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9 Nights: A Journal

Spiderman

Veteran Member
Today was the big fight.

Fasting got rough, and I finally felt hungry. I also felt the urge to 'stress eat' as things kind of fell apart around me. People around me acted in abrasive, thoughtless and inappropriate ways(though I'll admit Ares was very well behaved today!), and I struggled with their behavior on physical, emotional, and mental levels. I felt like I was battling my own Mahishasura.

So much of life is a fight. I feel like I'm in frequent battle; with circumstances, with those who would bring ill, and against my own baser urges. Some things aren't worth fighting for(which is why I tend to be sparse in the debate section), but others are worth it(like fighting to assure my kids have a relevant education). Sometimes its hard to know what to fight for, and what to let be. And sometimes, its just plain tiring.

Morale is very important for a soldier. Keep your morale high. I just finished my prayers to Durga. I included you in them! :)
 

Spiderman

Veteran Member
Hell, maybe its time to invest in some chainmail...

There's no logical reason to wear chainmail, but it might be fun anyways.
Spiritual armor.

Like the Christian "Armor of GOd".

Untitleddesign_15_b9834631-7faa-48b6-8e4c-b02d6e63b0b9_1024x1024.png
 

JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
I ate stuff today!

Just raw foods, but still... food.

During the the second set of three days in Navaratri, many people move from focusing worship on Durga to Lakshmi. We are doing this tonight as well.

All I can really say is that after going for three days with zilch, I am appreciating my food in a new way. Its nice to eat to be nourished, rather than impulse or sensory feeding. And it reminds me some of how 'wealth' can be viewed in day to day life as well. There is so much that so many of us have become 'wealthy' with, but we become used to it and take it for granted.

Thank you, Lakshmi, for all you provide!
 

JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
Here is Lakshmi's altar.

It was a bit hard for my son to get a good picture of it because the light was behind him.

20211010_185855.jpg


I know candles are not traditional on a Hindu altar, but when we set up our original altar for her at the old house, we didn't really know that. We didn't know much of anything yet; my husband set it up because he felt called to do so. They are hers now; we never felt she objected.
 

JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
Its said that the meaning of life can be divided into 4 different categories: dharma(or duty), kama(desire fulfillment), moksha(liberation), and artha(wealth). I admit I have trouble with the last one.

It isn't that I dislike wealth. I certainly do not. One needs an amount of wealth in life simply to secure it. Few are self sufficient enough to pick dinner out of the woods, and even if one is, its a miserable existence for most forced to live it. I am thankful for what I have. However, I struggle with the materialism of the world around me. I am living in a material world, but I am not a material girl. And that can be difficult when trying to relate to others.

I admit, I'll never understand a life built primarily around wealth. If wealth happens, that's great, but I don't get wealth for wealth's sake. Sometimes I am impatient or bothered by the materialistic outlook of others. But, this is the world I live in. I pray that Lakshmi grants me patience to handle this, and that she may guide others to use her gifts in thoughtful and meaningful ways.
 

JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
My husband and I went to the temple this evening. We don't get to go often, as its a two hour drive one way(making it a 4 hour round trip). We also generally try to find someone to watch the kids, as Ares can be disruptive.

The puja was interesting; it was both a Rudrabishikam combined with the Durga puja. It was nice to go to a Rudrabishikam again; we used to make a point to go monthly before Covid.

After 6 days of fasting, things have kind of gotten chaotic. Fasting is making my husband really crabby, and unfortunately, its making me sensitive. Its been a bad combination. However, its made me face just how often I'd been reaching to food for comfort. Now that I can't do that, I've been having to confront all the bad feelings I usually just stifle with a snack.
 

Spiderman

Veteran Member
Here is Lakshmi's altar.

It was a bit hard for my son to get a good picture of it because the light was behind him.

View attachment 56345

I know candles are not traditional on a Hindu altar, but when we set up our original altar for her at the old house, we didn't really know that. We didn't know much of anything yet; my husband set it up because he felt called to do so. They are hers now; we never felt she objected.


That's absolutely beautiful George! I'll try not to envy you. :p

Keep fighting the good fight! :)
 

JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
I'm on the last three days of my fast, but much of the restrictions have been lifted now. I'm now partaking in traditional fasting foods which ordinarily feel a bit restrictive, but compared with what I've been eating seems like a feast.

Tonight we worship Saraswati, goddess of the arts, learning, and culture. Preparing food for myself again brings me to one of my most favorite parts of culture: cooking. Years ago, I was pushed into cooking because there was no other way. Of course, I was preparing food before(we had to eat), but much of it was half-premade or the '20 minutes or less' recipes much of society seems to thrive off. And then our food budget got slashed. The easy meals, while they were cheap already, weren't cheap enough. I had to dig deeper to make ends meet. And in the process, I found I loved cooking.

But being vegetarian in the Midwest kinda stinks. I got bored with trying to eat like everyone else; it wasn't affordable to eat like that, anyways. I started 'exploring the world' through my pots and pans. I began to research what people in other places in the world eat. Its something I still enjoy very much to this day.

While Lakshmi provides the bounty to our tables, Saraswati provides the expertise to make the experience a delight.
 

