Attitudes Towards Death and Dying.

[conradxiong]

Hi Everyone,

This is my first post here. I found out about this forum during a lecture at uni a couple of days ago. Looks like a great place.

Anyway, there's a (slightly dark, haha) topic that I would like to discuss, and I also have a survey to go with it. I will be using the results for some research I am doing.

The topic is attitudes towards death and dying. I think it's very interesting how for some people, religion can take away the fear of death. Having a strong faith in your beliefs will alleviate any worries that one has about what happens to your self, your body etc, as well as what one can expect to come after death. This is also the same for very non-religious people.

On the other hand, being not quite 100% faithful in your beliefs (or lack of belief) will probably mean you are more afraid of death.

I am also interested in the different reasons for fearing death across different religions and cultures. Some may fear judgment after death and others might fear the result of reincarnation. Many people are afraid of the idea of total 'nothingness' after death. One fear that is common amongst believers and non-believers is the interpersonal fear of death; what will happen to my friends, family etc?

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?

What are some reasons for fearing death?

What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?

Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?

If you have time please help me out by filling out this short anonymous survey.

EDIT: Just realised I can't post URLs for another 15 posts. Let's just discuss it for a while, I'll be back shortly with the link

I'll definitely keep you updated on the results.

Thank you.

 

[Sunstone]

I'm not so sure people with a strong faith or religious belief are less fearful of dying than people without such a strong faith or religious belief. Do you have some evidence of that?

 

[whereismynotecard]

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.
I wouldn't really say I am afraid of dying, but I really really don't want to die. It's difficult to explain. Let's compare it to doing a really long homework assignment. I'm not afraid of doing it, and it won't really be scary, but doing homework sucks, and I'd rather do other things. It's the same way with dying. It's not scary, but I know once I'm dead, my life is over, and I'd much rather keep living.

How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?
I suppose if I believed in an afterlife of some sort, death wouldn't seem so bad, because I'd think that I would get to see all of my family and friends again someday(assuming we went to the same place, in regard to heaven and hell) Not having any belief in the afterlife, however, I see absolutely no positive aspect of death rather than reducing the total population of the world, and the death of people who are molestors, murderers, or jerks.

I guess if I believed what some people belive about god and judgement and whatnot, I might be scared of going to hell, because according to lots of people, that's where I'm going. Because I don't believe that though, I'm not concerned about it.

What are some reasons for fearing death?
Because it's the end of everything.

What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?
Belief in afterlife and differences in cultural morals which when followed would get you into heaven or a good spot in reincarnation. (I feel like I'm taking a test)

Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?
Probably decrease, because no matter what someone does, eventually they won't be remembered, and nothing they did will have mattered in the long run. If everyone lived forever, I guess they could have meaning to each other, but really nothing has any grand meaning; only individual meaning to individual people.

 

[conradxiong]

I'm not so sure people with a strong faith or religious belief are less fearful of dying than people without such a strong faith or religious belief. Do you have some evidence of that?

Yea a study by Clifton Bryant (2003) found this. I'm sure there is more.

A sample of 372 people divided into 'very non-religious' 'non-religious' 'religious' 'very religious' found that the two groups who have most faith in their beliefs were least afraid of death.

The Leming Fear of Death Scale was used. I think you can find the whole study in the Handbook of Death and Dying Vol. 1.


Thanks for your input, whereismynotecard. I'm looking forward to more responses, especially once I put up the link to the survey.

 

[whereismynotecard]

Yaar Welcome.

 

[Beaudreaux]

Everyone who is sane is afraid to die. Religious people may claim that they are not because an eternal reward awaits them in the afterlife, but put them in a deadly situation and they will exhibit the same fear of death that everyone else has.

 

[BucephalusBB]

Everyone who is sane is afraid to die. Religious people may claim that they are not because an eternal reward awaits them in the afterlife, but put them in a deadly situation and they will exhibit the same fear of death that everyone else has.

There is a difference in being afraid to die or being afraid of death. I rather not go through the dying process. However, I cannot see how I would be afraid of death.
Now I am not sure if you are calling me insane here now

 

[Enoch07]

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?

