At what age is it appropriate for children to witness a heterosexual couple kissing?

[Valjean]

What's meant by "appropriate?"
There seems to be an idea that children will find certain things disturbing or shocking, and must be shielded from them. I'm skeptical.
To a child, everything is new, everything strange and perplexing.
What gets normalized is what's experienced. Children learn what's weird and what's unremarkable. They're not born to find sex shocking and weeding the garden mundane. They learn what's appropriate vs inappropriate.

If you don't want your child to find kissing upsetting, nudity tittilating, &c, don't teach that to them by hiding it or being shocked, yourself.
What you treat as ordinary a child will learn is ordinary.

 

[stvdv]

I remember being young, and my sister(who was about 4) challenging my parents to kiss... she had never seen them do such a thing. They assured her that they loved each other, but she insisted... oh, the distasteful peck on the lips they gave each other!

Perhaps I'd have less discomfort with emotion if I'd been exposed to it as a youngster.

Nice proof.

There is 1 easy way to transform such emotions, takes a lot of effort

 

[Mock Turtle]

Like so many others, I think that kids should see natural behaviour like kissing from the start so as to see it as being very normal - hopefully. I can't ever remember seeing my parents kissing, and it was probably when I was about 13 and had to share a room with them on holiday once that I even witnessed (heard) them in bed and probably having some fun together - whilst I tried to sleep and give the impression I was asleep. Not a lot of affection shown between them, after WWII, but no fighting or shouting either. My mother was sexually abused as a child though, so this might have been a factor.

 

[Wildswanderer]

What's meant by "appropriate?"
There seems to be an idea that children will find certain things disturbing or shocking, and must be shielded from them. I'm skeptical.
To a child, everything is new, everything strange and perplexing.
What gets normalized is what's experienced. Children learn what's weird and what's unremarkable. They're not born to find sex shocking and weeding the garden mundane. They learn what's appropriate vs inappropriate.

If you don't want your child to find kissing upsetting, nudity tittilating, &c, don't teach that to them by hiding it or being shocked, yourself.
What you treat as ordinary a child will learn is ordinary.

Yes because letting your kids run around naked everywhere is going to go over well and prepare them for the real world...

 

[Valjean]

Yes because letting your kids run around naked everywhere is going to go over well and prepare them for the real world...

I don't follow. Conventionalism indoctrination is desirable?
Isn't indoctrination into traditional notions of propriety problematic, and likely to stifle progress, freedom,and creativity, and lead to needless repression in future?

What harm do you see in letting kids run around naked, to use your own odd example?

 

[Wildswanderer]

I don't follow. Conventionalism indoctrination is desirable?
Isn't indoctrination into traditional notions of propriety problematic, and likely to stifle progress, freedom,and creativity, and lead to needless repression in future?

What harm do you see in letting kids run around naked, to use your own odd example?

Depends on your tradition. You might think it's stifling and someone else might believe it's the opposite. Apparently you have a problem with traditional notions. That doesn't mean you get to apply it to others to or how they choose to parent.

 

[JustGeorge]

What harm do you see in letting kids run around naked, to use your own odd example?

Depends on your tradition. You might think it's stifling and someone else might believe it's the opposite. Apparently you have a problem with traditional notions. That doesn't mean you get to apply it to others to or how they choose to parent.

I discourage my son from running around naked for hygienic reasons. The one in question is autistic and sometimes struggles to keep clothes where they need to be. He sees nothing wrong in sitting on your pillow with bare bottom. So, best keep that bottom covered.

He also doesn't understand differences in rules for indoors/outdoors, so, again, best be consistent and wear clothes all the time.

And, strangely, nudity greatly upsets his older brother(who is also autistic), so best keep the clothes on for family harmony.

 

[Valjean]

Depends on your tradition. You might think it's stifling and someone else might believe it's the opposite. Apparently you have a problem with traditional notions. That doesn't mean you get to apply it to others to or how they choose to parent.

My point exactly. Laws and regulations shouldn't be based on tradition, but on utility and consequences. Their purpose is to promote the general welfare and happiness, while preventing people from harming or exploiting each other. Beyond this, live and let live.

My problem with tradition is traditionalists' tendency to repress or even outlaw new, unfamiliar or dissenting ideas, religions, or lifestyles; and even to mandate personal ideas of propriety.

 

[Wildswanderer]

My point exactly. Laws and regulations shouldn't be based on tradition, but on utility and consequences. Their purpose is to promote the general welfare and happiness, while preventing people from harming or exploiting each other. Beyond this, live and let live.

My problem with tradition is traditionalists' tendency to repress or even outlaw new, unfamiliar or dissenting ideas, religions, or lifestyles; and even to mandate personal ideas of propriety.

I wasn't talking about laws, don't know where that came from.

 

[Valjean]

I wasn't talking about laws, don't know where that came from.

OK, I'm confused. What are we talking about?

 

[Wildswanderer]

I discourage my son from running around naked for hygienic reasons. The one in question is autistic and sometimes struggles to keep clothes where they need to be. He sees nothing wrong in sitting on your pillow with bare bottom. So, best keep that bottom covered.

He also doesn't understand differences in rules for indoors/outdoors, so, again, best be consistent and wear clothes all the time.

And, strangely, nudity greatly upsets his older brother(who is also autistic), so best keep the clothes on for family harmony.

I had one who loved to run around naked... It's one thing when they're very small and at home, something entirely different in public.

 

[Wildswanderer]

OK, I'm confused. What are we talking about?

Displays of affection between adults around children... That's pretty much the question being discussed.

 

[stvdv]

I remember being young, and my sister(who was about 4) challenging my parents to kiss... she had never seen them do such a thing. They assured her that they loved each other, but she insisted... oh, the distasteful peck on the lips they gave each other!

Perhaps I'd have less discomfort with emotion if I'd been exposed to it as a youngster.

When I was in Indonesia and came back, people asked me "what was special about Indonesia". I answered like "the incredible affection mothers showed to children out in the open for all to see"

Christianity really did a number on people in the West (at least in Holland, seeing pictures of the past few 100 years) by imposing on them to suppress emotions and showing affection, resulting in cruel, mean sexual hidden misbehavior sometimes