Spiderman

Veteran Member
I'm on the last three days of my fast, but much of the restrictions have been lifted now. I'm now partaking in traditional fasting foods which ordinarily feel a bit restrictive, but compared with what I've been eating seems like a feast.

Tonight we worship Saraswati, goddess of the arts, learning, and culture. Preparing food for myself again brings me to one of my most favorite parts of culture: cooking. Years ago, I was pushed into cooking because there was no other way. Of course, I was preparing food before(we had to eat), but much of it was half-premade or the '20 minutes or less' recipes much of society seems to thrive off. And then our food budget got slashed. The easy meals, while they were cheap already, weren't cheap enough. I had to dig deeper to make ends meet. And in the process, I found I loved cooking.

But being vegetarian in the Midwest kinda stinks. I got bored with trying to eat like everyone else; it wasn't affordable to eat like that, anyways. I started 'exploring the world' through my pots and pans. I began to research what people in other places in the world eat. Its something I still enjoy very much to this day.

While Lakshmi provides the bounty to our tables, Saraswati provides the expertise to make the experience a delight.
Interesting you call yourself "King Poop".

A few days ago, we watched a video about a guy named George who uses human waste to convert it into fertilizer in a third world country. :p

Anyway,
Goddess of arts, learning , and culture? I'll pray to her to sharpen my skills at writing.

I can't cook for ****. I can't really learn well unless I'm really super interested in something. Arts? I can barely draw stick figures.

That's great you can cook. I just microwave food and eat lots of fruits, vegetables , and stuff that doesn't need to be cooked.

I hope all is well.

I have prayed less to Durga today and more to someone else who got my attention with a few signs it seems. Thanks for reminding me pay homage to Durga. I have ten minutes till midnight. I'm on it! ;)
 

JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
Interesting you call yourself "King Poop".

A few days ago, we watched a video about a guy named George who uses human waste to convert it into fertilizer in a third world country. :p

Anyway,
Goddess of arts, learning , and culture? I'll pray to her to sharpen my skills at writing.

I can't cook for ****. I can't really learn well unless I'm really super interested in something. Arts? I can barely draw stick figures.

That's great you can cook. I just microwave food and eat lots of fruits, vegetables , and stuff that doesn't need to be cooked.

I hope all is well.

I have prayed less to Durga today and more to someone else who got my attention with a few signs it seems. Thanks for reminding me pay homage to Durga. I have ten minutes till midnight. I'm on it! ;)

The title came from this thread: Conscious thoughts is hear by declaring a RF coup...... Basically, I stole Religious Forums from @Conscious thoughts and declared myself King Poop.

I've heard of lots of constructive things one can do with poop... I think it was @exchemist who told me about sewage farming!

Raw food is good for you, anyways. :) I think I use cooking to 'visit' all the places I'll never get to go. You can also learn a lot about the history of a place by the foods eaten there, so its a history lesson of sorts.

I hope your prayers go well, no matter who they're to!
 

JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
20211014_001710.jpg

Here is Saraswati's altar(the big circle shadow is a globe).

Recently, Ares has decided he likes music. Very select songs, but its a big change. Music used to be a huge part of my life. I spent years in school playing cello, and later took up piano and guitar. However, my real love lied in vocals; I loved to sing.

A friend and I(my twin, I called her) used to practice together. Hours a day. If we couldn't be together, we'd do it on the phone. Rewind the tape/CD to the point we struggled, redo it until it was perfect. It was fun doing song that had harmonizing parts; we never discussed who'd take what part, but just naturally fell into it. We(along with some other friends) tried to form a band, but that never went anywhere. But we'd sing when we could; together or apart. I loved karaoke; I actually got requests sometimes.

My oldest son's father took the words out of me. It wasn't long into the relationship before he let me know he didn't like my voice. Women shouldn't sing like that(I'm a hard rock kind of girl). Crapped all over me any time I'd try... so I stopped. We were together about 6 years. When I left, I tried again... and well, my voice changed. Severely out of practice, I shut up once again.

When Ares blasted a song I liked the other day, I surprisingly allowed myself to sing along. "Mom-mom!" Ares's eyes got wide. He didn't know his mother could make such noise. It felt strange to feel my vocal cords move like that again. I wish I could say it sounded great, but I'm now so out of practice, I don't remember what I'm doing anymore.

Saraswati, grant me the courage to keep trying, and to make music part of my life again.
 
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JustGeorge

Imperfect
Staff member
Premium Member
On concluding the final night of Navaratri, I'd like to express some gratitude to Saraswati.

I love books. Since I was old enough to enjoy a story being read, I think I've been fascinated with them. When I was a kid, my mom would get mad at me for reading my books too fast; she couldn't keep me supplied with enough reading materials. She could take me to the library, but I think that got old for her, too.

As a young adult, books were a bit out of my reach. They were expensive, and money was something I didn't have much of. The library didn't always keep the kids of things I wanted to read, either. I treasured the books I did have, and re-read them frequently.

With internet used book sales becoming more popular as I got older, books became obtainable again. My husband and I have amassed quite a library at this point(mostly all religious/spiritual/cultural topics). I feel blessed to live in a home in which I can turn any which way and find something beautiful and inspirational to read.

Thank you Saraswati, for bringing worlds of information and inspiration within my reach!
 
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