As I begin exploring the wide, wide world of spirituality, I've come to see my ancestors as people who can help me along this journey. My only question is, how to go about asking for their help. And perhaps I'll be including nature spirits to this list as well as I get my toes wet and figure out where it is I want to go.
I know some people set up an ancestral altar and make offerings, along with formal prayers. Is this the acceptable way of doing things, or is it also acceptable to simply call out and ask for guidance spontaneously without any formalized ritual?
I find it best to start with your closest relatives who have passed away and then go back. If you have close relatives that have passed away, and you know them well, then, in my view, they would be one of the first options of knowing your ancestors since they are closer to them than you are.
Building a genealogy tree and learning your roots is another good place to start. For example, my family has deep rooted seeds in slavery, southern US culture, and christian beliefs mixed with other practices here and there. Although I'm not christian, I pay my respects in the manner they'd find it appropriate. For example, when I took the sacraments, I experienced the spirit of jesus. I know everyone has a spirit regardless of who they are and how people portray them. So I may sign the cross or say a short prayer in their honor. It also helps remind me of the sacraments I took (saying hi to an old friend) without feeling confined to a belief system I oppose to.
Ancestral altars are good second option to going to your loved ones resting place. There is no "right way" to set up an altar unless you are following a specific path that has regulations for connecting with the spirits and ancestors. If you decide to connect to your ancestors through the loved ones you knew well, what do they like as in food, drink, music, art, and so forth? Is there something between the two of you that you can continue on regardless of their physical presence in your life?
Talk to your family as if they are physically here. There is no "special way" to talk to ancestors just because they are spirit. It just means they transitioned from one part of life into another since nothing dies we just go in a cycle. You speak to them as you speak to your living relatives.
Here are two sites I like:
1.
Five ways to honor your ancestors
2.
Interview by Randy Peyser: Accessing the Wisdom of Our Ancestors
The second is an interview with Sobonfu Some. It will give you an idea of one of thousands of traditions that honor one's ancestors. It's not for instruction.