Conversation

[The Hammer]

I find the toughest thing about living alone and being single for 40 years is having someone to talk to. And yeah, it's generally the little things that nag at you and you want that someone who understands you to bounce that verbal ball off of. ------ Your friend using you. A neighbor with deep personal struggles that is tearing you apart cause there's nothing more you can do. That totally rude woman at the grocery store. Another friend whose age is showing and it's concerning. ------- All little nothings in life that if you vented outside of a trustworthy safe place, would be gossip, so you keep them to yourself.

I stayed with an abusive drug user for far too long because in this respect he was the greatest companion ever. So I am missing something I once had. My father was excellent to lean on as well.

Personal worries and fears of a bigger sort I've also learned to keep to myself. Though my sons are well grownup, they're still my children and seeing fear in their faces if my health has a wobble is enough to shut my mouth and laugh off any slips.

So, yeah, give me a little small talk every now and then. The cat listens well sometimes and sometimes he leaves the room.

If you ever wanna talk, my inbox is always open.

Seconded

 

[We Never Know]

I find the toughest thing about living alone and being single for 40 years is having someone to talk to. And yeah, it's generally the little things that nag at you and you want that someone who understands you to bounce that verbal ball off of. ------ Your friend using you. A neighbor with deep personal struggles that is tearing you apart cause there's nothing more you can do. That totally rude woman at the grocery store. Another friend whose age is showing and it's concerning. ------- All little nothings in life that if you vented outside of a trustworthy safe place, would be gossip, so you keep them to yourself.

I stayed with an abusive drug user for far too long because in this respect he was the greatest companion ever. So I am missing something I once had. My father was excellent to lean on as well.

Personal worries and fears of a bigger sort I've also learned to keep to myself. Though my sons are well grownup, they're still my children and seeing fear in their faces if my health has a wobble is enough to shut my mouth and laugh off any slips.

So, yeah, give me a little small talk every now and then. The cat listens well sometimes and sometimes he leaves the room.

Do you do any social participation besides online forums like volunteering, bingo, classes such as art, etc.

 

[Spice]

Do you do any social participation besides online forums like volunteering, bingo, classes such as art, etc.

Oh yeah, I stay busy. I get lots of "small talk." And even some deep subject conversations. I'm just absent that "safe" place. Small communities love gossip, and that's most definitely not my thing, so careful she goes! LOL

 

[We Never Know]

Oh yeah, I stay busy. I get lots of "small talk." And even some deep subject conversations. I'm just absent that "safe" place. Small communities love gossip, and that's most definitely not my thing, so careful she goes! LOL

Yes small communities love gossip and story strectching.
I grew up in a small town where you could cut you finger on one side of town and by the time the story reached the others side of town you had lost your arm lol

 

[Balthazzar]

I don't think small talk is pointless at all. It may not be easy for some (typically introverts and those that spend most of their time in their heads).

Small talk is laying the foundation to build future conversations upon. You don't just talk the "meaning of life" with someone; without first knowing their family, how their day has been, and whether or not they are weathering the weather well.

It's a way to signal a desire to connect or disconnect socially, based upon the way one responds to the small talk as well.

If I say "hi, how's your day", and I get a "fine" in response with little else. I assume that they don't want to talk. If I say "how's your day" and the response is "it was good/bad/alright, how about you?", I know the floor is open to further conversation.

To get to deeper topics takes time and an intimacy with the person we are talking to that doesn't come from a few brief interactions.

Humor is on my top 5 list of choices when interacting with people. Sometimes I'm dry, other times I'm sarcastic, other times you won't know it but I'll be laughing on the inside. It can be irritating but that's ok. I called chocolate cake peanut butter cake through an entire meal once, commenting about how great the peanut butter cake was. The unsweetened tea served with it made for a great conversation too. I didn't even need to say anything about the tea. I'd squinch my face up, take a bite of cake and comment about how good it was.

 

[Balthazzar]

Anyway, it can be difficult to involve myself in small talk, so humor seems to get me through the awkward stages of meeting people and getting to know them. The goof in me plays out loud more often than it probably should, but that's ok...The looks on people's faces are priceless enough sometimes for the memories to be worth keeping.

 

[Evangelicalhumanist]

Its Gorgonzola that I can't stand the smell of.

Just making smalltalk, but Gorgonzola is one of the 3 greatest blue cheeses on earth, along with Stilton and Roquefort. Essential parts of my life, truly!

 

[JustGeorge]

Just making smalltalk, but Gorgonzola is one of the 3 greatest blue cheeses on earth, along with Stilton and Roquefort. Essential parts of my life, truly!

I want to like it. The taste is good, if I hold my nose.

But I can't do the smell...

 

[JustGeorge]

Anyway, it can be difficult to involve myself in small talk, so humor seems to get me through the awkward stages of meeting people and getting to know them. The goof in me plays out loud more often than it probably should, but that's ok...The looks on people's faces are priceless enough sometimes for the memories to be worth keeping.

I think we'd get along great, then. I'm terrible with small talk.

I find I often have to consider my humor... dial it in... My oddities... let them out slowly... It is a damned headache, really.

But yeah. The looks on their faces.