RF Every day sexism

[HiddenDjinn]

Do they really say that?

Does it matter? Penumbra and dgirl have made it clear that any discussion of attractiveness of a woman among men at work would make them uncomfortable, regardless of context or whether the conversation was intended for or directed towards them.

 

[dgirl1986]

The problem with gender, is that heterosexual and homosexual people are sexist in their sexual attractions, so they will treat people differently based on their gender when it comes to sexual attraction. Thus, a topic of discussion appears where non would be had if they didnt felt sexually attracted to the new co worker.

It's easy, if they were asexual or homosexual this wouldnt happen. If they were all bisexual, this would happen with all co-workers.

Homosexuality and heterosexuality are sexist inherently (if we take sexism as treating people differently because of their sex ). Which is a bit funny in the context of this discussion.

...This is a large generalisation and seems way out of whack.

 

[HiddenDjinn]

There is actually.

Only in how violently you react to it.

 

[dgirl1986]

Does it matter? Penumbra and dgirl have made it clear that any discussion of attractiveness of a woman among men at work would make them uncomfortable, regardless of context or whether the conversation was intended for or directed towards them.

I have made it clear that the discussion in detail of a persons physical attributes, especially private ones, is wrong.

I have had men at my last job talking about me in a sexual way so I think I know what I am talking about...

 

[dgirl1986]

Only in how violently you react to it.

I do not see the point of responding to this.

 

[Me Myself]

No, it's more like, "we have new breasts- er I mean a new engineer today".

Was that the most "sexist" thing they said?

They dont find other co workers sexually relevant because they are heterosexual males and so are other co workers.

The same would happen in reverse if there were all women with a new co worker being male and they found him sexually relevant enough.

 

[HiddenDjinn]

I have made it clear that the discussion in detail of a persons physical attributes, especially private ones, is wrong.

I have had men at my last job talking about me in a sexual way so I think I know what I am talking about...

What you made clear is that your standard for what should or should not be allowed is based on your personal comfort level, and anyone else's comfort level should conform to yours, in your opinion.

 

[dgirl1986]

What you made clear is that your standard for what should or should not be allowed is based on your personal comfort level, and anyone else's comfort level should conform to yours, in your opinion.

Actually no. It is based on what most work places would employ as an appropriate code of conduct.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

I could not think of anything worse than people talking about and rating my appearance as a discussion point...the thought of work people talking about my girly bits makes me feel a bit ill.

You don't get it, if he thinks it's awesome you have too as well.

 

[Rakhel]

You don't get it, if he thinks it's awesome you have too as well.

And if she thinks it's horrible, he has to, as well.

 

[Poeticus]

And if she thinks it's horrible, he has to, as well.

Bingo.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

And if she thinks it's horrible, he has to, as well.

Or he could just respect that she felt uncomfortable as a new employee at a new work place and having her individual body parts rated from 1-10 like a product from amazon because she's a woman.
Only because he wouldn't mind a bunch of women doing that to him doesn't make penumbra's experience less valid.

 

[Rakhel]

Or he could just respect that she felt uncomfortable as a new employee at a new work place and having her individual body parts rated from 1-10 like a product from amazon because she's a woman.
Only because he wouldn't mind a bunch of women doing that to him doesn't make penumbra's experience less valid.

and my statement stands. If she thinks its horrible, he must as well.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

and my statement stands. If she thinks its horrible, he must as well.

No he doesn't have to think its horrible when done to him, but he should respect how penumbra felt in that situation.

 

[Rakhel]

No he doesn't have to think its horrible when done to him, but he should respect how penumbra felt in that situation.

You're not following. But that's okay. I will spell it out for you
If she thinks it's horrible that it was done to her then he has to agree.
That is what you were saying when you said

You don't get it, if he thinks it's awesome you have too as well

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

You're not following. But that's okay. I will spell it out for you
If she thinks it's horrible that it was done to her then he has to agree.
That is what you were saying when you said

No but he could back off of try to be a bit more understanding

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I thought this was a discussion thread. No debate is allowed in discussion threads, and yet I see a debate here that has been going on for several pages now.

I would suggest that if a debate were to continue to start a new thread discussing whether or not a situation similar to Penumbras workplace experience is considered sexist.

 

[Rakhel]

A study was conducted in Italy on Ambivalent Sexism. I found the below rather interesting

Men consider the hostile source less positively and more sexist than the benevolent source, while women show the opposite pattern.
http://www.uv.es/garzon/psicologia politica/N44-4.pdf

I'm not done with the paper. yet but thought it fit here.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

A study was conducted in Italy on Ambivalent Sexism. I found the below rather interesting

I'm not done with the paper. yet but thought it fit here.
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I think the study is certainly relevant to the discussion, and the variances of perceptions of both men and women when receiving messages of both hostile sexism and benevolent sexism. One can share "nice" sexism (women need protection from men because women are "pure")...or one can share "hostile" sexism (all men are pigs)....and it was interesting to see the results of how women and men receive those variances.

 

[Rakhel]

I think it's also important to note that sexism will continue to exist. There is no way to rid ourselves of it. The best we can do is recognize that we all, men and women, are both victim and perpetrator of sexism,and make some attempt to lessen the damage that we all commit.