I've never fit the social norm

[Mister Silver]

I have social issues, but as far as I know I am not autistic. I think I would know at my old age.

I have certainly been compared to people who do have autism, however, which is strange.

Neither am I a psycho, which could be considered the other end of the spectrum. I have never felt the need to kill anything or anyone.

I do understand rules and laws. I follow them.

However, I have always been socially awkward. When people first meet me, I am shy. Then I open up and they start to shy away from me. It's always been the pattern.

I suppose it might be due to the fact that I tend to explain logical concepts that others find disconcerting because they find those concepts less than desirable. Desire, emotion, has no place in logic, right?

Also, I find tact to be useless in social situations. Honesty is a rule, tact is a construct of little value that merely allows people to live in a false comfort. People are offended by my honesty, and it is due to the fact that they cannot handle the truth. I will always be truthful rather than provide that which is a false comfort; it is the only logical concept.

 

[Sunstone]

How old are you, Silver. I've honestly been under the impression you're about 14 -- which is why I've been going easy on you.

 

[SabahTheLoner]

I have asburger syndrome and I've always had similar social issues. I'm usually labeled as shy but I'm actually somewhat cautious of people. The minute I seem to open up to someone they want to walk away from me. I don't know if it's because I'm not good at controlling my emotions or I turn out to be someone people don't expect me to be. People think I seem innocent but then I get excited about "morbid" topics like skulls and they seem to want to turn me down. Or I say something "strange" and they don't talk to me again.

Maybe some people don't find comfort in the truth while others like to know the truth.

 

[Mister Silver]

How old are you, Silver. I've honestly been under the impression you're about 14 -- which is why I've been going easy on you.

I am thirty-eight years old.

 

[Enoch07]

Also, I find tact to be useless in social situations. Honesty is a rule, tact is a construct of little value that merely allows people to live in a false comfort. People are offended by my honesty, and it is due to the fact that they cannot handle the truth. I will always be truthful rather than provide that which is a false comfort; it is the only logical concept.

I was gonna say sounds like Asperger syndrome - Wikipedia

I have asburger syndrome and I've always had similar social issues. I'm usually labeled as shy but I'm actually somewhat cautious of people. The minute I seem to open up to someone they want to walk away from me. I don't know if it's because I'm not good at controlling my emotions or I turn out to be someone people don't expect me to be. People think I seem innocent but then I get excited about "morbid" topics like skulls and they seem to want to turn me down. Or I say something "strange" and they don't talk to me again.

Maybe some people don't find comfort in the truth while others like to know the truth.

I think I have a touch of Aspergers as well. I do ok in small groups. 3-6 people maybe. But any larger and I am uncomfortable. I also don't understans social activities, like dancing. I understand that some people hear music and it makes their body move because they enjoy it, but it does not make my body move and yet I still enjoy it. I study people dancing like a scientist studies a lab rat injected with heroine.

I too often offend people with my blunt truth. I do not mean to be offensive, but I don't like beating around the bush, because I feel like it muddies the message. I just vomit out the truth there it is in raw form. /shrug

Anyways your not alone, obviously.

 

[Mister Silver]

I was gonna say sounds like Asperger syndrome - Wikipedia

Perhaps. I've never been formerly evaluated to the point where I could be diagnosed as to why I am different.

 

[Enoch07]

Perhaps. I've never been formerly evaluated to the point where I could be diagnosed as to why I am different.

I would never say for certain, but I think its something you could look into if you so felt inclined. I have never been formerly diagnosed either. But I like my odd quirkiness, and my close friends and family accept me anyways so thats all that really matters to me.

 

[Kapalika]

I do understand rules and laws. I follow them.

[omitted]

I suppose it might be due to the fact that I tend to explain logical concepts that others find disconcerting because they find those concepts less than desirable. Desire, emotion, has no place in logic, right?

Also, I find tact to be useless in social situations. Honesty is a rule, tact is a construct of little value that merely allows people to live in a false comfort. People are offended by my honesty, and it is due to the fact that they cannot handle the truth. I will always be truthful rather than provide that which is a false comfort; it is the only logical concept.

If you believe in rules why are you admittedly so rude and breaking the social rules of your culture? I actually have autism spectrum disorder and I'm bothered by the comparison. We are not intentionally rude we are just unaware. Someone like you knows they are rude but decides to justify it with "logic".

Often times such "logic" is just a rationalization, from emotion masked as "logic" to justify someone's inconsiderate behavior.

And hey, that's my honest opinion. No emotional response has a place in my "logical" view on it. So it's not my fault if you get upset. (I hope you see this as the play of language it is)

 

[Evangelicalhumanist]

I think, when we're first getting to know people, that the very best rule for "getting along" is to remember that we have two ears, but only one mouth -- and then use them in proportion! That is, listen more than you talk. I'll bet you find people warm to you more easily then. And you might also find yourself suddenly getting interested in them, too!

 

[Mister Silver]

If you believe in rules why are you admittedly so rude and breaking the social rules of your culture? I actually have autism spectrum disorder and I'm bothered by the comparison. We are not intentionally rude we are just unaware. Someone like you knows they are rude but decides to justify it with "logic".

Often times such "logic" is just a rationalization, from emotion masked as "logic" to justify someone's inconsiderate behavior.

