What is Hell Like?

[xkatz]

I found this hilarious answer to a question about Hell:

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :


Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

I am wondering what others people's beliefs in Hell are and if this student is correct?

 

[Riverwolf]

IMO, heaven and hell are experienced in this life; whether or not they're experienced after life, I don't know.

 

[ChristineES]

The way I see it is that hell is the separation between God and humans. Heaven is the union of God and humans. And I believe our spirits are eternal and God is eternal. I don't know if heaven and hell are eternal or not.

 

[dust1n]

Hell is other people.

- Jean-Paul Sartre

 

[fantome profane]

IMO, heaven and hell are experienced in this life

You slept with Teresa too?

 

[Riverwolf]

You slept with Teresa too?

...I don't get it.

 

[Commoner]

I found this hilarious answer to a question about Hell:

I am wondering what others people's beliefs in Hell are and if this student is correct?

Yeah, it's a good one, one of my friends actually showed me this a couple of (hundred) years ago. Although, I think your version is actually juiced up a bit. As I remember it, the student answered that hell must be endothermic, since...ahem...hell has not yet frozen over, and there was no shouting of any kind in my version either.

Or maybe I read the "conservative" version.

Oh...and I'm pretty sure neither this nor the conservative version were actual answers in an exam. Still fun though...

 

[whereismynotecard]

I think hell is really hot, kind of like Texas, but that there's lots of swimming pools, so it's actually pretty fun. Plus, all of my friends will be there.

 

[zenzero]

Friend Riverwolf,

Originally Posted by fantôme profane
You slept with Teresa too?

...I don't get it.

You may not get it
Meaning Teresa is not a person in person but a character of the story which has been narrated by our friend xkatz to prove that Hell is exothermic and his hero sleeps with Teresa. To which our friend fantôme profane remarks that friend xkatz has slept with Teresa [jokingly] which you have missed.
If you do not get Teresa now, just sleep over it, if not with!

Love & rgds

 

[Riverwolf]

Friend Riverwolf,



You may not get it
Meaning Teresa is not a person in person but a character of the story which has been narrated by our friend xkatz to prove that Hell is exothermic and his hero sleeps with Teresa. To which our friend fantôme profane remarks that friend xkatz has slept with Teresa [jokingly] which you have missed.
If you do not get Teresa now, just sleep over it, if not with!

Love & rgds

OH! Now I get it... kinda. (I'd forgotten that the girl slept with was named Teresa; I'm terrible with names.)

 

[Madhuri]

Hell is a state of consciousness, brought about as a consequence of the negative choices we make in life. It is experienced in both this life and the in-between (the time between death of this body and conception of next body).

 

[Apollonius Zagreus]

Ask a drug-user desperate for a fix.

 

[zenzero]

Friend xkatz,

What is Hell Like?

Your story has already stated what it is like however personally would state:
Hell is the just on the other side of heaven. Like positive and negative which crosses the *zero* point where neither is there heaven nor hell.

Love & rgds

 

[123VOXON]

Just be careful... the opening statement was funny... well stated... yet, if there is a creator holding his creation responsible then this matter should be considered seriously.

 

[fantome profane]

Just be careful... the opening statement was funny... well stated... yet, if there is a creator holding his creation responsible then this matter should be considered seriously.

And if the boogieman is hiding under your bed you should take that seriously as well.

 

[Commoner]

And if the boogieman is hiding under your bed you should take that seriously as well.

How am I supposed to go to sleep now?! :thud:

 

[Mr Cheese]

hell...

 

[fantome profane]

How am I supposed to go to sleep now?! :thud:

I said “if”.

 

[staying]

In my mind, Hell is just like a big big black hole, without an end.

 

[logician]

Remember the Bush administration?