Young people and masturbation

[Sha'irullah]

I could not imagine putting myself in this situation primarily because I could not imagine having children in the future........at all.

But if that moment occurred all I would say to them is to at least find something else better to do.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

so they can in fact get a divorce.

I wonder what the infidelity rate is amoungst JW's...?

Obviously but only under one circumstance, so they can't just get a divorce because they are unhappy with each other, one of them would have to have sex with someone else which puts them under risk of being disfellowshipped, I doubt a lot of women would take this risk as she would get a name for herself as a "Jezebel" JWs gossip a lot. There is a lot of pressure for them not to divorce.

 

[Me Myself]

I think it's awesome that he talked to his daughters about it. I have two daughters and can only imagine...

As a kid my parents never talked about this kind of stuff. I'm more open with my children and would answer their questions and probably approach the issue comparably.

For a kid, it has to feel pretty awesome to know that your parents DON'T think you're a freak.

Sure, its important someone does it, I am just commenting generally I think the same gendered parent would make the issue feel less awkward.

He said they are used to him being direct, dontknow if it meant they also felt less awkward with him telling them than their mother.

Nt terribly important anyways, as long as at least one of them tells em.

 

[Sunstone]

Anything as dangerous as masturbation should not be attempted by young people, but rather left to trained, life-long professional dare-devils, such as myself.

 

[Sha'irullah]

Anything as dangerous as masturbation should not be attempted by young people, but rather left to trained, life-long professional dare-devils, such as myself.

OK "sticky fingers", everyone is entitled to their own opinions, no need to force them upon each other

 

[CMike]

Yes, that darn insulin spike from all that sugar in the ice cream. Insulin is a really bad hormone to mess with. Not to mention the flood of serotonin in the brain.

Must... not... eat... ice... cream... must... re... sist.

Actually I do. I have diabetes.

 

[Penumbra]

I would expect the kid to explore herself or himself, have fun, and begin forming a healthy positive view of her sexuality.

Telling the kid it is not okay or to not talk to me about it would just add on to even more sexual repression in this culture. A kid normally would not even talk to a parent anyway and would just do it, because sexuality is a topic with a lot of taboos around it.

And if parents think their kid will not do it just because they consider it bad, that is just incorrect the vast majority of the time. Might as well let their first outlet of sexuality happen with a view of acceptance and rationality rather than repression and guilt.

 

[SkepticThinker]

well there are better ways to fulfill sexual desire...the bible encourages young people in such a situation to marry. Sexuality and its desire is filled through marriage with a loving partner.

So 11 year olds should be getting married?

 

[Gjallarhorn]

So 11 year olds should be getting married?

Certainly would explain the "sanctity" of Biblical marriage ages.

 

[Leftimies]

"Moderation in everything - do not let it grow onto you too much"

 

[Caladan]

Your 11-13 year-old child asks you if it's alright if they masturbate. What would your answer be?

Why?

I'll buy them their first playboy stash. And if its a girl I guess its going to be the playgirl... I'm not really versed in the department of the other play field.

 

[Me Myself]

I'll buy them their first playboy stash. And if its a girl I guess its going to be the playgirl... I'm not really versed in the department of the other play field.

You do understand they will be using internet instead of mags, right?

 

[Caladan]

You do understand they will be using internet instead of mags, right?

I'm old fashioned.

 

[lewisnotmiller]

I'm old fashioned.

Man...all you needed to say was that 'the collection' was a digital media subscription, not a pile of sticky-paged magazines, and you would have looked ahead of the game.

 

[Caladan]

Man...all you needed to say was that 'the collection' was a digital media subscription, not a pile of sticky-paged magazines, and you would have looked ahead of the game.

Well, my children would be able to explore their sexuality when hitting puberty, but I'm pretty sure I am going to be square about allowing them too much technological excess. Smartphones, tablets, bad internet habits... I'm not gonna encourage that with my children.

 

[lewisnotmiller]

Well, my children would be able to explore their sexuality when hitting puberty, but I'm pretty sure I am going to be square about allowing them too much technological excess. Smartphones, tablets, bad internet habits... I'm not gonna encourage that with my children.

Really? Hmmm...
It's a hard line to tread (and a side issue in terms of this thread) but I'm definitely exposing my kids to smartphones and tablets already. The primary school they're going to uses them after Grade 3 (or 4...not sure) and the kids are taught to see them as a mobile library, in some ways.

That seems a little simplistic for my liking, so I want to teach them a bit more than that beforehand. Critical reading skills, and the lack of them in younger folks (generically) is a major bugbear for me. So I'll teach them how to use a tablet, then how to evaluate sources.

