Today is your lucky day! Today is the day you meet Satan and he (or her or it or them) says:
"you are a contemptible and inferior life form who I will enjoy tormenting for eternity for all the guilty pleasures you did when you thought no one was looking. But it's amusing to watch you egotistical insects scurry around like anything you do really matters. I'm feeling generous today and I need some entertainment. you can have one wish to satisfy your hearts deepest and darkest desire.. And it's on the house..."
What would is be?
(And, if only for the forum rules, try to keep it legal.
).
