh, I do apologise Godobeyer.

I am Hindu. Hinduism tells us nothing about this. Hinduism is hugely broad. The level of diversity of Islam, Christianity and Judaism put together would fit into one tradition within Hinduism. So there's very very little which is universal, and certainly not prescriptions on whether or not someone can contact their ex.

Key to much of Hinduism is not causing suffering. So we can go from there. Oppressing and limiting others unduly causes suffering. Indulging your own insecurity causes suffering to yourself. So, bad.

 

[Kirran]

i write inside your reply by bold font , to understand my point .

so both had may bad consequences , 20% soon or 70% late or 10% never .

that's my percentage , maybe your had yours .

An adult woman is not a child. She has control over and understanding of the situation.

occasion or necessry issue conversation in regular subjects in regular areas her home with her parent or in public area , is very different than she stay my friend and stay contact with her . you seems mixed the situations

So in what situation does your wife lose her ability to not have sex with somebody?

 

[Godobeyer]

Oh, I do apologise Godobeyer.

I am Hindu. Hinduism tells us nothing about this. Hinduism is hugely broad. The level of diversity of Islam, Christianity and Judaism put together would fit into one tradition within Hinduism. So there's very very little which is universal, and certainly not prescriptions on whether or not someone can contact their ex.

Key to much of Hinduism is not causing suffering. So we can go from there. Oppressing and limiting others unduly causes suffering. Indulging your own insecurity causes suffering to yourself. So, bad.

ok , no problem

I watch a indian movies , they always show the wife knees to the parent of her husband .

 

[Kirran]

ok , no problem

I watch a indian movies , they always show the wife knees to the parent of her husband .

The wife knees? How do you mean?

 

[Godobeyer]

The wife knees? How do you mean?

sorry i mean she touch their feet by her hand as respect

 

[Kirran]

sorry i mean she touch their feet by her hand as respect

Oh, I see. Indian customs Nice custom to show respect, I think.

Many traditions within Hinduism are very big on critical thinking. That is, question things, reason things, see if it makes sense.

 

[Godobeyer]

Oh, I see. Indian customs Nice custom to show respect, I think.

Many traditions within Hinduism are very big on critical thinking. That is, question things, reason things, see if it makes sense.

Just curious if you agree on with this site of hinduism statement , about wife

this is the link :

http://www.hinduism.co.za/women.htm
"For a wife during her life-time, the husband is both god and lord alike"

 

[Godobeyer]

Your poor English may be tripping you up, so I'm not sure of what you're asking. Harassment is defined as 'disturbing, pestering, or troubling repeatedly'. Harassment is an unwanted situation. If someone harasses either of us, then my reaction would be to call the police. I would not be jealous of the aggressor, I'd be fearful and try to get away from them. And a man harassing a woman typically leads to prosecution, not consensual sex.

yes it's about flirt not harassing .

This is the crux of your beliefs, I think. You believe that if your wife has any opportunity to cheat on you, that she will. You ignore any actual desires on her part, her motivations, and her rationalizations. It seems to me that you believe if she is simply in the same room with any male, that she will automatically have sex with them.

Simply being in the same room with a member of the opposite sex does not automatically result in sexual relationships. All sorts of people work together, attend events, etc without sex happening between them. Sexual relationships need far more than mere proximity to occur.

it's about trust , so it's may convert to overtrust or untrust , that's depened to each person .

May you accept the EX of your wife contact your wife , and may others reject this .

this not heaven , and masked bad people are more enough to don't trust the EX of my wife .

 

[Kirran]

Just curious if you agree on with this site of hinduism statement , about wife

this is the link :

http://www.hinduism.co.za/women.htm
"For a wife during her life-time, the husband is both god and lord alike"

Yes, and vice versa.

 

[Godobeyer]

Yes, and vice versa.

Did tells the husband that his wife is god and lord ?

which verse please ?

 

[Kirran]

Did tells the husband that his wife is god and lord ?

which verse please ?

What?

 

[Godobeyer]

What?

Yes, and vice versa.

you said "vice versa."
does your Hollybook , tells the husband that his wife is his god and his lord ?

as he tells to wife

 

[Kirran]

you said "vice versa."
does your Hollybook , tells the husband that his wife is his god and his lord ?

as he tells to wife

Hinduism is generally nowhere near as scripture-centric as Abrahamic traditions like Islam.

So I don't know if it says that in one of the many and varied Hindu scriptures.

 

[Akivah]

yes it's about flirt not harassing .

Oh, you meant flirting. Well that depends on how your spouse responds to it. A person could have valid cause for jealousy if their spouse behaves inappropriately. For example:

(male) Hey babe! You're looking sweet.
(your spouse) Get lost, jerk!
{No reason for jealousy.}

(male) Hey babe! You're looking sweet.
(your spouse) You're a fine looking stud. Let's get naked and get it on.
{Reason for jealousy.}

So, it depends.

 

[Marisa]

This is the crux of your beliefs, I think. You believe that if your wife has any opportunity to cheat on you, that she will. You ignore any actual desires on her part, her motivations, and her rationalizations. It seems to me that you believe if she is simply in the same room with any male, that she will automatically have sex with them.

That's the thing that @Godobeyer seems to be missing. That when you make your romantic/sexual reactions someone else's responsibility, as in suggesting that someone's clothing can reasonably be considered harassment, then it removes the individual's personal responsibility for their own actions. They can say "I would not have harassed that woman had she been properly clothed" and not realize they are failing to take responsibility for their own actions and engaging in victim blaming.