What are some reasons for fearing death?

What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?

Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?

Welcome to the forums.

Imho religion can give you the peace of mind needed to not fear death. I know what awaits us in the afterlife is infinitely greater than our experience in life.

I would venture to guess fearing the unknown, is why some fear death, this is why religion can help in that regards.

Hmm gonna leave the cultural question alone for now. That one is tricky. I will give one example that I have experienced first hand though.

In the region where I live when someone dies we usually have like a "party" at the funeral home. Everyone brings homemade food, we talk and laugh remembering the good times we had with the deceased. Almost like a family reunion but instead its a celebration of the deceased's life. There might be a few people who get emotional but in general the mood is light and optimistic.

I thought this was how funerals was supposed to be until I attended the funeral of one of my fiance's relatives who lived in a different region. I was in shock, everyone was crying, sad, and distraught. No food, drinks, or laughter. It was dark, somber, impersonal and frankly......depressing.

I would say it increases the meaning of life, but not to the point where life (my life) is the only thing that matters.

In response to Beaudreaux's comment, I would just like to leave an example.

I am not afraid to die. As in if I died of a heart attack, car accident, meteor landing on my head etc. That is ok with me. I am at peace with dying. It is my time whenever it is my time.

But if someone shoves a gun in my face, yes I will try to move out of the way because I do not want to die. Much different than fear. In this situation I have some control of the situation (especially since I pack hot lead myself!) and can do something about it therefore I will. If I did take a bullet in the face anyways, I would still be at peace because I am not afraid. Of course this is hard for anyone to understand unless they have the inner peace I speak of, but believe it or not, it is true.

 

[averageJOE]

Yea a study by Clifton Bryant (2003) found this. I'm sure there is more.

A sample of 372 people divided into 'very non-religious' 'non-religious' 'religious' 'very religious' found that the two groups who have most faith in their beliefs were least afraid of death.

The Leming Fear of Death Scale was used. I think you can find the whole study in the Handbook of Death and Dying Vol. 1.

I think there is a difference between being afriad of DEATH and being afraid of DYING. I think all of those 372 people would show the same level of fear if someone were to shove a loaded shotgun in their mouths. To me, thats being afraid of dying. The fear of death, I believe, is what one believes happens after you die.

Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

I accept the fact that one day I'll be dead. I don't necessarily fear death, but the idea of not being alive anymore is very sad.

How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?

For me, it cant. I think one of the "tools" early religions used was fear. They would scare their followers into believing that you will burn in eternal hell for not believing. And I think a lot of people only follow a certain religion out of fear of what might happen to them after their death.

What are some reasons for fearing death?

The thought of not experiencing life anymore! I believe that this life is the true "heaven" and "hell". I believe this life is the ultimate in our existance. And after we die its all gone.

What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?

Some religions have people believe that this life is nothing but a preperation for the "after life". That our "true" lives are to be lived in heaven or hell. And that this life is a test to see where you end up. I believe none of this.

Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?

It greatly increases the meaning of life to me!! I believe that life should be lived to its fullest extent and that this life is NOT a test or preperation of some sort.


1. Life is the great indulgence - death, the great abstinence. Therefore, make the most of
life - HERE AND NOW!
2. There is no heaven of glory bright, and no hell where sinners roast. Here and now is
our day of torment! Here and now is our day of joy! Here and now is our opportunity!

 

[BruceDLimber]

Greetings!

For the nonce, I'll post this passage from the Baha'i scriptures, which I feel is a good summary of our attitude:

"O SON OF THE SUPREME!

"I have made death a messenger of joy to thee; wherefore dost thou grieve?
"I have made the light to shed on thee its splendor; why dost thou veil thyself therefrom?"

−The Hidden Words, Part One, #32

Best!

Bruce

 

[Twilight Hue]

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

I no longer fear death at all.

I find it very Ironic that people fear death, or perhaps more directly, towards what is regarded to be unknown, yet by the same token doesn't give a second thought as to what the conditions were prior to birth, or more accurately, prior to conception.

