Karolina
Member
For those of you who feel it is important to worship God with like-minded people, a) why? and b) how much compromising are you willing to do to have that?
I've been a life-long seeker, settling several times in the faith of my upbringing - Catholicism. Most recently I tried very hard to believe everything so I could finally just fit in somewhere and feel I belong. It was going better and better, and in fact I started being asked to share my faith testimony. And then out of nowhere, the seeker bug caught up with me again, after I'd been settled in Catholicism for three years (most recently).
I've been to many different worship services with various religious faiths and denominations. I've read about probably 90% of the options available. My problem? Nothing is 100% a fit. Currently, I'm exploring Judaism (Reform in particular). I'm on board with all the beliefs that have been presented to me (I'm also taking a course at a local synagogue). The practices are a little hit and miss, but that's why I'm specifically looking into Reform Judaism, which from my understanding is OK with individual believers picking which of the various mitzvots (commandments) will be relevant and life-affirming for her or him. There are a few areas of slight discomfort, but I'm not trying to throw out the proverbial baby with the bathwater.
However, Jews don't necessarily want me to convert. That's one of the things I like about their philosophy, that they are not exclusive holders of the truth of God. At least as far personal practice and belief are concerned. But that also means that I've been hearing a lot of suggestions to "just go to a Unitarian/Universalist church" rather than discerning conversion to Judaism.
But I've been to UU churches and find them emotionally unfulfilling. I also find it problematic to worship alongside people who are not strict monotheists. I had the same problem at Quaker meetings where I really enjoyed the philosophy and social justice, but I wasn't ever learning anything from services, bc anyone could speak on any version of who God was to them, and it was a major hodgepodge. I also prefer ancient tradition and enjoy ritual (I was brought up Catholic, after all
)
Ideally, I'd like to continue to "follow Jesus" as far as turning to his teachings in the Christian Scriptures, without the trinitarianism or divinity aspects of Jesus that are common in most Christian churches.
Some have joked that I should start my own church, but I don't think that's a solution. The point is that no two individuals are alike in their belief system AND value system, so it's intellectually dishonest to expect everyone to conform in order to be included. That's again why I find Judaism so compelling. One of their values is to dialogue and debate and interpret, and there are no creeds.
So I guess I'm trying to decide between a few different options and wondering what you all have tried in an effort to find a spiritual home.
1. Stay Catholic and just make my peace with having a different personal belief system from what my church teaches. My husband recommends this option.
2. Maintain dual affiliation, in a sense, by keeping Catholic ties and also worshiping at Jewish synagogues. I see this as the current situation, but not a long-term solution.
3. Convert to Judaism. My husband is open to the idea of converting as a family, should we feel God leading us down that path. It is a huge decision, though, and perhaps it's a bit premature to be entertaining that idea already. Plus, I would have to find one of those rare (even among Reform Jews) rabbis who would allow my son and husband to convert without the bris (I guess you could call me an intactivist of sorts - I oppose circumcision on unconsenting boys, so I wouldn't circumcise/convert my son, and my husband is not interested in circumcision for himself either).
4. Worship with Jews but as a Noahide, or "righteous Gentile". In other words, without an official conversion. That's also something that may be inevitable if we pursue this path, though I'm not sure how fulfilling it would be long-term.
5. Keep my religion personal and do not seek to worship communally with others. This is an option I find least appealing, hence my dilemma.
I also want to note that I recognize this is a "first world" problem in that I even have so many options available to me thanks to religious freedom and plurality in the US where I live. In a way, it would be easier to know what to do if there weren't so many options!
So, what are you looking for in a faith community? What are you willing to compromise on? What are your non-negotiables?
I've been a life-long seeker, settling several times in the faith of my upbringing - Catholicism. Most recently I tried very hard to believe everything so I could finally just fit in somewhere and feel I belong. It was going better and better, and in fact I started being asked to share my faith testimony. And then out of nowhere, the seeker bug caught up with me again, after I'd been settled in Catholicism for three years (most recently).
I've been to many different worship services with various religious faiths and denominations. I've read about probably 90% of the options available. My problem? Nothing is 100% a fit. Currently, I'm exploring Judaism (Reform in particular). I'm on board with all the beliefs that have been presented to me (I'm also taking a course at a local synagogue). The practices are a little hit and miss, but that's why I'm specifically looking into Reform Judaism, which from my understanding is OK with individual believers picking which of the various mitzvots (commandments) will be relevant and life-affirming for her or him. There are a few areas of slight discomfort, but I'm not trying to throw out the proverbial baby with the bathwater.
However, Jews don't necessarily want me to convert. That's one of the things I like about their philosophy, that they are not exclusive holders of the truth of God. At least as far personal practice and belief are concerned. But that also means that I've been hearing a lot of suggestions to "just go to a Unitarian/Universalist church" rather than discerning conversion to Judaism.
But I've been to UU churches and find them emotionally unfulfilling. I also find it problematic to worship alongside people who are not strict monotheists. I had the same problem at Quaker meetings where I really enjoyed the philosophy and social justice, but I wasn't ever learning anything from services, bc anyone could speak on any version of who God was to them, and it was a major hodgepodge. I also prefer ancient tradition and enjoy ritual (I was brought up Catholic, after all
)Ideally, I'd like to continue to "follow Jesus" as far as turning to his teachings in the Christian Scriptures, without the trinitarianism or divinity aspects of Jesus that are common in most Christian churches.
Some have joked that I should start my own church, but I don't think that's a solution. The point is that no two individuals are alike in their belief system AND value system, so it's intellectually dishonest to expect everyone to conform in order to be included. That's again why I find Judaism so compelling. One of their values is to dialogue and debate and interpret, and there are no creeds.
So I guess I'm trying to decide between a few different options and wondering what you all have tried in an effort to find a spiritual home.
1. Stay Catholic and just make my peace with having a different personal belief system from what my church teaches. My husband recommends this option.
2. Maintain dual affiliation, in a sense, by keeping Catholic ties and also worshiping at Jewish synagogues. I see this as the current situation, but not a long-term solution.
3. Convert to Judaism. My husband is open to the idea of converting as a family, should we feel God leading us down that path. It is a huge decision, though, and perhaps it's a bit premature to be entertaining that idea already. Plus, I would have to find one of those rare (even among Reform Jews) rabbis who would allow my son and husband to convert without the bris (I guess you could call me an intactivist of sorts - I oppose circumcision on unconsenting boys, so I wouldn't circumcise/convert my son, and my husband is not interested in circumcision for himself either).
4. Worship with Jews but as a Noahide, or "righteous Gentile". In other words, without an official conversion. That's also something that may be inevitable if we pursue this path, though I'm not sure how fulfilling it would be long-term.
5. Keep my religion personal and do not seek to worship communally with others. This is an option I find least appealing, hence my dilemma.
I also want to note that I recognize this is a "first world" problem in that I even have so many options available to me thanks to religious freedom and plurality in the US where I live. In a way, it would be easier to know what to do if there weren't so many options!
So, what are you looking for in a faith community? What are you willing to compromise on? What are your non-negotiables?
