'The birds and the bees' talk

[Lady Crimson]

For those of you who are parents , did you ever talk to your kids about 'the birds and the bees'?...and if so, how did they react...and at what age did you talk to them?...just curios.

And for the parents of younger children...are you planning to talk to them at some time about this specific subject?

 

[michel]

There was a thread on this some while back; I can't remember who said it, but I remember someone posting that his Father had told his son that he needed to have a conversation about sex matters, and the son said "O.K Dad, what do you want to know?"............

We waited fpr our children ask us questions, and gave them the answers. We never felt the need to make an issue of it, but we were always completely frank and factual with them.

 

[Original Freak]

There was a thread on this some while back; I can't remember who said it, but I remember someone posting that his Father had told his son that he needed to have a conversation about sex matters, and the son said "O.K Dad, what do you want to know?"............

We waited fpr our children ask us questions, and gave them the answers. We never felt the need to make an issue of it, but we were always completely frank and factual with them.

That was me...I had a good sex education in school. I know that at 16 I knew more about STD's and safe sex than he did.

My son is 6, daughter 4 and I answer any question they ask honestly. I avoid the actuall, how to have sex thing, and will until they are old enough to understand that you don't until you are ready, and what it takes to be ready. Last night during bath time my son asked why he has 'balls'. I told him he had 'testicles' to help make babies when he was a grown up. He laughed and told me girls had babies. I then told him it takes a man an women to make a baby but the girls have the babies.

 

[Lady Crimson]

I never asked my parents that sort of questions...i don't intend to either.

My son is 6, daughter 4 and I answer any question they ask honestly. I avoid the actuall, how to have sex thing, and will until they are old enough to understand that you don't until you are ready, and what it takes to be ready. Last night during bath time my son asked why he has 'balls'. I told him he had 'testicles' to help make babies when he was a grown up. He laughed and told me girls had babies. I then told him it takes a man an women to make a baby but the girls have the babies.

Complex...:areyoucra

There was a thread on this some while back; I can't remember who said it, but I remember someone posting that his Father had told his son that he needed to have a conversation about sex matters, and the son said "O.K Dad, what do you want to know?"............

Hehe...good one!

 

[fromthe heart]

When my children started getting curious about where babies come from I handled it almost like a lesson I science of the human anatomy. I used my medical books to show the proper parts listed with proper names and I gotta tell you at first I think we were all feeling a bit embarrassed but you can't let on about that as a parent or your child starts to think there is something about their bodies to be ashamed of. I know this is a little odd for some but I told them how God made our bodies so perfect that they fit together in such a way that the end result is a child that the mommy carries the child ,showed them the stages of pregnancy,how the birth of a baby occurs and why it's important to never bring a child into the world unless you know how you plan to provide for the child for the next 18-21 years of YOUR life. As we discussed it we all relaxed some and it took on a whole bond of sorts of it's self...my children have always come to me when they wanted the truth about something before they would even believe a friend. I never used a stork, a cabbage patch or any folk-lore ways to discuss things of this serious of a nature. My children were the ones their frineds went to for truth in something as I knew would happen from my own youth. This is why I felt it's so important to give them ALL the details in truth. It's tough to do too because it's hard to get into sex with your kids (you feel almost like you'd prefer to run across a bed of hot coals than get into that subject)...but honesty is best. There are stages to doing it all as well, it has to be age appropriate and on a level of pure understanding. If they look puzzled you must say that by their expression you feel they don't quite understand something and it's ok to ask a question of you that they might feel is lame because if it isn't understood you leave them open to becoming misinformed elsewhere.


You also must tell your kids about trickery used in relationships as well...birth control supposedly being used, can't concieve unlesses, and all the things that lead to children becoming parents accidentially. It's not a subject you can take on lightly so when your child starts asking questions you tell them we will set aside a special time to discuss this and prepare yourself well...then have the discussion openly and frankly....don't drag your feet about it because if they are curious dragging your feet sends them a signal that you aren't interested in their concerns and they will look for answers elsewhere and you REALLY don't want that.

All parents have an obligation to have 'the talk' with their kids as soon as age permits...not to do so is just being irresponsible as a parent. I never felt these things have been handled properly in the school system because it's a very personal thing and a special thing to share with your child. Not all kids understand at the same rate another will so parents should set the example of the when and where for this information and it's always best to tell your kids what your belief system is during the discussion as well about what you feel you expect of them as YOUR children about having children. Mine knew I expected them to be married at LEAST one year before starting their family....longer if they weren't financially prepared to do so. I don't ever pull punches with my kids...it's just not worth it. I expect they will use what they learned from my parenting to pass on in their own childrens life. I've already been asked questions by my kids as to things that are normal kid curosity about sexuality when the first grandchild started to be curious about body parts. It all begins from such an early age in the process leading up to 'the talk'...gotta tell you I'm glad I didn't screw that up cuz I sure made my share of mistakes as a parent and I pray for them to learn from my mistakes and come out further ahead.

 

[Original Freak]

but you can't let on about that as a parent or your child starts to think there is something about their bodies to be ashamed of.

Right on.

how the birth of a baby occurs and why it's important to never bring a child into the world unless you know how you plan to provide for the child for the next 18-21 years of YOUR life.

Great point.

It's tough to do too because it's hard to get into sex with your kids (you feel almost like you'd prefer to run across a bed of hot coals than get into that subject)...but honesty is best.

Probably could have been phrased better but true non the less

You also must tell your kids about trickery used in relationships as well...birth control supposedly being used, can't concieve unlesses, and all the things that lead to children becoming parents accidentially. It's not a subject you can take on lightly so when your child starts asking questions you tell them we will set aside a special time to discuss this and prepare yourself well...then have the discussion openly and frankly....don't drag your feet about it because if they are curious dragging your feet sends them a signal that you aren't interested in their concerns and they will look for answers elsewhere and you REALLY don't want that.

So far everthing you've said has been a good point (although I don't imagine I'll be saying the "god made us perfect" part.

I never felt these things have been handled properly in the school system because it's a very personal thing and a special thing to share with your child.

Hey, something I disagree with...but not the thread for it.:tsk:

Mine knew I expected them to be married at LEAST one year before starting their family....longer if they weren't financially prepared to do so

Well to each their own I suppose. My oldes was 5 when he was the ring bearer at our wedding.