Anger Management

[an anarchist]

Started attending anger management group again this past week.

Was wondering if anyone has gone through anger management courses or knows anything about anger management in general.

What did you learn/take away from it?

The thing they taught me is that the very first thing in anger management is to be able to walk away.

I asked them well what's the second thing to do, cause I get mad when I'm cooking at work and walking away would mean quitting. And they were like "Yes. You are not meant to be a cook." That may sound harsh, but it was their response after we discussed what got me mad while I was at work. Nothing in particular gets me mad, just when the pressure is on and the stress builds I'll get uncontrollably angry if even one little thing goes wrong (which will inevitably happen).

Made me cry when they told me that. I felt like how little Ralphie must've felt when Santa told him "you'll shoot your eye out, kid!" (Christmas story).

Anyways, seriously considering trying for that disability as I have social phobia so customer service is out of the question for me. Cooking and customer service, that's all there is for entry level jobs besides dishwashing. So it's either I'm a dishwasher indefinitely or social security.

Anyways, I'm curious about other methods of anger management, besides walking away lol. I'm stuck working for a bit regardless, disability process takes a while.

My psychiatrist is willing to give me double the max psychiatric dosage of the bipolar medicine I'm on. Physically it's not dangerous they give seizure patients much more than that, but still I got issues haha and he sees it. I'm working the dose up slowly as we have to. I"m hoping the antimanics help. Well not hoping they do help significantly I just hope they help enough to where i can keep working. Never made it as high as he said he's willing to prescribe me, so I'll see.

 

[crossfire]

Here's a short article I wrote about transforming anger into clear insight--I hope you find it helpful. I'll hide it behind spoiler tags:

Spoiler

Project Hephæstus' Forge: Transforming Anger
Anger doesn't seem to get any respect. Many people try to avoid or repress the negative emotions like anger, envy, and jealousy, because they can take over your mind and influence you into negative behavior. However, some people get some sort of satisfaction from these emotions, in spite of the negative influence they have on our minds. Repressing these emotions can lead to extreme behavior when they finally do surface, so repression is not a satisfactory option. Satisfying these emotions as they arise makes you a slave to them with only short term satisfaction and often with long term problems that will have to be cleared up. So is there another way of dealing with the wrathful emotions? Indeed, there is.
One aspect of the Left Hand Path is to examine the more negative aspects of your personality in order to understand them and transform them into something more satisfactory, so let's take a quick look at them to get some understanding, and then apply a bit of reasoning that may lead to a way to transform them.
The wrathful emotions are based upon dislike, and are useful in removing or getting around unsatisfactory obstacles. You can approach obstacles from an intelligent manner and skillfully resolve them, or you can try to use force to smash through them. Anger will give you an adrenaline rush that could be channeled into force, but is there another way to channel this extra energy? Let's examine anger a bit more closely:
When you are angry, the accompanying adrenaline rush not only energizes your body, but it also energizes your mind. Before you became angry, your mind was relatively clear and calm, like a lake or a slow moving stream. However, a myriad of energized emotions screaming for attention can quickly turn the calm waters into a cloudy, boiling rage that is anything but clear. {Blind rage} With an energized body and a clouded mind, it would seem that the option of dealing with obstacles by force would be the only way, as it is difficult to go the intelligent route by examining the obstacle when your mind in such a state. Your clouded state of mind is an obstacle to the intelligent route. {Wait a minute--aren't wrathful emotions useful in removing or getting around obstacles? Indeed they are!}
Your first obstacle to deal with is your clouded, boiling raging mind. Direct the energy from the adrenaline rush there first, and remove the clouded state of blind rage from your mind first. Then you will be able to think clearly enough to take the intelligent route for the external problem. {You apply Greater Black Magick to yourself, first, and then you turn to the objective universe }
Anger is a quick and strong emotion. It can quickly silence the other disturbing emotions within your mind to still the boiling activity impeding your ability to think clearly. Once the mind has been cleared, the rush of energy can then be channeled into mental activity in order to find an intelligent solution to the external problem, instead of resorting to force. You have overcome not just one obstacle, (the external problem,) but two obstacles (counting the obstacle of the clouded mind.) When you realize and appreciate benefits of this, the disturbing emotions will welcome and respect anger, and energy will not need to be expended in silencing these disturbing emotions, as they will be pacified by anger. However, when this point has been reached, anger doesn't seem to resemble what it used to be. It has transformed so much that even the name "anger" doesn't seem to fit anymore. So, what has this emotion formerly-known-as-anger become? What name would be suitable for this force that can quickly clear the mind, yet super energize it as well? {Wow! It sounds almost magickal, huh?} I have some names for what a thought-pacifying-mind energizing force can be used as a basis for, including:
⦁ Mushin (Zen)
⦁ Samatha (Eastern religions)
⦁ the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th Rupa Jhanas (Buddhism)
⦁ Shyine (Tibetan)
⦁ Samadhi (Eastern religions)
⦁ Pure Awareness (Advaita)
⦁ Clearing the Grounds to Alaya (Yogacara)
⦁ The Magickal Trance described in Peter J Carroll's Liber Null (Liber MMM)
⦁ Kensho (Zen)
The only real name that I have come across to describe this transformed anger is Great Mirror Wisdom. (If you know of any other names for it, please let me know.) Whatever you may call it, it can be the platform/basis for all of the spiritual practices listed above and more, as well as the more down-to-earth tool for dealing with mundane obstacles in everyday life. So, even if you are not spiritually or magically inclined, it is still worthwhile to apply Hephæstus' Forge to your anger and transform it for the clarity of mind and problem-solving ability it gives in everyday matters, as well as liberation from being enslaved to its more base expression.
Free your mind!

