Mark Dohle
Well-Known Member
Writing Prisoners
About seven years ago I started to write a prisoner. Over the years the number has grown a bit. however, I have never written to more than four at a time. When one is released, I pick up someone else. I find a letter in my mailbox, addressed to the Monastery. More than that would be too much for me to keep up with. I have learned a lot from the men I write to. for the most part, they are seeking God. they want a different kind of life, one that has a purpose. When they are released they go their own way, which is as it should be. I do hear from one man, who was released from prison about three years ago, a couple of times a year. He is struggling, but staying on the path that he had started. He was deported back to his home country. He misses the USA but knows that he will never be able to return. There is always plenty to pray for. They are human, and many of them really want to change.
Below is a letter I sent to one of the prisoners I am writing. I am doing this to raise awareness about those incarcerated. Many need to be locked up, others are in for a number of years and will be released. A large percentage of them never return to prison but go on to lead lives that are meaningful.
We had a speaker many years ago who broke it down this way. 20% are hardcore, will never fit in with society. 60% are in because they were simply caught, or did something 'stupid,. these never return. He then said this, which surprised me. 20% want to be in prison! Not too sure about that, but he was an expert of some sort. So below is a letter that I wrote to a new prisoner that I have written only two letters. Pray for him and for all those in prison that they may find healing and be able to never return to lockup.
In writing prisoners, one can't be naive. I do get a few con-men who have written me, but once I tell them what I can do, and what I won't do, they do not write me back. Being a monk will also attract prisoners who have a religious/spiritual bent. They have organizations that vet prisoners for people who want to write them. Men who will not try to con, or take advantage.
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17 December 2021
Hello Nickolas,
I had to smile when you talked about your name and Christmas. I never made that connection, perhaps which points out that my childlike spirit is asleep! Yes, names can be a problem for the very young. Some parents may do it on purpose, because of a certain thing they like or love very much. I remember a sad case about a young woman, who was overweight, whose name (no kidding), was ‘Ima Fat’. It may cause a laugh but in adults, they quickly see that it could be a name that causes a great deal of pain. Empathy, I believe, has to be learned, life is a good school for that. Some never learn, I sort of pity them, they are missing a part of their humanity.
I have no doubt that being in prison does have its challenges, as far as living a deep interior life. However, don’t forget, grace is always there. Grace is God’s love and care. I have found from writing quite a few prisoners, if they have the smallest desire to seek God, the grace pours in. The struggles you have can lead you deeper in the understanding of your need for the Lord’s help. “Blessed are the poor in Spirit”. Being poor in the Lord’s eyes is a state that allows him to work his healing in ways that you are not aware of. Just stay open.
‘The lack of a chaplain and other supports that many take for granted who are not in prison is not a barrier to God working in your life. The scriptures, prayer, and the simple desire to grow in the love of God are all you need. Every day, just get through it, trying at the end to have grown in love and trust in God's saving grace. Not only for you but for all there with you. Pray for all of them, especially those who give you the most trouble. Don’t forget, you belong to the ‘priesthood of the faithful. When you pray, the Holy Spirit prays in you, leading you.
Being disheartened is an understandable reaction to a situation that is as you said “toxic”. However in such an environment, with its challenges, is also a crucible that allows you to grow in self-knowledge, which is necessary to grow in humility. As you know humility is the ability to embrace truth, without getting bent-out-of-shape, not being surprised when you fail. Humility allows you to make the choice to trust, which is always a choice. Albeit, a difficult one.
Here is a good mediation that ‘might’ help you with your relationship with those who give you the most problems. Pick out a prisoner, one whom perhaps you do not know, but do not like. Then when alone, think about him in the Lord's presence. Understand that he is like all of us. He has a past, perhaps a very rough one, his actions can come from a place of fear, or just deep anger, or anxiety, that he may not even be aware of. For our left hand, often does not know what our right hand is doing. Just ask the Lord to receive the gift to see him as someone worthy of love and respect, even if you can’t show it publicly. In doing that your vision of others will change. The struggle will still be there, but your ability to still keep some objectivity about the humanity of those with whom you struggle will grow. The Lord will heal many inner wounds if you do that, as well, your prayers for the one you choose to pray for will be answered in God’s way and time. Then do it for someone else. Perhaps the Warden, and those who work there. Ask the Lord to make your heart more truly human, loving, and compassionate.
There is no place where the presence and the love of God are not fully operative. Since you have faith, allow your inner vision to grow in the knowledge of this loving infinite presence. As St. Paul says: “In him, we live, and move, and have our being”. Again it is a choice to see that and believe, even if things seem dark. All things pass, emotions change, moods come and go, yet God is our true north. Study the Sermon on the Mount often, or read the ‘Last Discourse’ in the Gospel of John. 1st John is also a very beautiful epistle to read over and over again in a prayerful way. -Br.MD
Below is a web page if anyone feels that they could make a difference in a prisoners life-Br.MD
5 Ways Writing Letters to Prisoners Makes a Difference - Crossroads Prison Ministries