I always looked toward the fact that before "I" was born, "I" was dead, so when "I" become dead again, "I" will be born. The only thing that truly and absolutely dies in my view is "I". In other words, if the "I" came out of the black void once, there would be no reason it cant happen again under the right conditions. It would simply be a new unique "I".

It is a fact that we literally die every 7-9 years or so, as every single cell in the human body is replaced, so death is consistently being experienced even now. DNA structure and retention of a fair portion of memory is maintained in this process. Thus I view life and death simply as mirror images which are indistinguishable when regarded as a whole. Save for what the ego can conjure up, I find there is really nothing to be feared.

How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?

I view religion as an intermediary belief or practice to buffer what is unknown by providing answers and/or conditioning to face this inevitability. As far my attitude goes would certainly depend upon on what mood and or physical sensations are present at the moment.

What are some reasons for fearing death?

Most of my apprehension whenever it rises, would stem from what is mentally constructed involving "what if" scenarios involving pain and loss of motor function. Basically put, the mentally imagined process of death.

What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?

Confidence and calmness displayed in a demographic by people who are terminally ill or are already in the process of dying who are still able to communicate what they are experiencing first hand has been exceedingly useful in gaining some perspective and insight. Personally, I find a number of eastern cultures and religions to have been the most influential, most particularly Asian religion in my case.

Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?

While there is an importance in preparing and pontificating over death's inevitability's which obviously causes discomfort from time to time, there is on the other hand an appreciation for how life can be spent. Recognizing such a time is precious and valuable, as one can produce meaning from it before it passes away forever. Increasing or decreasing the meaning of life is strictly up to the person experiencing it.

 

[Ben Dhyan]

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

Hi conradxiong, it is my understanding that my life is the result of the incarnation of an aspect of universal spirit which vivifies and gives consciousness to this otherwise aggregate of cosmic material called Ben.

Now the purpose of universal spirit incarnating in a body is to develop a unique 'self'-awareness that is otherwise nor present in the pre-incarnation ubiquity of the source spirit. Now when the self-awareness is developed to the full extent required that can be coherently and permanent reintegrated with the universal spirit without the loss of the translated sense of individuation, then the purpose of the incarnation is complete and the soul/spirit will naturally leave the body which results in its death.

But so long as 'self'-awareness is not yet fully developed, the body is designed to prevent the soul from leaving the 'temple'. The main natural biological survival response designed into the body to prevent the soul from avoidable, accidental or premature death is one based on fear of death and the strong desire for physical existence.

Now due to my present level of development, when my health is OK, one like to imagine that the soul is mature and ready for departure from this world, but when ill health does occur (and at age 66, this occurs more frequently than before), there is a noticeable rise in my anxiety about the potential for death, and only dissipates again when my health recovers when once again death has no fears!

Woody Allen once quipped, "I'm not afraid of dying, its just that I don't want to be there when it happens!"

 

[DadBurnett]

Hi Everyone,

This is my first post here. I found out about this forum during a lecture at uni a couple of days ago. Looks like a great place.

Anyway, there's a (slightly dark, haha) topic that I would like to discuss, and I also have a survey to go with it. I will be using the results for some research I am doing.

The topic is attitudes towards death and dying. I think it's very interesting how for some people, religion can take away the fear of death. Having a strong faith in your beliefs will alleviate any worries that one has about what happens to your self, your body etc, as well as what one can expect to come after death. This is also the same for very non-religious people.

On the other hand, being not quite 100% faithful in your beliefs (or lack of belief) will probably mean you are more afraid of death.

I am also interested in the different reasons for fearing death across different religions and cultures. Some may fear judgment after death and others might fear the result of reincarnation. Many people are afraid of the idea of total 'nothingness' after death. One fear that is common amongst believers and non-believers is the interpersonal fear of death; what will happen to my friends, family etc?

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

I am also interested in the different reasons for fearing death across different religions and cultures. Some may fear judgment after death and others might fear the result of reincarnation. Many people are afraid of the idea of total 'nothingness' after death. One fear that is common amongst believers and non-believers is the interpersonal fear of death; what will happen to my friends, family etc? Thank you.

