Guru Relationship

[Andal]

Namaskar Guys

I have a question about the guru/ student relationship. Let me start by saying I have not taken initiation and this isn't about a guru in the religious sense.

I did have someone in my life whom I considered a guru in the broad sense as he was the original person to teach me my career and served as a mentor for several years. I performed seva for him in thanks and I did see him as a teacher/ guru. Over the last few years there have been several breaches of the trust I had and then a complete break in professional ethics by this person very recently. It has become apparent that it's time to move on. Being that he isn't a guru in the sampradaya sense, is there anything I need to do spiritual to separate myself from this person? I wish him well and I know on the grounds of ethics I cannot work with them anymore. Is there anything else to do? What about karmic ties with this person?

Thanks for your guidance

Aum Hari Aum!

 

[George-ananda]

My thought is to think of this like any breakup in which you have made a logical decision to end. You don't need to do anything but move on and find a satisfying spiritual practice that works for you. Don't even think about karmic ties just think about advancing along your spiritual path without contact with this person. Just keep the positive learnings and move on.

 

[Vinayaka]

I asked my Guru about breaking off relationships once. He said, "If you have to cut a dog's tail off, would you (and the dog I'm guessing) rather do it an inch at a time, or all at once?" I got my answer.

 

[Andal]

Thank you both so much. This is a big relief for me and I think confirmed my own thoughts. Thank you and pranam

 

[ratikala]

namaskaram Andal ji

Namaskar Guys

I did have someone in my life whom I considered a guru in the broad sense as he was the original person to teach me my career and served as a mentor for several years. I performed seva for him in thanks and I did see him as a teacher/ guru. Over the last few years there have been several breaches of the trust I had and then a complete break in professional ethics by this person very recently.

May I start by saying that a guru even in the broadest of sences has a responcibility for the wellbeing of anyone who places their trust in them ,
If this person has broken that trust or behaved irresponcibly , then in truth they are not worthy of being given Guru status.

you may have put this person onto the pedestal of guru , maybe due to their kindness at one point in time , but if that kindness does not come from the correct motivation or it has not continued in the same vein , then in this instance this person is not a guru even in the looset sence He may just be a kind person when he is capable of giving kindness , ...any recent breaches of trust sadly illustrate that the correct motivation is not there , it may have been once but it is not there any more , this is just a sad truth about the ability of humans to remain constant .
but you do have a responcibility to your self , you do not have to stay , infact it sounds best for all for you to go .

It has become apparent that it's time to move on. Being that he isn't a guru in the sampradaya sense, is there anything I need to do spiritual to separate myself from this person? I wish him well and I know on the grounds of ethics I cannot work with them anymore. Is there anything else to do? What about karmic ties with this person?

officialy give your thanks for every thing good which came from the freindship , obviously you know the situation better so you can decide what is the apprioriate way to show your gratitude , .....but forgeting any greavences sincerely show your thanks for all which has been benificial and make no mention of any other matter , leave on good terms .....this way you are showing your grattitude for past kindness with grace , having given true gratitude whether by the giving of a gift with a few well chosen words , or whether you feel that thanks alone is more appropriate it dosent matter , ...what is most important from your side is to show gratitude and to forgive any human failings , ...your debt in any karmic sence is repaid , ...however what is important is to leave that person to reflect on the importance of being of benifit to others , and who knows prehaps even he may think how better to handle such situations in future , ...however this is his lesson , ....the debt will be repaid by your grace and forgiveness .

and if for everything you have learnt , you ever feel you can give to another in some way by mentoring them , ...this too will square any possible imbalances , ...but one has to do it out of love and appreciation and not for reasons of squaring karmic reactions , ...love heals all mistakes , regretable situations and sadness .

Thanks for your guidance

Aum Hari Aum!

jai jai , ..Aum Hari Aum[/QUOTE]

 

[Andal]

Namaskar Ratikalaji

Thank you so much for this post. You have given the gift of clarity for me and a much better sense of how to go forward. Thank you for taking the time to share this wisdom

Aum Hari Aum!

 

[ratikala]

namaskaram

my pleasure

 

[ShivaFan]

Maybe it is your turn, now. To mentor another. And even give back to the first one. Your turn, to figure it out.

 

[Aupmanyav]

Nice replies. Have nothing more to add. Part, but without any rancor.

 

[Poeticus]

Namaskar Guys

I have a question about the guru/ student relationship. Let me start by saying I have not taken initiation and this isn't about a guru in the religious sense.

I did have someone in my life whom I considered a guru in the broad sense as he was the original person to teach me my career and served as a mentor for several years. I performed seva for him in thanks and I did see him as a teacher/ guru. Over the last few years there have been several breaches of the trust I had and then a complete break in professional ethics by this person very recently. It has become apparent that it's time to move on. Being that he isn't a guru in the sampradaya sense, is there anything I need to do spiritual to separate myself from this person? I wish him well and I know on the grounds of ethics I cannot work with them anymore. Is there anything else to do? What about karmic ties with this person?

Thanks for your guidance

Aum Hari Aum!

I'll admit, the title of this thread was misleading. The "guru" implied spiritual teacher, something directly Hindu-related, and if not then at least Dharmic-related. But it seems this is related to your work/career, correct? I believe you were quick to label this once-mentor as a "guru". I would have just used "mentor". But many people often do this, I'm afraid. The shabda, "guru", has gone through productization and its mystical application has drastically lessened. Same thing with the terms "pandit"/"pundit", "yoga", and "karma". Sad days, indeed.

 

[Aupmanyav]

A point that we missed.