Star Wars, Episode VII - Caution! Spoilers

[BSM1]

You forgot Spaceballs...
Just saying

I was going to bring this up but I was afraid this fine piece of cinematic art would be subject to ridicule from the great unwashed that frequent this forum.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

I hope we find out Kylo and Rey's midichlorian counts in the next movie.

 

[chevron1]

Why does he wear the mask? Does he become severely injured sometime during the film? Or is it some sort of warrior armor of the knights of Ren?

he looks like a dog, an evil dog. Or maybe a baboon, a malevolent baboon.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

he looks like a dog, an evil dog. Or maybe a baboon, a malevolent baboon.

And not to mention he has the world's most utterly useless cross guard ever seen on any sort of sword-type of weapon. And what's up with the non-straight beams of light, anyways?

 

[-Peacemaker-]

what a lousy movie. How many times are they going to blow up the death star? The movie would've been entertaining if it had been the first of the saga but we've seen this story before. It was a mistake to let JJ Abrams take it over. All he did was make some unoriginal blockbuster that the casual fan will eat up. He did absolutely nothing to further the story of the star wars universe, to make his own mark on it. This was like a greatest hits album

 

[Shadow Wolf]

I was going to bring this up but I was afraid this fine piece of cinematic art would be subject to ridicule from the great unwashed that frequent this forum.

I have to admit Space Balls isn't my favorite Mel Brooks movie, but it's still above casual ridicule, and even his special touch of parody and nonsensical satire would have made for a better Star Wars movie than Abrams crapped out onto the world.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

I think we need a whitehouse.gov petition demanding Abrams never be allowed to touch a classic sci-fi franchise ever again.

 

[fantome profane]

I just have one question about this movie, and it has been driving me nuts since ever since I saw it. Fifty thousand galactic standard credits to whoever can explain this mystery to me.

How did he get back up the stairs?


(think about it)

 

[Adramelek]

As an aside; Dark Helmet in Spaceballs liked to play with dolls.

 

[Jonathan Ainsley Bain]

So my nephew sees the movie.
In trepidation, I cynically wonder what is possibly the WORST thing they could do to it.
I shudder.
They couldn't possibly be so lame as to blow up the death star AGAIN could they?

So I say to my nephew:
"Did they blow up the death star again?"

"Yes, but it was bigger this time."

I cannot believe that I guessed the plot based on what I reckoned was the worst possible plot.

I'll wait for it to come out on TV.

 

[Revoltingest]

he looks like a dog, an evil dog. Or maybe a baboon, a malevolent baboon.

A malevilent dogoon?

 

[beenherebeforeagain]

I just have one question about this movie, and it has been driving me nuts since ever since I saw it. Fifty thousand galactic standard credits to whoever can explain this mystery to me.

How did he get back up the stairs?


(think about it)

I think there was one scene that showed it, but you had to look carefully: little metallic arms reached out to the wall, floor, etc., going both up and down. Notice they have never shown how R2D2 gets up and down stairs...

 

[beenherebeforeagain]

Very interesting. Last questions, as I am going to see the film this weekend. Does Kylo Ren begin as sort of a good guy in the beginning but eventually turns to the Dark Side and becomes a disciple of Darth Vader's legacy of hunting down and destroying potential Jedi knights?

Whatever happened occurred before the events of this episode. There's a lot of backstory to be filled in...Apparently he did something of an Anakin on his fellow Jedi-in-training, which led to Luke leaving...

 

[Adramelek]

I have heard good and bad takes on the "Force Awakens". I have been a fan of Star Wars ever since Episode IV in 1977. I became an instant fan of Darth Vader when he first emerged and surveyed the death and mayhem of the battle between the storm troopers and rebel soldiers. And held that guy up by the neck demanding answers to his questions about the stolen Death Star schematics. Darth Vader was my childhood hero from age 7 to about 11. Then I discovered girls.

 

[Adramelek]

​

 

[Akivah]

If the movie was a stand alone, then I would have said that it was great. However, it is part of a nine part series. I found it almost the exact same as the original Star Wars movie. Almost every plot line was identical, no creativity. I felt like they just opened up the storage from the original movie and said "let's save on money and re-use all the old props."

I did like the additional attention paid to the Stormtroopers as people, but I would have liked some background on why this one Stormtrooper turned. Is he a trend or an anomaly? I did like the new heroine. To me it seems obvious that she will be revealed as being Luke's daughter. He was the family that abandoned her on a desert planet (just like Luke came from) for her own safety.

Three other points: One. It seems like they train Stormtroopers to be bad shots. They didn't hit a single target in the entire movie. Two. I feel bad for Mark Hamill. He was the main plot point for the movie, but didn't get a single speaking line. Again, probably to save on money. Non-speaking actors don't get paid as well as speaking actors. Three. C-3PO is even more useless than before. Many humans now understand the beeps & chirps from the useful droids, so they don't need C-3PO to translate for them anymore.

 

[Adramelek]

I am sure that when I see "The Force Awakens" episode VII and if I like it, all criticism of it will hold no meaning for me. I detested episodes I - III. "A New Hope" IV and " The Empire Strikes Back" V are currently my favorites.

 

[Adramelek]

Ok folks as a think about it, If I was Kylo Ren, a being sensitive to the powers of the force with a fascination with the dark side, and learned that my grandfather was a great Dark Lord of the Sith, for sure as hell I would seek after his legacy and the power of the dark side. I would also seek to emulate, in my own way, his dark countenance. But that is just me.

 

[Willamena]

So my nephew sees the movie.
In trepidation, I cynically wonder what is possibly the WORST thing they could do to it.
I shudder.
They couldn't possibly be so lame as to blow up the death star AGAIN could they?

So I say to my nephew:
"Did they blow up the death star again?"

"Yes, but it was bigger this time."

I cannot believe that I guessed the plot based on what I reckoned was the worst possible plot.

I'll wait for it to come out on TV.

They made a blatant point of emulating a number of elements from the first movie, as if affirming the truism that nothing ever changes.

 

[David1967]

I waited till the crowds thinned down and went to see it last night. It was good but not as good as I was told to expect. The action scenes were good ,especially the dog fights between the X wings and tie fighters. But the main bad guy seated on a throne looked like a cartoon (strangely like the white orc on the Hobbit, Hmm. still wondering where bugs bunny was.) And the Character of Han Solos boy gone bad had to be the most disappointing bad guy the franchise ever produced. And when he removed the mask??? Seriously, is that the best they could come up with. And the light saber battles were atrocious ,nothing like in episode one where I was enthralled by the skills of Darth maul and the Jedis. Killing off Han solo? Unforgivable. On a good note there were no cutesy characters like ewoks or Jar Jar Binks to suffer through. But again the bad guy team of spoiled child with light saber and cartoon giant on throne. Please. just take the kids batteries out of his build it yourself light saber kit and send him to his room.
OK, I asked for it, let the hate begin..