And hey, that's my honest opinion. No emotional response has a place in my "logical" view on it. So it's not my fault if you get upset. (I hope you see this as the play of language it is)

I apologize if you misunderstood my original post.

I was not personally making a comparison between myself and autism. I clearly stated that others thought that, and that I did not see the comparison.

As far as being rude, I am not logically following your line of thought. You're the one who inserted your personal interpretation of me being rude into your argument to discredit me, though I am uncertain as to why. I do not consider myself rude, just honest. I suppose I can understand how others would find my honesty rude, but that is their problem, not mine. Honesty is something we should all value.

 

[Revoltingest]

I have social issues, but as far as I know I am not autistic. I think I would know at my old age.

I have certainly been compared to people who do have autism, however, which is strange.

Neither am I a psycho, which could be considered the other end of the spectrum. I have never felt the need to kill anything or anyone.

I do understand rules and laws. I follow them.

However, I have always been socially awkward. When people first meet me, I am shy. Then I open up and they start to shy away from me. It's always been the pattern.

I suppose it might be due to the fact that I tend to explain logical concepts that others find disconcerting because they find those concepts less than desirable. Desire, emotion, has no place in logic, right?

Also, I find tact to be useless in social situations. Honesty is a rule, tact is a construct of little value that merely allows people to live in a false comfort. People are offended by my honesty, and it is due to the fact that they cannot handle the truth. I will always be truthful rather than provide that which is a false comfort; it is the only logical concept.

Did you ever have an urge to study engineering, accounting or actuarial science?

 

[Mister Silver]

Did you ever have an urge to study engineering, accounting or actuarial science?

Nope. I'm no good at math.

 

[Revoltingest]

If you believe in rules why are you admittedly so rude and breaking the social rules of your culture? I actually have autism spectrum disorder and I'm bothered by the comparison. We are not intentionally rude we are just unaware. Someone like you knows they are rude but decides to justify it with "logic".

Often times such "logic" is just a rationalization, from emotion masked as "logic" to justify someone's inconsiderate behavior.

And hey, that's my honest opinion. No emotional response has a place in my "logical" view on it. So it's not my fault if you get upset. (I hope you see this as the play of language it is)

Being rude without knowing it....until there's an unexpected reaction.
Been there & done that!

 

[Revoltingest]

Nope. I'm no good at math.

One needn't be good at it to want to do it.

 

[Mister Silver]

One needn't be good at it to want to do it.

Still, those careers are paths I do not want to pursue.

 

[Revoltingest]

Still, those careers are paths I do not want to pursue.

Sounds like you have a shot at being normal.

 

[Mister Silver]

Sounds like you have a shot at being normal.

If that's your standardized test of normalcy, I'm more afraid for you than me.

 

[Revoltingest]

If that's your standardized test of normalcy, I'm more afraid for you than me.

Do not fear....whatever is wrong with me, I've figured out how to cope with it by now.

 

[LuisDantas]

Asperger and even Autism are IMO over-diagnosed, perhaps in part because we are currently so oriented towards fast reactions to stimuli and that takes some getting used to.

I suspect that you, @Mister Silver , is more socially normal than the OP suggests. I find myself wondering on how satisfactory your early social life was. You sound like you was on your own more often than you should have been.

 

[Kapalika]

I apologize if you misunderstood my original post.

I was not personally making a comparison between myself and autism. I clearly stated that others thought that, and that I did not see the comparison.

As far as being rude, I am not logically following your line of thought. You're the one who inserted your personal interpretation of me being rude into your argument to discredit me, though I am uncertain as to why. I do not consider myself rude, just honest. I suppose I can understand how others would find my honesty rude, but that is their problem, not mine. Honesty is something we should all value.

Logically not following me? I don't think you are using that word correctly here.

You're the one who inserted your personal interpretation of me being rude into your argument to discredit me, though I am uncertain as to why.

You straight up said " find tact to be useless" and "People are offended by my honesty"

That isn't interpretation. It's straight up what you told us.

You can see that as "discrediting" but I'm doing you a huge favor by illuminating a serious problem you need to address. You came here and posted about being a social outcast, and I'm giving you the way to not be one, and be accepted like you probably really want, given that you made this topic in the first place. A way to solve a lot of those social issues.

I do not consider myself rude, just honest.

You can be honest while also being polite. I'm doing it right now. Based on how you reacted I don't think you would truly appreciate me actually insulting you then tried to justify it with saying I'm just being honest about what I think.

but that is their problem, not mine.

It kind of is. But I'll let my homeboy Louie C.K. tell you why:

Some highlights of the bit:

"When a person tells you that you hurt them, you don't get to decide that you didn't." -Louie CK

"It's not up to you if you're an *******, it's up to everybody else." -Louie CK

This might be a radical idea to you @Mister Silver , but maybe you were more considerate you wouldn't find yourself an outcast so much.

You even know this is so when you admitted that "I suppose it might be due to the fact that I tend to..."

There's an old saying that goes to the effect of 'when you think it's everyone around you it's probably just you'. If you KNOW this pattern keeps repeating and it ALWAYS happens, it IS YOUR PROBLEM. You are the common thread in all of that. It's how you're acting.