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.
I have no fear concerning death. If I had to have a fear it would concern dying – the process leading up to death. My concern would be with pain and suffering, prolonged incapacitation and the burden placed on others by the process. I am fifty-two years older than you, and while death can occur at any age, the reality of dying is somehow more relevant today …

How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?
Religion gave me a foundation, a perspective and over time perspectives and understanding has evolved. This evolution was precipitated by the “early and unexpected” deaths of my father and daughter, as well as that of other family members and close friends. Rather than religion, it was spiritual experiences - primarily an ongoing deepening of a personal relationship with God and Christ - have provided insights and fanned the flames of faith.

What are some reasons for fearing death? As I said, I do not fear death.

What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?
I don’t know how to answer this question … it’s a bit too broad. Are you asking what could cause me to change my attitudes, or is this a more general question?

Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?
Knowing that I will die certainly adds a significant dimension to life … the “color, shape and energy” of that dimension is rooted in one’s religious beliefs and spiritual experiences. Age adds other dimensions, for example – I just had a new 30-year roof put on my house and a passing thought came – that roof is going to outlive me. Such thoughts did not occur to me when I was your age. Back to your question, I don’t know what the meaning of life is! I do have an evolving perception of what the purpose of my life is and knowing that I could die at any moment does indeed impact how I think and what I do.

 

[Falvlun]

I remember that when I was a strong Christian, I would sometimes pray that God would just kill me now and get it over with so that I could go straight to heaven. (Looking back on it, I believe I was a bit depressed in highschool...) The point being, anyway, that I did not fear death and looked forward to it, since no matter how great my life here on Earth was, it could not compare with Paradise.

I think my beliefs have a slightly healthier outlook now as an atheist, but I am now struggling with a slight dread of death. Nothing leads me to believe that there is life, or consciousness, or whatever after death, so once we die, that's it. The whole idea of nothingness freaks me out a little bit, even though I know there won't be an "I" around to be freaked out about it. It is also a little depressing that once you're dead, that's it.

 

[EverChanging]

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

I have always felt like I had less fear of death than most people. As someone who has suffered from a psychological disorder (it might be more proper to say a myriad of disorders or symptoms classified as one disorder), I have thought about death a lot. I also think about it because of my early bizarre experiences with religion and my contemplative, philosophical nature, something I've always had. I think I fear ways of dying more than death itself. I would fear death if it came before I had a chance to have certain experiences or if it were to come about in a very undignified way, such as suicide due to depression. On the other hand, death itself does not seem like a scary thing to me. I see death as the end of my consciousness. I am unable to comprehend that because I only understand reality through consciousness. Therefore, I conceptualize it as a peaceful void, a type of nirvana, where all desires are distinguished, a type of negative joy (the absence of pain), being, at-one-ment. In a way, I look forward to it, but I hope that my transition to it is peaceful. Then it might be rather beautiful.

How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?

It depends upon which religion. Some religions comfort people by promising eternal life, or scaring people with eternal damnation and/or purgatory or other realms of punishment or purification -- purification that might be painful. Other religious people, even those who believe in an afterlife, might not dwell on it so much, but find acceptance of death in their own way and arrive at a type of peace. This is my impression of Christians who believe in some sort of afterlife, but are undecided as to what form it will take or whether we will live on individually.

What are some reasons for fearing death?

Death is something we really can't comprehend because it represents the unknown or we can't conceive of not having consciousness, not existing, even though there are periods in our lives where we are not conscious. Death might be scary if we want to have certain experiences or have obligations, like caring for children, etc.

What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?

Some believe in an eternal heaven and hell. Others believe in universalism. Some believe in reincarnation and karma, and beliefs about reincarnation vary -- some think we only come back as humans, others that we can come back as plants and animals. Some people think reincarnation is instantaneous. Others don't. Some believe in no afterlife at all. Others think we are absorbed into a higher consciousness like drops of water into a vast ocean. And there are many other beliefs out there, too.

