MAN: "God will save me!" LION: "Yum!"

[CoolSunshine]

I was coming here just now to post this news!!
Hilarious! Thinking a little bit more he would have been able to com to the conclusion that God does not exist without having to lose his life. After that, who would claim that natural selection does not work?

 

[Quagmire]

I was coming here just now to post this news!!
Hilarious! Thinking a little bit more he would have been able to com to the conclusion that God does not exist without having to lose his life. After that, who would claim that natural selection does not work?

What denomination was the lion? Maybe he prayed for dinner.

 

[sandy whitelinger]

A guy’s in his house when horrendous rains come
up. The water starts rising, and before you know
it, we’re talking major flood. Roads are covered.
Nothing’s moving. Pretty soon, a boat comes along.
Guy in the boat yells, ‘Come on – we’re here to
save you. Get in the boat.’
Guy in the house says, ‘No…I’ve got faith that
God will save me.’
The boat leaves. The water keeps rising. The guy
is forced up the second floor of his house by the
flood waters. Another boat comes along. The guy in
the boat yells, ‘Come on! It’s getting worse. If
you don’t get in the boat, you’re going to drown.’
From the second floor window the guy says,
‘No…I’ll be ok. I’ve got faith in God that he’ll
save me.’
The boat leaves. Water’s rising. The
guy’s on the roof. A helicopter hovers overhead
and the pilot shouts out, ‘This is your last
chance. Climb up the ladder. If you don’t come
now you’re going to drown.’
The guy says from the roof, ‘No, thanks. God will
save me.’
The pilot shrugs his shoulders and splits. The
water rises. The guy drowns. Ascends to the pearly
gates. He asks St. Peter, ‘What happened? I’ve
been devoted to God and had absolute faith that he
would save me. Why did he let me down?’
And St. Peter tells him, ‘What the heck do you
want? God sent ya two boats and a helicopter!?’

 

[PolyHedral]

For shame! The cool phrase is 'nom!'

 

[Jayhawker Soule]

I was coming here just now to post this news!! Hilarious! Thinking a little bit more he would have been able to com to the conclusion that God does not exist without having to lose his life. After that, who would claim that natural selection does not work?

What's truly remarkable here is that you no doubt believe that you've said something really clever. Talk about a dumb belief system. :biglaugh:

 

[Meow Mix]

I was coming here just now to post this news!!
Hilarious! Thinking a little bit more he would have been able to com to the conclusion that God does not exist without having to lose his life. After that, who would claim that natural selection does not work?

I know you're probably joking, but nothing about the scenario you've depicted here demonstrates any evidence against the existence of a god in general. I could maybe see how it might tie into some sort of argument from the existence of suffering -- but that only works for gods that are supposed to be omnipotent, omniscient, and never malevolent.

 

[Quiddity]

Maybe you getting eaten is for the greater good.

 

[Riverwolf]

Maybe you getting eaten is for the greater good.

Removing stupidity from the gene pool, perhaps? ^_^

TBH, the "greater good" argument will pretty much always fall flat unless plausible scenarios can be provided that basically illustrate that there literally was no other way to accomplish what needed to be accomplished.

 

[Jayhawker Soule]

Maybe you getting eaten is for the greater good.

As he said: "Natural selection." God works in mysterious ways ...

 

[ChristineES]

This thread is amusing me. :biglaugh:

 

[CoolSunshine]

What's truly remarkable here is that you no doubt believe that you've said something really clever. Talk about a dumb belief system. :biglaugh:

This news is not clever but hilarious Mr Smarty!:flirt:

 

[CoolSunshine]

What denomination was the lion? Maybe he prayed for dinner.

Ironically both of them were praying

 

[CoolSunshine]

I know you're probably joking,

You are right MsMeow(aww..)

 

[whygodwhy]

A guy’s in his house when horrendous rains come
up. The water starts rising, and before you know
it, we’re talking major flood. Roads are covered.
Nothing’s moving. Pretty soon, a boat comes along.
Guy in the boat yells, ‘Come on – we’re here to
save you. Get in the boat.’
Guy in the house says, ‘No…I’ve got faith that
God will save me.’
The boat leaves. The water keeps rising. The guy
is forced up the second floor of his house by the
flood waters. Another boat comes along. The guy in
the boat yells, ‘Come on! It’s getting worse. If
you don’t get in the boat, you’re going to drown.’
From the second floor window the guy says,
‘No…I’ll be ok. I’ve got faith in God that he’ll
save me.’
The boat leaves. Water’s rising. The
guy’s on the roof. A helicopter hovers overhead
and the pilot shouts out, ‘This is your last
chance. Climb up the ladder. If you don’t come
now you’re going to drown.’
The guy says from the roof, ‘No, thanks. God will
save me.’
The pilot shrugs his shoulders and splits. The
water rises. The guy drowns. Ascends to the pearly
gates. He asks St. Peter, ‘What happened? I’ve
been devoted to God and had absolute faith that he
would save me. Why did he let me down?’
And St. Peter tells him, ‘What the heck do you
want? God sent ya two boats and a helicopter!?’

I actually just googled this joke to use in a Blog post, ironic that I saw it here... Or perhaps Gods will The blog is Flavors of God, on Blogspot, check it out.

 

[CoolSunshine]

I actually just googled this joke to use in a Blog post, ironic that I saw it here... Or perhaps Gods will The blog is Flavors of God, on Blogspot, check it out.

God sent ya blogs and floods.

 

[Renji]

MAN: "God will save me!" LION: "Yum!"

Would the lion actually say the word "Yum" instead of giving a loud roar?

 

[AmbiguousGuy]

Ironically both of them were praying

I was outside the other night and heard a squirrel crying, which is weird since I’ve never heard a squirrel call at nighttime. So I got my spotlight to check it out.

The cry was coming from a squirrel nest – a bundle of sticks about the size of a soccer ball.

As I shone the light up there, a great owl took wing. He’d been sitting atop the nest.

I think it can only mean that the owl was eating the squirrel as he slept in his bed. Which made me decide that if I ever have to choose between the Squirrel God and the Owl God, I will go with the Great Feathered Guy.