The last post is the WINNER!

[Wirey]

I wonder if Elvis ever thought "Man, I wonder if I'll die while I'm taking a dump?"

 

[Stevicus]

The 9 Most Famous People To Have Died On The Toilet

We all know that the Queen poos (unlike Prince Philip, who vents clouds of highly-acidic faecal gas from a fleshy nozzle just beneath his chin, before blinking his inner eyelids and retreating to t…

nathanieltapley.com

9. Elvis Presley – Although one of the most famous to die in their bathrooms, Elvis wasn’t found on his toilet. He was several feet away from the toilet, where he had apparently crawled in an attempt to get help, interrupted whilst using the toilet. He was obese, and suffered from glaucoma, high blood pressure, liver damage, had a history of abusing prescription drugs, and an enlarged colon. One of his coroners said he had ‘the arteries of an eighty-year old‘. Although there is some dispute over whether it was the massive drug intake, the weight, or the actual ‘straining at stool’ (as his biographer puts it) that caused his heart attack, the moral remains the same: you can’t have too much fibre in your diets, kids.

8. Evelyn Waugh – the ‘bright young thing’ of the 1920s, and later Catholic propagandist came home from church one Sunday, went to the loo, and never came out again. He ascended to the Heavenly Throne whilst mounted on his.

7. Catherine the Great – Catherine the Great is perhaps the only person in history about whom it can be said the best version of the story of their death is the one where they die, grunting on the toilet. Because in the other popular version of the Catherine the Great’s death she was crushed to death by a horse during the act of coitus.

6. Uesugi Kenshin – Kenshin was one of the most powerful Japanese warlords of the sixteenth century with a prodigious capacity for booze. Although most people agree that he died on the toilet, there’s a lot of dispute over whether it was his prodigious drinking, or a cesspit-dwelling ninja that finally got him. I like to imagine a combination of the two. A booze-addled bum-ninja.

5. Christopher Shale – Not hugely famous in and of himself, Shale is notable for two things: being David Cameron’s constituency aide, and dying in a toilet at the Glastonbury Festival. In one move he managed to replace the popular image of Tories as being tangerine-chomping auto-erotic asphyxiators, start rumours about shadowy conspiracies and leaked documents, and get everyone to agree that people over 50 should not attend music festivals.

4. Edmund Ironsides – Stabbed in the anus by a Viking hiding in his toilet. There is literally nothing about that last sentence I don’t like.

3. Don Simpson – A heart attack waiting to happen, Top Gun Producer, S&M enthusiast and allegedly prodigious drug user Don Simpson died on the toilet, whilst reading a biography of Oliver Stone. Death must have come as a blessed relief.

2. King George II – Fat, palsied German George II was blind in one eye and hard of hearing by 1760, when he had a cup of hot chocolate and went to the loo. A few moments later a crash was heard, and the king was pronounced dead from ‘overexertions on the privy’.

1. Lenny Bruce – Lenny Bruce didn’t just die on a toilet, he died doing heroin on a toilet. Imagine being so in love with heroin that you don’t even want to finish taking a dump before getting high. “You know, I could wait, like, three minutes and then do this on the sofa. Nah, what’s the worst that can- urk!”

So, what has this litany of poo-related perishing taught us? What have we learned from these salutary tales? One thing. Toilets can kill you.

Never, ever go to the toilet. That is all.

The worst one was "Stabbed in the anus by a Viking hiding in his toilet." That's just awful.

 

[Wu Wei]

The 9 Most Famous People To Have Died On The Toilet

We all know that the Queen poos (unlike Prince Philip, who vents clouds of highly-acidic faecal gas from a fleshy nozzle just beneath his chin, before blinking his inner eyelids and retreating to t…

nathanieltapley.com

The worst one was "Stabbed in the anus by a Viking hiding in his toilet." That's just awful.

my ex-wife absolutely 100% believed the other story about the death of Catherine the Great

 

[Stevicus]

 

[Stonetree]

Good Morning here in NJ. It is Tuesday,
but I'm still doing Monday......So a Monday
WIN on Tuesday is in the Book of Religious Forums!

 

[JustGeorge]

Good Morning here in NJ. It is Tuesday,
but I'm still doing Monday......So a Monday
WIN on Tuesday is in the Book of Religious Forums!

Well, it depends on the culture.

In some societies, its not considered the 'next day' until sunrise.

 

[sun rise]

Well, it depends on the culture.

In some societies, its not considered the 'next day' until sunrise.

Until @sun rise says it is.

 

[John53]

Stormy afternoon

 

[ChristineM]

Sunrise has been and gone, it's definitely a Tuesday win. Good morning

 

[ChristineM]

No royalty title of Queen in China, no king either for that matter. Empress and Emperor

Yes, i know, im blaming Google for dishing out false information.

 

[ChristineM]

• While the title of king is primarily political, the title of emperor often makes one the head of the religion too. While a King rules one fairly homogenous territory (called a nation or kingdom), emperors often wield power over a fairly heterogeneous territory (ruler of many nations).

Kings and queens of great Britain and it's territories are head of the church England.

 

[Stevicus]

 

[We Never Know]

No royalty title of Queen in China, no king either for that matter. Empress and Emperor

Blame it on google.

It gives both queen and empress to the same chinese spelling

 

[ChristineM]

Blame it on google.

It gives both queen and empress to the same chinese spelling

View attachment 91072

View attachment 91073

I do blame Google

Perhaps the AI sees queen and empress as the same thing

 

[JustGeorge]

There is a brown cat at the door.

I thought it was Cub, and opened the door, but it is not Cub.

He's friendly. Skinny, and hungry. Obviously not feral, but looks like he's been missing for a bit.

 

[Wu Wei]

Yes, i know, im blaming Google for dishing out false information.

Google translate use to be hilarious. Some of the Chinese translations in the early days of Google Translate were comedy gold. It has gotten much better than it use to be. But I still recommend if you are translating from English to Chinese, once you get the Chinese for what you are trying to say, translate that back to English, generally it is fine, but on occasion it is WAY off. Once had a coworker try that as a joke and send me an email, Google translated it, and he thought he was calling me a Jerk in Chinese. When I showed it to Mrs Wu, she asked why is he calling you a rapist.
Google translated it VERY wrong. To this day I have not yet let him forget that

 

[Wu Wei]

There is a brown cat at the door.

I thought it was Cub, and opened the door, but it is not Cub.

He's friendly. Skinny, and hungry. Obviously not feral, but looks like he's been missing for a bit.

Don't let it fool you...its a cat.... so it is.....

 

[Wu Wei]

Blame it on google.

It gives both queen and empress to the same chinese spelling

View attachment 91072

View attachment 91073

I do blame google.... but it is much MUCH better than it was when it first appeared on the scene

 

[JustGeorge]

Don't let it fool you...its a cat.... so it is.....

Its okay. We're all evil here.

 

[sun rise]

There is a brown cat at the door.

I thought it was Cub, and opened the door, but it is not Cub.

He's friendly. Skinny, and hungry. Obviously not feral, but looks like he's been missing for a bit.

And so he came to "Chaos Manor" for sustenance. (with a nod to Jerry Pournelle)