PureX
Veteran Member
What was it that you needed God to do for you that you could not have done for yourself?I am going to lay my cards right on the table. I am really angry at God because He created humans and animals with mortal bodies such that they will die. Why did God have to create humans and animals this way? If I think about it for very long I hate God for what He did, but what other choices did He have? I don’t know because I am not God, but is God is All-Knowing and All-Powerful so I tend to think it did not have to be this way. The more I type the angrier I become.
Obviously, God created it this way for a reason, so according to believers I am just supposed to accept that there was a reason and not complain, but I am going to complain because death has caused undue suffering for so many people, because there is nothing worse than losing a loved one, nothing.
I know that some Christians believe it was not supposed to be this way at least for humans, until Adam and Eve sinned, but I do not believe that bodies ever could have lived forever because they were not created to me immortal, so living forever in a physical body is absurd to me. But what is the other option? Death.
Now, let’s try to pretend that people are not afraid of dying.
If that is true, why all the fear of Covid-19, why the masks and social distancing, closing schools and businesses and basically shutting down economies all over the world? Let’s get real folks; people are terrified of death, even though most people believe in an afterlife. Most people enjoy life and they do not want to die, no matter how great heaven might be.
When Covid-19 first hit, I was not afraid at all, and I wondered why people were so fearful. I was never afraid because I am not afraid of my own death, since I have a pretty good idea where I am headed and I know it is not the end of me, but rather just a new beginning in another world, a world that is much better than this hellhole.
I am going to lay some more cards on the table. I have lost all my loved ones to death, first my father, then my sister and then my mother. I think my brother is still alive but I never talk to him anymore. I never had any children so all I have left is my husband, and he is 10 years older than me so he will probably die before I die. But that does not bother me as much as when my cats die because I know where my husband is going and I know I will see him again. I do not know where my cats are going, if anywhere, and I do not know if I will ever see my cats again because that was never revealed in any scriptures. Some people think it is in scriptures that animals have no spirit that lives on so they expire at death but that is just their interpretation.
I have lost so many cats in the last 23 years I have lost track of the number, but it is probably more than 30. If you want to you can blame me for having so many cats, but I already know I risk loss by having so many cats, I am not an idiot. So go ahead and blame me, I cannot feel much worse than I already feel.I know I run the risk of criticism by posting this, but it finally came down to this because I cannot go on like this anymore, feeling completely alone.
My husband is the only one who knows our situation and how I suffer and how it has nearly destroyed me so many times. But he does not really understand how I feel because he is very different when it comes to death and loss. He never even got sad or cried when either of his parents died, it was just like any other day; his only sister died about a week ago and he never got sad or cried. It is the same way when a cat dies. He is like a stone. I finally had to get a counselor again after five years of not having one, because it got so bad last January.
I am not going to go into any details about what happened to the cats or what has happened more recently because it is just too horrible, unimaginable. I will sometimes talk about it in private but only with people who want to know, people I trust. Unfortunately, nice as she is, by new counselor is not much help to me, but it is better than having nobody to talk to, even though I can only talk on the phone now because of Covid-19 restrictions and I cannot get regular appointments.
But where the hell is God when you need Him? Nowhere. The only help I have ever gotten is from kind and compassionate people, some of whom are on this forum. God is nowhere to be found. Sorry, I am not buying off on that God is working through these people because the people deserve the credit, not God. Interestingly, most of these kind and compassionate people have been atheists.
Now is the time for all the believers to blame me for not having God at my side because I am “shutting God out,” as if they could ever know that is what I am doing. Besides, if God is really All-Powerful and All-Loving, God could get in even if I am shutting Him out.
I rest my case.
Let me put this another way. I found you question intriguing: why didnlt God just make us immortal in the first place, if we were going to end up being immortal, anyway? And of course I have no way of knowing what God might be thinking, but I surmise that we are given the experience of mortality to help us learn something that we need to know when we become immortal. So what might that be?
I don't know. Maybe God wants us to learn to truly appreciate the gift of immortality, and we couldn't do that without having it taken away from us for a time. And especially without our experiencing someone ELSE being taken away from us for a time. Someone we care about even more than ourselves. To lose THEM is truly to know what mortality is, and means. And thereby, later on, what a gift immortality really is. Especially with and for our loved ones.
The pain is for learning appreciation, perhaps.
