So I got this
Firstly before I go on I would like to point out to all I changed my title from Satanic pagan to Luciferian pagan witch.
I'll also provide the disclaimer I'm new to my beliefs. So there's a lot for me to learn and I'm constantly changing them as more info arrives. I am a pagan in the sense that my beliefs are very nature oriented. I worship 4 Norse deites Hel, Angrboda, Sigyn, and Loki. I am working to learn more about nature spirits to leave offerings to them. I've got a lot to learn about norse paganism but it seems I lean towards worshiping the Rökkr rather then the Æsir. The Rökkr are the norse deities associated with chaos, change, the underworld. They are primordial deities that are much "darker" then the Æsir. Loki is a god/goddess/deity who is associated with fire, chaos, mischief, madness among other things. Its hard to find info on both Angrboda and Sigyn both Loki's wives. Angrboda is associated with wolves and considered to be a fierce mother goddess by some. But she is wild and she's a mother goddess it's more like say Kali kinda vibes rather then say Virgin Mary. She's often called the hag of the iron woods that is she's associated with magick and witchcraft. Her name means Sorrowbringer according to some sources. Sigyn is Loki's other wife associated with loyalty and devotion. There's even less on her then on Angrboda. I wrote a poem about one of the only myths about her and posted here long time ago should anyone want to be tagged in it...she is associated with breaking incantations as well. Hel is the goddess of death. She is the mother of the sick and those of old age. Quite a wonderful goddess. She's associated with balance both chaos and order as she's depicted as duality, be she shown as half her face dark blue/black and half her face white or she's shown as half a corpse half living.
I do not believe in the myths however of any of my deities. They are lessons not fact and tell you about said deity.
I am Luciferian in the sense that I worship a Lucifer. Now everyone knows the Christian view of Lucifer that is associated with Satan. Theistic satanists and those who are luciferians who worship Satan do not agree with that view. They see him as a good guy. They believe Satan to be associated with freedom and such. Good things mostly. And Lucifer has been used to describe Christ as well. There's also a Roman deity called Lucifer. Lucifer just means morning star or lightbringer. It is a title not a name. So who is it I worship? Well at first I thought it was Satan. I associated him with freedom and independence a deity of knowledge at all costs. But now the more I research the less I don't know who it is I worship. There's so many beings with that name. I'm starting to feel it's just an aspect a light aspect that I worship and Lucifer has many forms but it's the same deity. Or maybe I'll just stick with one of of the beings who is called Lucifer probably the Roman one. Either way it's a deity of knowledge and light I honor. And as a Luciferian like many I focus on the Self. My practice centers around it. I honor and respect myself, and aim for improvement. I search for knowledge everywhere and seek to accept all parts including the ego, the Self, and the darker parts of my nature as well as the lighter halves of it. I don't know much about the self-worship aspect of many left handed paths but Im still learning about it and have considered making an altar to myself. Altars aren't just for worship but to represent and honor different things about a being. To work with them. Making an altar to myself is a way to say hey- I need to work on myself. I need to honor all parts of who I am. And improve myself seek knowledge. Keep in mind I don't see myself as a deity. But I am my own god in the sense I am the person I answer to above all else. I answer to no one but myself I may worship many deities but I do not serve them. I submit to myself and see myself as sacred as I am part of nature and nature is Divine.
I would be sore missed if I did not include a deeper insight on the importance balance and nature to me...this poem I wrote should explain it:
Title:Know Thyself
You say love and light.
Fear the dark.
You speak of Nature
As if she's solely a loving Mother.
When animals are prey to bigger foes.
You say to avoid the darker side
Of your nature.
Death is to be feared
Order over chaos!
I say Balance.
They who cannot hex
Cannot heal!
Cats wouldnt be so cute
Without their claws and sharp teeth.
Wolves are not strong
When they cannot hunt.
At the end of life:
Death is a comforting breath,
To end the pain suffering
Of the terminally sick.
Can you not feel the comfort?
Of the night?
See the moon and stars,
The shadows protect the secrets of all who walk in it.
No judgements,
Innocent lovers and corrupt thieves alike.
The coolness of the shade
In the hot sun
Is soo refreshing.
And life comes from:
The blood and pain of birth.
You cannot have one without the other.
Light without the darkness.
Too much order is just as bad as chaos.
Love has a twisted side
That can lead to grief.
And balance does not mean equal.
Some are darker then others...
Some are more into light then darkness...
I sit in the shadows...
I embrace light as well.
For I am both.
And this poem explains my journey from a Christian to where I am now...Imma bold a very important part of it
Title: Journey
I used to be a devoutee
Of the god of Abraham.
I'd often prayed
So deep I shake
And cry.
But some relationships
Aren't meant to last.
When I left
My identity was torn.
I was lost and broken.
Angry at Him who I once loved.
I've read the Bible
Several times
Took notes compared translations
I could quote verses...
I know young earth apologetics
Like the back of my hand.
I am no stranger to theology.
Still I am an apostate...
Cuz the Bible caused so many questions...
And some Christians Ive seen can be such hypocrites.
Always justifying outdated views
And the trauma they've been known to cause.
I can say
Christianity can be oh so beautiful
But because of the past
Such a shame I can't see it the way
Others do.
So I was sitting there
In my grief
When the goddess Hecate called
And I answered her.
She was there for just a blink of an eye
Long enough
To show me the gods exist.
So now I worship
4 Norse gods
I am into paganism and witchcraft.
Called by the Morning Star as well...
I seek self improvement
And knowledge
I walk my path alone
I would never seek to force
My beliefs on another
As a dark pagan
This path
Definitely is not for the faint of heart.
To understand hard truths
To seek that which is hidden
Deep in the mind
To unlock what you dont wish to admit
And find balance within oneself
Can be a double edge sword.
Anyway that's all...Any questions by anyone? Im willing to answer them as long as its respectful.
