I wouldn't say I'm afraid of death, but I am afraid of the many things that come with death: devastation from loved ones, losing a future, the meanings I apply to my life will abruptly disappear, etc.
I already know that (assuming there is no afterlife) I wont even notice those things and they wouldn't be a problem. But I don't think unawareness of these problems are enough to cut it.
Already I have accepted that it is my fate, it will happen, and stressing over it does not help. I remind myself that thinking of these things makes me live it more often than I have to. But I've tried and tried and these thoughts can't escape my head. At least once a day will my mind trail off on this topic, imagining the scenario. I occasionally will be talking to someone when suddenly I imagine it in my head that they will someday be in the dirt.
It's not so much scary as it is ...odd for the lack of a better word.
Just clicks in. The most common imagination in this train of thought is imagining myself dying and my loved ones crying, or the other way around. At some point in time it will happen, one or the other, when both are terribly depressing.
When I die, my corpse no longer serves a purpose as a body, but instead serves a purpose of food for insects. It is returning to nature, escaping the illusion of being separate from it. Everything in reality is recycled. I'm inclined to believe this universe is actually a conscious being itself, and becoming one with it again feels divine, but it's a little ironic because in my life I am trying to break the umbilical cord.
Moving on - For some reason my mind can't get over this thought. I understand it's inevitable, but I not only know that it will happen to me eventually that sometime I will experience dying and then stop being. But I also FEEL that in my thoughts, I can feel the tragedy.
Is there truly a way to get over these thoughts? Not only acknowledging your fate, but ACCEPTING it.
Bonus Question: How likely is it to be buried alive in modern day america? That's one of my greatest fears and I want to assure it never happens to me.
I already know that (assuming there is no afterlife) I wont even notice those things and they wouldn't be a problem. But I don't think unawareness of these problems are enough to cut it.
Already I have accepted that it is my fate, it will happen, and stressing over it does not help. I remind myself that thinking of these things makes me live it more often than I have to. But I've tried and tried and these thoughts can't escape my head. At least once a day will my mind trail off on this topic, imagining the scenario. I occasionally will be talking to someone when suddenly I imagine it in my head that they will someday be in the dirt.
It's not so much scary as it is ...odd for the lack of a better word.
Just clicks in. The most common imagination in this train of thought is imagining myself dying and my loved ones crying, or the other way around. At some point in time it will happen, one or the other, when both are terribly depressing.
When I die, my corpse no longer serves a purpose as a body, but instead serves a purpose of food for insects. It is returning to nature, escaping the illusion of being separate from it. Everything in reality is recycled. I'm inclined to believe this universe is actually a conscious being itself, and becoming one with it again feels divine, but it's a little ironic because in my life I am trying to break the umbilical cord.
Moving on - For some reason my mind can't get over this thought. I understand it's inevitable, but I not only know that it will happen to me eventually that sometime I will experience dying and then stop being. But I also FEEL that in my thoughts, I can feel the tragedy.
Is there truly a way to get over these thoughts? Not only acknowledging your fate, but ACCEPTING it.
Bonus Question: How likely is it to be buried alive in modern day america? That's one of my greatest fears and I want to assure it never happens to me.