Trailblazer
Veteran Member
Whatever works for you. We cannot all look at life the same way, nor were we ever intended to.
I would feel like a prisoner if I did not think I had free will to make changes to my life. That does not mean I can always change just because I think I can, but in my mind I know I can and that it is only ME who is preventing me from changing. That's okay because I do not think change should happen unless we are ready for it, and I know intuitively what I need to do and when. I also know when I should not do something even though I feel I should do it. I believe this guidance comes from God.
Right now I know that I can only do what I can do, which is just one thing at a time. When I am ready to do the next thing, I will know and I will do it. If I try to do more than I can, it just causes stress and it never turns out as I hoped it would. For everything there is a season.
That is totally untrue, as evidenced by many people who have broken free from their childhoods. We are not victims of anyone unless we allow ourselves to be victims by "believing" we are victims. We can free ourselves from our childhood if we make the necessary effort. Of course that requires exercising our own will. It certainly is not easy and for some it takes a very long time. Not all people are up to facing their childhood issues, it is easier to adjust, self-medicate or medicate to get through the day.
I was in recovery for over 15 years and I did not start until age 32. During these years, I was fortunate to have a stable job, a stable marriage, good counselors, and 12 step programs and homeopathy to help me, but I had to be "willing" to do the work. I had to want to recover more than anything else in the world. During those years, I had nothing to do with the Baha'i Faith or God, as I did not consider myself worthy of either until I recovered from my personal issues. Occasionally, I still have residual thoughts and feelings that are a result of my childhood, but I know why I have them and it does not cause me or anyone else any harm.
I chose to face my childhood issues head on and deal with them. I will never have to deal with them again because I am free of them. Life will still have its struggles but ALL of them are because of the material world and all I have to negotiate because of it. Not one struggle that I have now is owing to my relationship with myself or with other people. The material world is what causes all pain and sorrow, but thankfully this world and this life is only temporary so after I die and go to the spiritual world I will be free of it. Meanwhile, I just try to make the best of it, one day at a time. I get some enjoyment from animals and nature, but I am always happiest when I am helping other people and thinking of them and not myself. I have no interest in material things or physical pleasures. Thank God I am a Bahai so I know this material world is a mere nothing, an illusion that people imagine to be real.
