Emotional vs Physical Pain

[The Sum of Awe]

I realized today, I very easily can stand physical pain, in fact being that I've put up with it (I tend to start fights with my friends or else they start fights with me) that may be the reason, but a punch to the face only hurts me a for a while, physical pain goes away.

Emotional pain I can't deal with though. Yes, I do have emotions if that surprises you all , but very seldom I don't take things seriously, that's why I don't have emotional pain very often, and when I do I can keep it inside very well, but there are times when I can't.

No, I hardly ever find myself wiping tears from my eyes or getting very angry and put a hole through the wall, when I have emotional pain that I can't ignore I usually just not show it physically, it doesn't release at all physically.


Now I had an idea after realizing this. A friend of mine is very introverted, and I believe that nobody is introverted, just that they don't hang out with the right people. A lot of those who believe they're introverted on this forum, I'm sure would not be in the case of meeting one of their friends from this forum. I'm thinking about kicking my friend out of my group, for a friendly reason. He's not the kind of guy who likes to be rough and I can't find it fun to not be full of energy.

This brought me to the thought, why do my friends and I don't feel much STRONG emotional pain, but the "introverted" one does?

Drawing from the fact that he is serious into working and only enjoys certain kind of jokes that are partially serious, I believe it may have something to do with being serious or not.

Why was the Joker always so happy? "Why so serious?"

I have a theory that seriousness brings emotional pain, and if you take nothing seriously (close to nothing at the least) you'll be fine.

I'm usually serious as you can see on the forums, but even on this forum I get stressed with debates.

If you're not serious, you wont feel pain. Could it be?

 

[Alex_G]

Perhaps expectations have a lot do do with what pain one feels aswell. By being less attached to such expectations in life one might free themselves from a lot of potential hurt. However i wonder what you sacrifice in doing that.

 

[Kerr]

I realized today, I very easily can stand physical pain, in fact being that I've put up with it (I tend to start fights with my friends or else they start fights with me) that may be the reason, but a punch to the face only hurts me a for a while, physical pain goes away.

Emotional pain I can't deal with though. Yes, I do have emotions if that surprises you all , but very seldom I don't take things seriously, that's why I don't have emotional pain very often, and when I do I can keep it inside very well, but there are times when I can't.

No, I hardly ever find myself wiping tears from my eyes or getting very angry and put a hole through the wall, when I have emotional pain that I can't ignore I usually just not show it physically, it doesn't release at all physically.


Now I had an idea after realizing this. A friend of mine is very introverted, and I believe that nobody is introverted, just that they don't hang out with the right people. A lot of those who believe they're introverted on this forum, I'm sure would not be in the case of meeting one of their friends from this forum. I'm thinking about kicking my friend out of my group, for a friendly reason. He's not the kind of guy who likes to be rough and I can't find it fun to not be full of energy.

This brought me to the thought, why do my friends and I don't feel much STRONG emotional pain, but the "introverted" one does?

Drawing from the fact that he is serious into working and only enjoys certain kind of jokes that are partially serious, I believe it may have something to do with being serious or not.

Why was the Joker always so happy? "Why so serious?"

I have a theory that seriousness brings emotional pain, and if you take nothing seriously (close to nothing at the least) you'll be fine.

I'm usually serious as you can see on the forums, but even on this forum I get stressed with debates.

If you're not serious, you wont feel pain. Could it be?

Seems like escaping the problem rather then dealing with it to me.

 

[Quagmire]

My beleif, Sum, is that the trick is not to take yourself too seriously.

Most emotional pain is either aggravated or actually caused by self-importance.

One of my favorite quotes from the Tao Te Ching:

"He who knows how to live need not fear death. He can walk without fear of rhino or tiger. He will not be wounded in battle.... In him the rhino can find no place to thrust his horn, the tiger no place to use his claws, and weapons no place to pierce.... Because a man who knows how to live has no place for death to enter." -Master Po (quoting the TAO TE CHING chapter #50 [F])

To apply this to emotional pain, the way I interpret it is that the bigger your ego is, the bigger a target you are. The more you have invested in your self-image, the more vulnerable you are to all the "rhinos" (ignorant people), tigers (aggressive and or/sadistic people), and weapons (just the inevitable ups and downs of life).

