Weeds, weeds and more weeds... HELP!

[YmirGF]

Myself and the other grounds keeper have been fighting the encroaching "weed hoards" for the last several days. It is a particularly nasty spring and I am confident that this rash of horrid weeds is the result of "climate change" and "global warning". If any accomplished gardeners can give tips on how we can rid ourselves of these horrid creations, we will be forever in your debt... and forever is a very long time.

I am including about a dozen images of this nasty infestation, so forgive the page crawl.

Exhibit 1: A particularly nasty blighter. Just look at it. *shiver*

Exhibit 2: The invasion of the 2nd bird bath. (These things are so sneaky.)

Exhibit 3: The over-running of the raised bed section

Exhibit 4: A composite of three images showing one raised bed these aweful creations have run riot in. Ohhh, the humanity.

Exhibit 5: A frontal shot of the same infected area.
(Caution: Not for the faint of heart.)

Doesn't it just make you want to grab a weed-eater, or a flame-thrower, or perhaps call in an air strike?

 

[YmirGF]

Exhibit 6: A particularly ghastly pink thingy. *wretch*

Exhibit 7: A top down view of the same demonic creation.

Exhibit 8: A particularly disgusting "ground hugger". (And here I thought "tree huggers" were bad.)

Exhibit 9: I caught this evil entity trying to hide under another weed. They are so sneaky, I tell you.

Exhibit 10: Another one lurking under innocent surrounding foliage. Makes me want to get out the clippers and give it a hair cut it won't soon forget.

 

[angellous_evangellous]

Wow. Nice garden. I want one.

I just pee on my weeds. It's a God-given right of man.

 

[YmirGF]

Exhibit 11: *sobbing* (I'm almost done.) Just when I thought it was safe again, I discovered this monstrosity hiding under the 2nd bird feeder. *openly weeps*

Exhibit 12: The scurilous blue ball. (Lord, give me strength!)

If anyone can aid me with the extermination of theses heinous creatures, it might just save my sanity. I am going to go now and gets some quotes from a few asphalt companies... maybe a nice load of environmentally friendly gravel, as well. :areyoucra

 

[whereismynotecard]

That's so pretty.

 

[Valjean]

Hideous!

The invasion seems pretty extensive, Ymir. You might want to consider an aerial sprraying of Paraquat.

 

[Sk8Joyful]

What makes Yellow-daffodils = wanted flowers; while Yellow-dandelions = unwanted weeds?

 

[YmirGF]

What makes Yellow-daffodils = wanted flowers; while Yellow-dandelions = unwanted weeds?

In truth, all plants are weeds to an extent. Alas the hearty dandelion does not last long when within the cross-hairs of my sight. Plus, when was the last time you walked into a nursery and asked for a flat of dandelions? It could be fun, if one was especially bored some time. Do try to keep a straight face, however. Ohh, and it is advisable to keep a lookout for enraged gardeners who may be packing Tazers.

 

[ἀλήθεια]

Well, I want to get my post count up, so I'll inform you that dandelions are a food crop. They're delicious cooked, but only if you know how to preseve them before cooking.