The pointlessness of marriage?

[nnmartin]

Marriage seems to be a pointless, outmoded idea and should be done away with.

Why do I think this?

This is because the conception of the marriage idea revolves around having children.

Young couples without children tend not too last very long as the biological purpose of love is not being fulfilled. This leads to infidelity and divorce.

So, if we allow divorce then why bother getting married in the first place?

If you are not likely to have children together then why get married in the first place?

The Natural function of love is procreation - it's other meanings are purely idealistic and we all see how this 'fades' away over time, unless of course there are children to perpetuate its substance.

So the proposal is to abolish marriage except for those that have children together, in which case the marriage can occur shortly after the first birth.

This seems like the most sensible option. (all other couples may have some kind of minor civil union type arrangement if necessary)

 

[Kathryn]

My question for you is this - why do you think your opinions about marriage should result in other people being denied the right to be married?

 

[nnmartin]

I am basing my opinions on the natural biology and psychology of mankind so that gives them a high level of validity.

 

[Kathryn]

I am basing my opinions on the natural biology and psychology of mankind so that gives them a high level of validity.

So you think that your opinion gives you the right to deny others the option to get married?

 

[nnmartin]

what is the point of getting married if you do not want or cannot have children?

 

[Gjallarhorn]

what is the point of getting married if you do not want or cannot have children?

Benefits.

 

[Kathryn]

what is the point of getting married if you do not want or cannot have children?

Confidence in moral beliefs. The trust and joy associated with confirming those jointly held beliefs with another person who places the same level of importance in those beliefs, and that level of commitment expressed in the legal and spiritual ceremony and life of a marriage.

Family joy, celebration, approval and support.

Not to mention great photos and a fun reception - and vacation!

 

[nnmartin]

Gjallarhorn:

benefits - yes, that is one of the points I am making.

Marriage in this case is only one of financial convenience so is nothing other than a sham - hence it should be abolished.

 

[Gjallarhorn]

Gjallarhorn:

benefits - yes, that is one of the points I am making.

Marriage in this case is only one of financial convenience so is nothing other than a sham - hence it should be abolished.

Why is it a sham? Because you believe marriage is about children?

 

[nnmartin]

Confidence in moral beliefs. The trust and joy associated with confirming those jointly held beliefs with another person who places the same level of importance in those beliefs, and that level of commitment expressed in the legal and spiritual ceremony and life of a marriage.

Now that sounds great in a general spiritual manner but how can something as esoteric as that really have any place in law?

(and I'm not talking about religious weddings here)

Family joy, celebration, approval and support.

Not to mention great photos and a fun reception - and vacation!

The same applies here. Why should we need a piece of paper to attain our family's support and joy anyway?

 

[nnmartin]

Why is it a sham? Because you believe marriage is about children?

Of course marriage is about children.

What else could a be about, bearing in mind that love is a transient emotion.

 

[Gjallarhorn]

Of course marriage is about children.

What else could a be about, bearing in mind that love is a transient emotion.

...bearing in mind all is transient, why bathe? Why eat? Why speak?

 

[Kathryn]

Now that sounds great in a general spiritual manner but how can something as esoteric as that really have any place in law?

Maybe you should be asking gay couples this question.

The same applies here. Why should we need a piece of paper to attain our family's support and joy anyway?

Silly. It's not the actual piece of paper that brings anyone any joy. Paper is boring. Documents are not much fun.

It's what the paper symbolizes - which I already expounded upon in my earlier post.

 

[zenzero]

Friend nnmartin,

The pointlessness of marriage?

Again a perception which can have an equally opposite perception like friend Kathyrn's

Personally take it as an individual's choice and call. If we live in a society we either follow it or change it. Changing requires majority which again can never happen fast.
Under the given circumstances have opted to remain single to be free of all such obligations besides being asexual contributes to the philosophy.

Love & rgds

 

[nnmartin]

having children is what tends to keep the flame of love alive in a marriage - it is a biological instinct at work here.

So without children, we don't need marriage as in this case it would just be an idealistic wish to artificially perpetuate our fading love for each other.

so, much easier to do away with it entirely for all childless couples, and let free love reign supreme.

 

[Gjallarhorn]

having children is what tends to keep the flame of love alive in a marriage - it is a biological instinct at work here.

So without children, we don't need marriage as in this case it would just be an idealistic wish to artificially perpetuate our fading love for each other.

so, much easier to do away with it entirely for all childless couples, and let free love reign supreme.

Until you can show that marriage is only about children, your argument is empty.

 

[Kathryn]

having children is what tends to keep the flame of love alive in a marriage - it is a biological instinct at work here.

So without children, we don't need marriage as in this case it would just be an idealistic wish to artificially perpetuate our fading love for each other.

so, much easier to do away with it entirely for all childless couples, and let free love reign supreme.

My husband and I have no children together and never will. Our kids were grown before we met and got married.

We chose to get married knowing we would never have children together. Of course we could have just moved in together, but we voluntarily chose to get married.

What right would you ever have to deny us that choice?

By the way, our love is not fading - it grows deeper and more fulfilling each year. We are absolutely crazy about each other and there is literally not a day that goes by that we don't remind each other of how blessed and lucky we are to be married to each other.

So - don't get married if you don't want to. I wouldn't dream of forcing that on you. But likewise, don't call for the abolition of marriage. Don't deny others the right to choose what structure they desire for their relationship with their mate of choice.

 

[Penumbra]

Legally, I think people should be able to make most forms of contracts to exchange benefits and such.

And then culturally, if people want to go through traditions that have meaning to them, then they should be able to do so without government intervention or involvement.

 

[Kathryn]

Legally, I think people should be able to make most forms of contracts to exchange benefits and such.

And then culturally, if people want to go through traditions that have meaning to them, then they should be able to do so without government intervention or involvement.

Right on. Did you know that the Puritans were against government controlled marriage contracts? They believed that marriage was a spiritual sacrament, not a state ordained right, and they were only in support of civil unions for state purposes.

 

[atanu]

An ant and an elephant married. The lovemaking was so passionte and violent that the elephant died in the morning. Ant, while digging the grave sighed "One night of passion and life long drudgery".

Just joking.