But there are obvious downsides to this approach, and 'bad internet habits' is as good a motherhood statement for those as anything else.

 

[Caladan]

Really? Hmmm...
It's a hard line to tread (and a side issue in terms of this thread) but I'm definitely exposing my kids to smartphones and tablets already. The primary school they're going to uses them after Grade 3 (or 4...not sure) and the kids are taught to see them as a mobile library, in some ways.

That seems a little simplistic for my liking, so I want to teach them a bit more than that beforehand. Critical reading skills, and the lack of them in younger folks (generically) is a major bugbear for me. So I'll teach them how to use a tablet, then how to evaluate sources.

But there are obvious downsides to this approach, and 'bad internet habits' is as good a motherhood statement for those as anything else.

I'm not going to deny them the technology, just excessive use of it, and do my best to deal with bad internet/social media habits. As from my experience on these platforms, most adults can't even deal with it.

 

[McBell]

I'm not going to deny them the technology, just excessive use of it, and do my best to deal with bad internet/social media habits. As from my experience on these platforms, most adults can't even deal with it.

Stay out of this district.
My daughter who just graduated spent the last four years doing the vast majority of her school work on the laptop the school provided her.

Even her text books were on the computer.

 

[lewisnotmiller]

I'm not going to deny them the technology, just excessive use of it, and do my best to deal with bad internet/social media habits. As from my experience on these platforms, most adults can't even deal with it.

Ahhh...that makes sense. 'Excessive' is a hard thing to define though, but I get where you're coming from, and agree. Balance in all things.

You're right about adults not being able to deal with it. I kinda think that more exposure in a controlled fashion as a kid is a better solution than less exposure, though, as well as teaching complimentary skills that are not necessarily tech-based, but are applicable to the tech-realm.

I have a little hobby-horse regarding critical reading, and I think it's more important than ever that kids are taught those skills. And they can be taught from pre-school age (after a fashion, anyways...) The more diverse and less controlled information sources become, the more important it will be.

I think the other thing is that use can demystify. I don't see computers as anything special, and haven't for a long time. I went nutso over my smartphone when I first got one, and now it's merely a tool (mostly, anyway). If I got a tablet, I'd probably love it, then find it just another tool. So I'm trying to get my kids to see things along the same lines.

Easier said than done, but I think technology, and access to technology will be ubiquitous, if it's not already.

 

[Caladan]

Stay out of this district.
My daughter who just graduated spent the last four years doing the vast majority of her school work on the laptop the school provided her.

Even her text books were on the computer.

Not sure you read the entire above exchange. I don't plan to deny them technology, just cultivate a good use of it. For example, seeing a couple in dinner for a two hours, while all she does is play on her tablet, and his face is fixated on his smartphone, is pathetic. Its an addiction, a psychotic one as far as I'm concerned.
Regarding academic use of a laptop, I'm fully aware of that, because I use a laptop for 6 years now for academic and professional needs. Not only did I use it on campus, but I used one on a long several months excavation on the field, and I am typing on one from Iceland right now... because even from here I occasionally correspond with colleagues and academics.
Using a laptop for academic use is of course a must today, at least as far as I am concerned.

Ahhh...that makes sense. 'Excessive' is a hard thing to define though, but I get where you're coming from, and agree. Balance in all things.

You're right about adults not being able to deal with it. I kinda think that more exposure in a controlled fashion as a kid is a better solution than less exposure, though, as well as teaching complimentary skills that are not necessarily tech-based, but are applicable to the tech-realm.

I have a little hobby-horse regarding critical reading, and I think it's more important than ever that kids are taught those skills. And they can be taught from pre-school age (after a fashion, anyways...) The more diverse and less controlled information sources become, the more important it will be.

I think the other thing is that use can demystify. I don't see computers as anything special, and haven't for a long time. I went nutso over my smartphone when I first got one, and now it's merely a tool (mostly, anyway). If I got a tablet, I'd probably love it, then find it just another tool. So I'm trying to get my kids to see things along the same lines.

Easier said than done, but I think technology, and access to technology will be ubiquitous, if it's not already.

We can't really make our children oblivious to technological advances, because they are exposed to it and they are likely to pick it up faster than we ever did. However we can cultivate good use of it.
For example much of what I see on various on line platforms is simply extra garbage on line. Something which often leaves me dumbfounded, as I value the internet (as a generic tool) as a powerful instrument with abundance of potential. However, most people don't know how to harness this tool, and mostly use it for casual crap.