I think a well-adjusted person will not be suicidal even if they believe in a blissful afterlife and are having a very difficult life here on Earth. A non-so-well ad justed person might endlessly ponder an afterlife realm, wanting an escape. When I believed in some form of an afterlife, I became obsessed with it, wanting an escape, and had no fear of death at all -- but this wasn't healthy. When my mental health began to improve, even though I still believed in an afterlife for a long time, I was no longer suicidal.

Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?

I can only conceive of life within the context of death. Therefore, death enriches life with meaning, but death would have no meaning without life. They are interdependent and give meaning to one another. If life existed without death, perhaps I could find meaning in it, but I really don't know because that is not the life I experience. It is difficult to think life could have much meaning or sense of continuity if I was still alive after a trillion trillion years.

 

[Copernicus]

Every living organism that can fear, fears death. Fear of death is what inspired all of the ancient religions. The pyramids are a testament to the strength of that fear. The earliest recorded religious epic--the Sumerian tale of Bilgames (Gilgamesh in Akkadian) was about fear of death and the quest for immortality. Religion has other functions than merely to assuage the fear of death, but coping with death is a central theme in most religions.

As an atheist, I cannot entertain the hope of escaping my eventual demise. At my stage in life, I am more and more conscious of my mortality, but death still remains as abstract to me as my lack of existence before my earliest memories. In a sense, I experience death every time I lose consciousness in a deep sleep or under general anaesthesia during the few operations I've undergone in the past. Death is lack of consciousness, so there is nothing really to fear in that. What I most fear is the suffering that often precedes death and the sense that one's ability to gain new experiences and experience new and remembered pleasures is coming to an end. I feel that I have not learned enough of this existence, and I want to go on learning more. I also fear the effect my death will have on my wife (who I assume will outlive me). So those are the concerns that occupy my mind when I think about death.

 

[Wannabe Yogi]

Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying.

Woody Allen said: It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

 

[Alceste]

"Please share your thoughts. Explain why you are or aren't afraid of dying."

I am a little afraid of pain and suffering, but that can happen any time - not just when I'm getting around to dying, so I don't associate it with death. At this moment I have no more fear of my post-death non-existence than I have fear of the non-existence I did not experience before I was born. To me, it's the same.

"How can religion alter your attitude towards death and dying?"

I can not imagine a religious attitude toward death and dying. My totally unsubstantiated guess, though, is that the belief in another paradise after death considerably devalues our experience of the miracle of life, and reduces our willingness to step carefully in this paradise. That would be Abrahamic religions, which believe that after death they'll live forever in a better world and never have to come back to earth. Oriental religions have totally different sociological implications.

"What are some reasons for fearing death?"

I expect it's possible that very close to the end of my life, I might experience fear of the moment of death, or of the transition from existence to non-existence. It would be a reasonable reaction - like jumping off a cliff in a dark, strange cave - maybe there's a nice warm hot spring just two feet down, or maybe there's a freezing cold, raging underground river hundreds of feet down. You just don't know - nobody knows. The unknown is a scary thing.

"What are some cultural and religious differences that could influence death attitudes?"

My philosophical and metaphysical views are not easily influenced by culture or religion, so I can't tell you that either.

"Does the inevitability of death increase or decrease the meaning of life for you?"

It increases it. I don't believe in any kind of afterlife, or any paradise or reincarnation. I believe I get one shot - one life span, and this is it. I get one paradise, and this is it. The meaning, purpose and moral perspective of my own life is hugely influenced by my non-belief in afterlife, but I can't compare it to what it would have been like to believe life continues after death, since I'm unable to imagine believing in such a thing.

"If you have time please help me out by filling out this short anonymous survey."

You could always write out your link like "religiousforums dot com" if you like.

 

[Danarch]

I will no longer be able to play any MMORPG's when i die. Everything else is just FLUFF

 

[Falvlun]

I find it very Ironic that people fear death, or perhaps more directly, towards what is regarded to be unknown, yet by the same token doesn't give a second thought as to what the conditions were prior to birth, or more accurately, prior to conception.

Thanks. That is a helpful way of looking at it.