The Random, Meaningless Announcements Thread 3!

[Shadow Wolf]

I'm trying to write a song. I made a decent drum track, if I say so myself considering I've gotten to drum two, maybe three times. I also made a good sounding guitar riff.
They go together as well as a cat and a bucket of water.

 

[sun rise]

So, you are a genius?

More likely a good guesser.

 

[Wu Wei]

Bagel with a chicken patty..... yummy

 

[DavidFirth]

Bagel with a chicken patty..... yummy

Wrong thread, silly bear.

 

[Wu Wei]

Wrong thread, silly bear.

Nu uh...it was random and meaningless.... now if I finished that by calling you a rusty old bridge...THEN it would be the wrong thread

 

[Shadow Wolf]

I need to become very ill and very contagious tomorrow, be in excruciating agony Thursday, and then feel completely better Friday.
I hate Thanksgiving, and this year it's going to include my sister and who dumb **** husband who have a habit of getting passive aggressive ****ty towards me with their "secularophobe" preaching, their horde of ill-behaved, loud, and obnoxious kids, and my dad's redneck hick jail bird of a family (that although my mom kept me away from them when I was younger she know expects me to be friendly towards and says "they're your family" and I'm like "so what? they go a day without saying "whoop that ***" and acting like the honkies they are then I might consider maybe having a moment to reconsider: On that note, do we really not have any better racial slurs towards white people than honky or cracker?)

 

[Shadow Wolf]

One thing I don't think I'll ever understand about prayer, is how people thank god for food, but never/rarely offer up thanks to those who farmed the food, shipped and packed, stocked and sold, and cooked the food. They thank god for health and healing, but don't offer up thanks to the doctors and nurses who spent years and probably sunk themselves deep in student loan debt to study and learn how to provide that healing. God just seems to get way too much credit for stuff he didn't do.

 

[Revoltingest]

I need to become very ill and very contagious tomorrow, be in excruciating agony Thursday, and then feel completely better Friday.
I hate Thanksgiving, and this year it's going to include my sister and who dumb **** husband who have a habit of getting passive aggressive ****ty towards me with their "secularophobe" preaching, their horde of ill-behaved, loud, and obnoxious kids, and my dad's redneck hick jail bird of a family (that although my mom kept me away from them when I was younger she know expects me to be friendly towards and says "they're your family" and I'm like "so what? they go a day without saying "whoop that ***" and acting like the honkies they are then I might consider maybe having a moment to reconsider: On that note, do we really not have any better racial slurs towards white people than honky or cracker?)

A possibly useful recommendation....
Treat their attacks as an opportunity for subtle & sly mischief.
Consider likely snark, & plan possible comebacks.
Perhaps you'll occasionally leave some in in the family thinking....

But use this fell power with discretion, & only when most effective.
The rest of the time, be cool & aloof, letting them know that your feathers do not ruffle.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

A possibly useful recommendation....
Treat their attacks as an opportunity for subtle & sly mischief.

We're already far beyond the point of subtle and sly. We crossed the "dude, what the ****?" line a year or two ago when her husband was rambling on about the immorality and purposeless and misguided and warped views of those who don't believe in god.
My dad's family, even after the "mom embargo" was lifted, they showed no interest in me and didn't take any notice of me until they learned I'm really smart and on the path to making lots of money, and they used to mooch off my dad, who himself made lots of money during his 20-some years at Chrysler.
And if anyone has the gall to ask me to lead in saying grace, I already have a short Satanic prayer planned out, about freedom from religious shackles, thanking those who actually worked to move from food along from farm to table, and ending it with nominie dei nostri Satanas luciferi exelci.
And god I'm gonna ****ing loose it if the NFL kneeling thing is brought up (it's something my dad likes to bring up - something I tried to explain that him wanting to watch just to change the channel if they do it is no different than me going to a Focus on the Family meeting just to walk out when they start spewing anti-LBGT rhetoric; the fact the players have a Constitutional right to do so is something not many want to hear).

 

[Shadow Wolf]

At leas there will be one person there who is cool, the son of a family friend who became a family friend himself, and I've never had any quarrels with him.

 

[Revoltingest]

We're already far beyond the point of subtle and sly. We crossed the "dude, what the ****?" line a year or two ago when her husband was rambling on about the immorality and purposeless and misguided and warped views of those who don't believe in god.
My dad's family, even after the "mom embargo" was lifted, they showed no interest in me and didn't take any notice of me until they learned I'm really smart and on the path to making lots of money, and they used to mooch off my dad, who himself made lots of money during his 20-some years at Chrysler.
And if anyone has the gall to ask me to lead in saying grace, I already have a short Satanic prayer planned out, about freedom from religious shackles, thanking those who actually worked to move from food along from farm to table, and ending it with nominie dei nostri Satanas luciferi exelci.
And god I'm gonna ****ing loose it if the NFL kneeling thing is brought up (it's something my dad likes to bring up - something I tried to explain that him wanting to watch just to change the channel if they do it is no different than me going to a Focus on the Family meeting just to walk out when they start spewing anti-LBGT rhetoric; the fact the players have a Constitutional right to do so is something not many want to hear).

Here's hoping that at least you get a drumstick.

 

[DavidFirth]

Nu uh...it was random and meaningless.... now if I finished that by calling you a rusty old bridge...THEN it would be the wrong thread

Oh, be quiet and go hibernate for the winter.

 

[sun rise]

Too bad I don't know someone named Bernate so I could say "Hi Bernate".

 

[Revoltingest]

Too bad I don't know someone named Bernate so I could say "Hi Bernate".

I've been waiting all my life for someone to set me up with this question & answer....
"Ubangi"
"You betchie!"

 

[Wu Wei]

No, no, no, no! Come, let's away to prison: We two alone will sing like birds i' the cage: When thou dost ask me blessing, I'll kneel down, And ask of thee forgiveness: so we'll live, And pray, and sing, and tell old tales, and laugh At gilded butterflies, and hear poor rogues Talk of court news; and we'll talk with them too, Who loses and who wins; who's in, who's out; And take upon's the mystery of things, As if we were God's spies: and we'll wear out, In a wall'd prison, packs and sects of great ones, That ebb and flow by the moon.

 

[DavidFirth]

You guys are Shakespearing me out.

 

[sun rise]

You guys are Shakespearing me out.

You should complain in the Shakes-and-bakes thread unless you're trying to avoid the heat of the kitchen. Knowest thou, that nothing you post in the wrong place will pan out. You might even find some becoming frosted.

 

[DavidFirth]

You should complain in the Shakes-and-bakes thread unless you're trying to avoid the heat of the kitchen. Knowest thou, that nothing you post in the wrong place will pan out. You might even find some becoming frosted.

You'd best be careful else I'll throw some Homer at you.

 

[Wu Wei]

Silence is the perfectest herault of joy. I were but little happy if I could say how much

 

[Revoltingest]

You'd best be careful else I'll throw some Homer at you.