On the other hand, someone who identifies primarily with something besides the self: a cause, a tribe, a community, an ideal, or just life/the world in general, "has no place for death to enter". There is no "me" for bad things to happen to.

That's the theory anyway.

 

[Orias]

Introversion isn't something that can really be articulated. Its not about being anti social or being more serious than others, its just self confinement and needing time to socially recharge. Introverts don't need to say everything on their mind, and they don't need to rely on the interpretation of others to feel comfortable with what they are perceiving.

Some people are energized by socializing and some people are drained by it, I tend to be the latter. Everyone needs to talk with other people though, everyone needs the communication and that connection.

Physical pain is a rarity for me as well, I can handle getting punched and kicked all over (I grew up with it!) and as far as emotion goes I tend to be in the same boat as you. I don't necessarily cage it up, but I try and find healthy ways to express it. Which is why I post here, and for the most part which is why I believe a lot of the people post here.

There is no such thing as taking something too seriously or not taking it seriously enough, because when it matters there will always be someone to say, "hey, thats not what I meant by that". Do you understand what I mean here?

I can't laugh at all intended jokes either, humor is a personal and self defined thing. I have some personal relationships with some of the people on the forum here, and by that I mean I talk with some of them by phone and some of them I have met in real real life.

Some people just don't like being rough, I don't have many friends in my life outside the forum because I simply don't care, most of them are interested in things I am not and others are just too preoccupied with their own things to realize whats going on with my life. I have no problem with this, maybe your friend holds back a lot, which in my opinion is the ultimate form of expression.

Rough housing can get personal sometimes, and from my experience growing up as a child, when I was being messed with or when I got into rough housing it wasn't for fun, but for "playfully" establishing dominance. I was always on the receiving end, therefore I don't find enjoyment in rough housing because in my mind (and I'd assume in a lot of other peoples minds) it leads to more serious things (like establishing dominance).

Like if some guy I barely knew started pushing me around and he thought of it as a joke how do you think I would react, more importantly, if some guy you didn't know started pushing you around while laughing and smiling what do you think is going through his mind and how would you react? Even if you know the person, do you think these types of things are justified by "rough housing" or do you think there is a deeper psychological motivation behind it?

I personally don't like to tolerate those things, competition is healthy and necessary for most. But I feel like if someone has to warn someone one or two times then its already gone too far, the person likely feels threatened and at this point its emotional, not for the sake of "rough housing".

And often, emotional pain is a physical result. Like when I was kid, if I got beat up it wasn't because I was physically hurt (I mean yea I would be physically hurt) but thats not why I would feel pain or cry, I would do that because I felt emotionally attacked. Which can amplify the pain that is physically felt.

One must learn to channel this in a healthy way, I've had some pretty rough interactions here on the forum, and some of them have even kept me up all night (like I don't do that already), but in the end we have our friends and honestly if it weren't for the forums I'd probably still be heading down the path I was before I found the forums.

If your not serious though, I think thats when you feel the most pain because its almost like you see it as a joke, and people aren't laughing with you, they're laughing at you. What hurts the most is when you know something is harmful or causing pain to you, and you ignore it.

Its honestly why I feel the need to lock myself in a cage and fight with a half naked man, its the best release because its not truly personal. In the end, when we both stand beaten and bloody we give each other a heart felt hug and I always tell them "I love you", but not because it turns me on but because it means something to me. That this man just allowed me to test my physical abilities on him without worrying about him going and getting a gun and trying to kill me or exact revenge. Those types of things are left on the field, and that is where they remain.

Seriously though, if you take nothing seriously then its just like taking morphine when you need an antibiotic. You numb the pain, instead of curing the source. And one should only have to numb the pain, on their death bed.

Keep your chin up, and remember the five D's of dodgeball! Duck, dodge, dip, dive, and dodge!

Xeper!

 

[Penumbra]

I think there's a fine balance between taking things too seriously, and not taking things seriously enough.

I'm not sure where the optimal balance is, but if I could choose, I would want to take things a bit more seriously than I always have. Pretty much the number one criticism that all of my family and friends have of me is that I don't take things seriously, that I'm emotionally distant, that I don't have any emotional commitment or attachment, etc.

If you're not serious, you might not feel pain, but you also might not feel almost anything at all.

 

[idav]

If you're not serious, you wont feel pain. Could it be?

