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When Can Someone Change His or Her Consent to Sex?
- Thread starter Sunstone
- Start date
Kilgore Trout
Misanthropic Humanist
Anyone who doesn't see this as a rhetorical question isn't emotionally mature enough to be having sex.
Good point.
Well, yes they can withdraw that consent anytime they want but as to whether or not it will be honoured is an entirely different story. Sexual intercourse isn't child's play where you say "you can get in now, nope get out, no, get in, no out"etc. That's just childish and immature and defeats the whole purpose of love-making.
fallingblood
Agnostic Theist
I'm going to agree with this. My reasons are:
Sex can be painful. If it becomes painful for whatever reason, there should be a right to withdraw consent. And really, this would not be too uncommon. If it is a persons first time, there can be problems either with one of the partners not being sensitive enough, or there could be a reaction to the condom, lubrication, etc. That should be respected. (Not to mention the many other instances in which pain can ensue).
Sex can also be emotionally painful. There are often cases in which one of the individuals calls out some other name while in the middle of intercourse, and that could have severe emotional consequences, and thus reasonable to withdraw consent.
There are also cases in which new information can be learned during intercourse. I had a friend who almost got an ex-girlfriend pregnant because she had claimed she was on the pill, but during intercourse, blurted out that she was going to have his baby. That is definitely a reason to withdraw consent. I also knew a guy in school who had herpes and wouldn't say anything until he was having sex with a girl. He thought it was funny, but it definitely is a reason to withdraw consent as well.
Also, the situation can change. One can think that what they are participating in is a romantic connection, but then find out that it is nothing but a game (or in one case that I know, the guy was secretly videotaping it, and she found out). There is a reason to withdraw consent as well as consent was given based on false information and manipulation.
So I would say that there are definitely good reasons for withdrawing consent.
Agreed.
dawny0826
Mother Heathen
Amen.
ron4711
Member
Sex is not like jumping off a building and deciding you want to stop falling half way. Love making is about respecting the other person. So when they say stop you must stop, otherwise it turns into rape.
I disagree. I think it's childish and immature to expect that no matter what, once penetration occurs, it has to finish to orgasm regardless of whatever physical or emotional discomfort, pain, anguish, or fear either partner experiences. I think that is immature and selfish to disregard someone else's boundaries, however they may change at any moment.
What is the whole purpose of love-making then, in your opinion?
Titanic
Well-Known Member
what about the people that can not have sex? what about them the people who suffer from involuntary celibacy and can not experience a romantic relationship? I know someone who as commited sucide because they could not have sex. I think that is what we should be thinking about, not can i withdraw consent.[which i do agree though]. p.s i was just trying to make a point and be a voice for the people that are involuntary celibate.
I think that might be more appropriate for another thread with a different topic.
Titanic
Well-Known Member
yeah you are right, i just had too get that off of my chest.
Me Myself
Back to my username
Sure, why not?
At any point in the encounter, anyone may decide s/he doesnt want to keep having sex.
Which is _____???? If you love someone, and they ask you to stop, what should you do?
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Reptillian
Hamburgler Extraordinaire
Exactly, if someone says "I don't like that" or "I'm not comfortable with this" then any further forced activity is rape.
Skwim
Veteran Member
I wouldn't count on it in a court of law.
fallingblood
Agnostic Theist
I would second this. While ethically, a person may consider such rape (and I would agree), legally, it would be a hard sell. Even rape within a marriage often is not treated like rape in a legal matter.
Me Myself
Back to my username
Verbal communication is too little of a message for that claim to be reasonable as it is.
There are many ways and tones with which "I dont like that" can be said.