 

[Unfettered]

Started attending anger management group again this past week.

Was wondering if anyone has gone through anger management courses or knows anything about anger management in general.

What did you learn/take away from it?

The thing they taught me is that the very first thing in anger management is to be able to walk away.

I asked them well what's the second thing to do, cause I get mad when I'm cooking at work and walking away would mean quitting. And they were like "Yes. You are not meant to be a cook." That may sound harsh, but it was their response after we discussed what got me mad while I was at work. Nothing in particular gets me mad, just when the pressure is on and the stress builds I'll get uncontrollably angry if even one little thing goes wrong (which will inevitably happen).

Made me cry when they told me that. I felt like how little Ralphie must've felt when Santa told him "you'll shoot your eye out, kid!" (Christmas story).

Anyways, seriously considering trying for that disability as I have social phobia so customer service is out of the question for me. Cooking and customer service, that's all there is for entry level jobs besides dishwashing. So it's either I'm a dishwasher indefinitely or social security.

Anyways, I'm curious about other methods of anger management, besides walking away lol. I'm stuck working for a bit regardless, disability process takes a while.

My psychiatrist is willing to give me double the max psychiatric dosage of the bipolar medicine I'm on. Physically it's not dangerous they give seizure patients much more than that, but still I got issues haha and he sees it. I'm working the dose up slowly as we have to. I"m hoping the antimanics help. Well not hoping they do help significantly I just hope they help enough to where i can keep working. Never made it as high as he said he's willing to prescribe me, so I'll see.

Anger (or aggressive behavior) is a way to attempt to regain control of a situation that we understand (either consciously or subconsciously) has gotten out of our control and will likely result in some form of harm to us.

If you get angry at work when you start to feel pressure, or when something goes wrong when the pressure is up, first identify clearly what the threat to you is perceived as. Is the threat that of being fired? Is the threat that of being reproved by your supervisor? Is the threat that of the dismantling of your self-image as being perfect?

Once you have identified the threat, address the question of whether or not the threat is real. If the threat isn't real, then the next time the situation arises, try to remind yourself that you're not in danger. Perhaps that will help you to keep your cool.

If the threat is real, address the question of whether or not the control you need to remove the threat is control you actually have to apply to the situation. If you have no control you can apply to remove the threat, then the next time the situation arises, try to remind yourself that you have no control over the circumstances that are resulting in the threat. Perhaps that will help you to keep your cool.

When not under the effects of anger or aggression, you'll be able to see clearly to answer such questions as, "Am I really cut out for this kind of work?" or "Is the environment of this particular workplace a problem?" or "Is my employer expecting things from me that exceed what I can control?" Etc.

What do you think?