That can be true. I think it is a matter of choice and null is always a choice available rather than always considering the negative or affirmative. It is possible to invest emotionally when appropriate and go back to a neutral state when things get overwhelming. So the ideal would be to actually choose when not to take things serious and choose when to allow yourself to be emotional in order to live life more fully.

 

[mickeyaarthur002]

Emotional vs physical pain
In the war of these two thing I think emotional always won because emotions are related with heart.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I realized today, I very easily can stand physical pain, in fact being that I've put up with it (I tend to start fights with my friends or else they start fights with me) that may be the reason, but a punch to the face only hurts me a for a while, physical pain goes away.

Emotional pain I can't deal with though. Yes, I do have emotions if that surprises you all , but very seldom I don't take things seriously, that's why I don't have emotional pain very often, and when I do I can keep it inside very well, but there are times when I can't.

No, I hardly ever find myself wiping tears from my eyes or getting very angry and put a hole through the wall, when I have emotional pain that I can't ignore I usually just not show it physically, it doesn't release at all physically.


Now I had an idea after realizing this. A friend of mine is very introverted, and I believe that nobody is introverted, just that they don't hang out with the right people. A lot of those who believe they're introverted on this forum, I'm sure would not be in the case of meeting one of their friends from this forum. I'm thinking about kicking my friend out of my group, for a friendly reason. He's not the kind of guy who likes to be rough and I can't find it fun to not be full of energy.

This brought me to the thought, why do my friends and I don't feel much STRONG emotional pain, but the "introverted" one does?

Drawing from the fact that he is serious into working and only enjoys certain kind of jokes that are partially serious, I believe it may have something to do with being serious or not.

Why was the Joker always so happy? "Why so serious?"

I have a theory that seriousness brings emotional pain, and if you take nothing seriously (close to nothing at the least) you'll be fine.

I'm usually serious as you can see on the forums, but even on this forum I get stressed with debates.

If you're not serious, you wont feel pain. Could it be?

Sort of. The key is what we Buddhists see as letting go of our attachments. It isn't so much that you just don't feel what you feel, but that you don't carry the experience with you after it's overwith.

It also isn't a complete withdrawal from sensory experience, because that is an attachment to detachment, if that makes any sense.

It's all about being completely and totally in the moment. No past. No future. No mental escape. No void. Just being, I think, is the key.

 

[AdityaMookerjee]

I realized today, I very easily can stand physical pain, in fact being that I've put up with it (I tend to start fights with my friends or else they start fights with me) that may be the reason, but a punch to the face only hurts me a for a while, physical pain goes away.

Emotional pain I can't deal with though. Yes, I do have emotions if that surprises you all , but very seldom I don't take things seriously, that's why I don't have emotional pain very often, and when I do I can keep it inside very well, but there are times when I can't.

No, I hardly ever find myself wiping tears from my eyes or getting very angry and put a hole through the wall, when I have emotional pain that I can't ignore I usually just not show it physically, it doesn't release at all physically.


Now I had an idea after realizing this. A friend of mine is very introverted, and I believe that nobody is introverted, just that they don't hang out with the right people. A lot of those who believe they're introverted on this forum, I'm sure would not be in the case of meeting one of their friends from this forum. I'm thinking about kicking my friend out of my group, for a friendly reason. He's not the kind of guy who likes to be rough and I can't find it fun to not be full of energy.

This brought me to the thought, why do my friends and I don't feel much STRONG emotional pain, but the "introverted" one does?

Drawing from the fact that he is serious into working and only enjoys certain kind of jokes that are partially serious, I believe it may have something to do with being serious or not.

Why was the Joker always so happy? "Why so serious?"

I have a theory that seriousness brings emotional pain, and if you take nothing seriously (close to nothing at the least) you'll be fine.

I'm usually serious as you can see on the forums, but even on this forum I get stressed with debates.

If you're not serious, you wont feel pain. Could it be?

I can't stand physical pain. It seems, a person wants to inflict physical pain, to hurt the other. When a person feels emotional pain, it seems he is also suffering. In physical pain, it seems my pain is less than yours, any way the inflictor looks at it. Do you want a person to feel physical pain inflicted, by you, when you can inflict it, and he does not want to? What does the situation say? Does it say, that because you can inflict the pain, the other person needs the pain? It seems you want to 'help' the person. Perhaps the help is real, but when one helps, one wants appreciation.