I have found kids who are spanked are no more likely to pay attention or to be well-behaved than kids who are not spanked.
Most often, the parents who discover their kids did not behave well in class who tended to lose their own self-control in public were the ones who spanked.
As a child, I was hit, kicked, and belted by my father, and the only result was that I feared for my life around him. My brother used to lock himself in his room with a knife when my dad would lose his temper. Nobody knew when he would be mad, and what he was angry at always changed depending on if he had a bad day.
My mother spanked me less than a handful of times. It was never from punishment, was only a couple of smacks on the bum with her open hand, and was only done when she lost her temper and didn't know what else to do. Completely ineffective.
Eventually my dad laid off me when he raised his hand to smack me when I was 15, and I stared at him without fear.
My mom eventually stopped hitting when she discovered natural consequences and leading by example are the most effective way of parenting. AND, she found ways to manage her stress better.
My own kids respond best to reason. By far - far and away - it's better than reactive parenting. When I teach, I am clear about the rules of participation, and if those rules aren't followed, a simple reminder about the rules, and then they aren't allowed to participate. It works beautifully.
When I was growing up, a teacher used to lock her door to dance class if people were late. Even if they were late one minute, she locked the door the minute class started. People learned very quickly to be in class ready to go once the clock was on the hour. She never yelled, threatened, or physically grabbed any kids to get into class. She never even gave a warning. She simply closed the door and locked it on the hour.
Very very effective.
The overwhelming majority of studies on the effects of spanking suggest that it's ineffective at best, and abusive at worst. Parents are allowed to be ineffective and make mistakes, and I live in a culture where spanking is normalized. But to suggest that spanking is integral to parenting is something I argue against.
It's like telling parents who think it's vital to let a baby cry it out for sleep training, or "they'll never have good sleep habits"....that's a myth. Though those folks will never be convinced that kids develop into circadian rhythms of sleep on their own while they are still developing physically.
People will cling to the myth that spanking is a must until parents get the guts to refrain from it. Then they discover it isn't as necessary as they and their family once thought.
