The traits I value most are the ones sorely lacking.
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Desirable Personality Traits in a Friend or Romantic Partner
- Thread starter Debater Slayer
- Start date
*nods* Extra horsepower is only a good thing if you know how to drive.
Otherwise it can be a liability.
And it does you no good at all if you don't know where you're going (it'll just get you lost faster).
One exception is towing a trailer uphill.
No skill over & above general towing expertise is needed.
A lot of people are too.
Until you get over the crest and start going downhill.
Then, normal trailing skills suffice, becauseA lot of people are too.
Until you get over the crest and start going downhill.
one is braking, not applying power.
Oh, I wish I had engine braking on Mr Van.
Depends on how big the load your hauling.
And what kind of shape your brakes are in.
(If we're going to milk a metaphor this much might as well use it to make cheese.
)
My brakes are all great.Depends on how big the load your hauling.
And what kind of shape your brakes are in.
(If we're going to milk a metaphor this much might as well use it to make cheese.
I regularly have them serviced & replaced.
And I've upgraded my electrical connection to something
more reliable than those troublesome 7-blade connectors...
EZ Connector magnetic waterproof sealed reliable electrical
Best reliable corrosion resistant magnetic trailer connector plug
ezconnector.com
Secret Chief
Veteran Member
Authenticity
I want the person to be real.
Calmness
I don't like to be around people with short fuses.
Empathy
There's more to the living world than your own perceived self.
Humour
Apart from anything else, without this a person will just conclude I'm somewhat deranged.
I want the person to be real.
Calmness
I don't like to be around people with short fuses.
Empathy
There's more to the living world than your own perceived self.
Humour
Apart from anything else, without this a person will just conclude I'm somewhat deranged.
Intelligence, I value being intellectually challenged most.
Ok now, that's never been proven.
Idk Man, most people consider me intellectually challenged and I can tell you it's not all it's cracked up to be.
Secret Chief
Veteran Member
OK, there's none more solipsistic than me, but I'm provisionally accepting there's "something out there" for the purposes of this thread.
It was a joke.
I chose them all. And I would add others, although there might be some overlap with existing categories such as kindness and generosity. Reliability, loyalty, generosity, industrious, clean, and tolerant are all very desirable qualities. And there are deal killers that negate the rest, although one might not call them all personality traits, like smoking. Addictive personality is one. Can't be on time is another. Being religious or conservative are negatives, but, unless they characterize the person, I can live with those.
Smoking would be an absolute dealbreaker for me in a romantic partner. Unless they fully quit and stayed off nicotine for at least a few months, I wouldn't be able to commit to a relationship.
With friends, it depends: I'm friends with a few smokers, but they never smoke in my company. They know I genuinely can't breathe properly when someone lights up near me. Either they or I just get up and take a brief walk when they want to smoke, and we both understand each other's boundaries.
Conservatism and religion also vary for me: I'm friends with a lot of conservatives and religious people, but if acceptance isn't mutual, I don't bother. If I don't feel safe enough to respectfully tell them about my identity, I know we can't be friends, because they all express their beliefs openly with me (e.g., when they pray or share their opinion on a piece of news) and don't have to worry about unsafety or mockery. In a romantic relationship, though, I absolutely couldn't see myself being with a social conservative or the "poor people deserve what they get" type of libertarian or fiscal conservative. I would most likely see that as a sign of a compromised sense of empathy on their part.
Religion per se isn't an issue for me whether in a friend or romantic partner, though: I don't care what someone's religious beliefs are unless they inspire social conservatism or, say, belief in Hell for non-believers. Those seem to me harmful beliefs that extend beyond personal spirituality.
As far as romantic interest goes, I would also be more wary of beliefs that encourage proselytizing or condition "salvation" on belief, because that could mean later problems in the relationship due to my non-belief. Aside from that, I know that many religious people are progressive and empathetic, more so than a lot of atheists, so I couldn't care less whether someone is religious or not when I get to know them.
Secret Chief
Veteran Member
Oh, ok.