 

[Secret Chief]

I'd suggest regular zazen (a simple meditation) unless that counts as proselytising.
Not an overnight solution though.

 

[SalixIncendium]

I'd suggest regular zazen (a simple meditation) unless that counts as proselytising.

I was almost converted by this post.

 

[Secret Chief]

I was almost converted by this post.

I'll send you a pamphlet.

 

[Ponder This]

Started attending anger management group again this past week.

Was wondering if anyone has gone through anger management courses or knows anything about anger management in general.

What did you learn/take away from it?

The thing they taught me is that the very first thing in anger management is to be able to walk away.

I asked them well what's the second thing to do, cause I get mad when I'm cooking at work and walking away would mean quitting. And they were like "Yes. You are not meant to be a cook." That may sound harsh, but it was their response after we discussed what got me mad while I was at work. Nothing in particular gets me mad, just when the pressure is on and the stress builds I'll get uncontrollably angry if even one little thing goes wrong (which will inevitably happen).

Made me cry when they told me that. I felt like how little Ralphie must've felt when Santa told him "you'll shoot your eye out, kid!" (Christmas story).

Anyways, seriously considering trying for that disability as I have social phobia so customer service is out of the question for me. Cooking and customer service, that's all there is for entry level jobs besides dishwashing. So it's either I'm a dishwasher indefinitely or social security.

Anyways, I'm curious about other methods of anger management, besides walking away lol. I'm stuck working for a bit regardless, disability process takes a while.

My psychiatrist is willing to give me double the max psychiatric dosage of the bipolar medicine I'm on. Physically it's not dangerous they give seizure patients much more than that, but still I got issues haha and he sees it. I'm working the dose up slowly as we have to. I"m hoping the antimanics help. Well not hoping they do help significantly I just hope they help enough to where i can keep working. Never made it as high as he said he's willing to prescribe me, so I'll see.

I don't know much about anger management personally, but I've learned that anger releases hormones in the body such as adrenaline, noradrenaline, and cortisol. For this reason, anger can become mildly addictive. This also explains why "walking it off" can work to release anger as the act of walking is a low stress exercise that will convert the hormones to energy. The connection between anger and stress may mean there is a stress-anger connection. This is similar to how some people can get irritable after drinking too much coffee as coffee causes the release of stress hormones in the body.
I have also heard that is can be difficult to maintain the emotion of anger when you are experiencing the emotion of love. This is the inspiration for certain kinds of love meditations, where you focus on the feeling of love in your heart as a counter to feelings of anger. Love releases a different set of hormones than anger releases. Love releases oxytocin, dopamine, and seratonin, which are also mindly addictive but in a different way.
If I had an anger management problem, I would avoid coffee or other substances or situations that induce stress reactions, use exercise to expend my excess free anger, and try to learn to displace anger with love meditations and free time pursuit of things that will bring a more positive outlook.
Because of the deeper complexities of emotions, I wouldn't necessarily judge my anger as bad, but instead consider if I'm experiencing a power issue. Anger can make a person feel very powerful and I would examine how to release control and let go of power. If there is a situation that is causing me to feel particuarly helpless or vulnerable. I would take the time to examine that and either solve, resolve, or come to terms with it. There is also the concept of a healthy release of anger. However that requires an appropriate situation - not something you can just do.
Laughter also releases endorphins and can be a healthy way to release tensions in the body. Perhaps this could be used to mitigate anger issues.
Sadness is also an emotion that will release cortisol, There might be a connection between sadness and anger. It may be possible to identify a particular stress event.
Aside from all the emotional factors that feed into and come out of hormone imbalance. I would, if it were me, be looking at how to improve my diet. Find an expert who can advise on foods to avoid (obviously avoid sugar and alcohol) and some foods to make sure to get more of. It can be important to properly support your neurotranmitters with the appropriate foods, vitamins, etc.

These are my thoughts and they are some of the things I would look into, if I were suffering difficulty managing my anger or if I were bipolar, or experiencing a chronic emotional imbalance. And, of course, religion.

 

[PureX]

Started attending anger management group again this past week.

Was wondering if anyone has gone through anger management courses or knows anything about anger management in general.

I do not, but I sincerely wish you the best from this endeavor.