Noirhaired
Member
I was reading over this and I think some very important points have been overlooked.
Last summer, as part of a psychology class and community intervention credit, I volunteered teaching with a community outreach counselor about sexual education. The average age of the group, about 15 kids, was 11. They were from inner-city, low-income backgrounds and varied ethnicities. I was in one of 5 different classrooms.
Someone here mentioned that birth control was supposed to overcome something. While I think that birth control is a GOOD thing and can serve as intervention and prevention for many things, it is not an end-all, cure-all. Many of the preteens' conceptions regarding birth control (pardon the pun!) is that it was almost a "cure" and using it means nothing "bad could happen to you" meaning STD's, pregnancy, etc. I think that there is a huge misconception regarding this because while birth control serves as a prevention method, which can be very accurate, it does not mean that "nothing can happen to you", which leads many children to believe that they are still invincible and can do whatever they want whenever they want, which is NOT true. Just because you "think" you are old enough to have sex and are having sex, and are using birth control, does not mean you are ready. Many of these children thought otherwise.
There are laws regarding age of consent for a good reason. Many of these ages are set because it's done in the best interest for these children. Many states have age 16, and some have 18. These are typically the ages where children are able to make choices in good conscience for themselves without an adult's intervention. That also entails the knowledge of following through with responsibilities for your actions as well-- for instance, an 11 year old is hardly going to know how to deal with an unexpected pregnancy where as a 17 or 18 year old will at least have the maturity to think about their future actions, resources, etc.
I know that 4 out of 5 Americans have had premarital sex and don't believe in waiting until marriage, but many people believe in having sex in committed, stable, loving relationships where they will be responsible for their actions. There is a GOOD reason why sex is associated with pregnancy, relationships, love, std's, etc. Sex is not just some animalistic, biological drive that we can wipe our hands clean of, and I think we need to teach that to our young people.
I don't think requesting that the appropriate age for sex should coincide with being mature enough to handle the consequences of pregnancy, std's, marriage, etc. That's the appropriate age for sex. Many people believe that sex does not include strings attached and it does.
As far as children having sex when we don't think they're ready-- WHY are they having sex in the first place? And no sorry I don't buy any of that "their bodies were ready, so it doesn't matter" crap. I know this may not be the best analogy, but you could easily say "well I'm going to overeat, so it doesn't matter" or "well, my kid is going to do things I don't like or want, so it doesn't matter, because it will happen anyway"
Self-control is something that it not taught and self-control is not taught in good respect. Many young children nowadays lack the preparedness and delayed gratification that older generations have been taught to accept and live by. And that is OUR fault. Instead of teaching the "me, me, me, what I want, what my body wants now" mentality, we should be approaching these issues holistically. I know I seem really riled up, but after assisting the counselor the past summer it's really opened my eyes at the excuses we often use regarding this issue.
Last summer, as part of a psychology class and community intervention credit, I volunteered teaching with a community outreach counselor about sexual education. The average age of the group, about 15 kids, was 11. They were from inner-city, low-income backgrounds and varied ethnicities. I was in one of 5 different classrooms.
Someone here mentioned that birth control was supposed to overcome something. While I think that birth control is a GOOD thing and can serve as intervention and prevention for many things, it is not an end-all, cure-all. Many of the preteens' conceptions regarding birth control (pardon the pun!) is that it was almost a "cure" and using it means nothing "bad could happen to you" meaning STD's, pregnancy, etc. I think that there is a huge misconception regarding this because while birth control serves as a prevention method, which can be very accurate, it does not mean that "nothing can happen to you", which leads many children to believe that they are still invincible and can do whatever they want whenever they want, which is NOT true. Just because you "think" you are old enough to have sex and are having sex, and are using birth control, does not mean you are ready. Many of these children thought otherwise.
There are laws regarding age of consent for a good reason. Many of these ages are set because it's done in the best interest for these children. Many states have age 16, and some have 18. These are typically the ages where children are able to make choices in good conscience for themselves without an adult's intervention. That also entails the knowledge of following through with responsibilities for your actions as well-- for instance, an 11 year old is hardly going to know how to deal with an unexpected pregnancy where as a 17 or 18 year old will at least have the maturity to think about their future actions, resources, etc.
I know that 4 out of 5 Americans have had premarital sex and don't believe in waiting until marriage, but many people believe in having sex in committed, stable, loving relationships where they will be responsible for their actions. There is a GOOD reason why sex is associated with pregnancy, relationships, love, std's, etc. Sex is not just some animalistic, biological drive that we can wipe our hands clean of, and I think we need to teach that to our young people.
I don't think requesting that the appropriate age for sex should coincide with being mature enough to handle the consequences of pregnancy, std's, marriage, etc. That's the appropriate age for sex. Many people believe that sex does not include strings attached and it does.
As far as children having sex when we don't think they're ready-- WHY are they having sex in the first place? And no sorry I don't buy any of that "their bodies were ready, so it doesn't matter" crap. I know this may not be the best analogy, but you could easily say "well I'm going to overeat, so it doesn't matter" or "well, my kid is going to do things I don't like or want, so it doesn't matter, because it will happen anyway"
Self-control is something that it not taught and self-control is not taught in good respect. Many young children nowadays lack the preparedness and delayed gratification that older generations have been taught to accept and live by. And that is OUR fault. Instead of teaching the "me, me, me, what I want, what my body wants now" mentality, we should be approaching these issues holistically. I know I seem really riled up, but after assisting the counselor the past summer it's really opened my eyes at the excuses we often use regarding this issue.