How do I raise my son with a healthy view of God.

[LuisDantas]

I would teach this hypothetical son of mine that he should accept reality, and that I believe God is part of that reality. What he believes about Atheism will be up to himself, however I don't believe that Atheism necessitates immorality if that is your concern.

Almost. I'm bothered by people who see Atheism as wrong.

I did not say you are disgusted by the people, rather you said you are disgusted "about such a belief", and I was thinking your disgust at such a belief should extend to Buddha's belief, not just ours, but then again perhaps it does?

What do you think disgusts me about your beliefs?

 

[Sand Dancer]

After carefully reflecting on this thread I came to the following conclusions;

What you and your husband have in common;

-Belief in a merciful God
-The desire to raise your child with virtues, kindness, patience, caring etc.
You could easily agree to raise your child on the common points.

What you disagree on;
You believe in a Zoroastrian God concept, your husband believes in a trinitarian God concept.
You could tell your son that you have the Zoroastrian understanding of God and his Father has the Christian concept.

This way he will already understand that there is more than one way to think about God. He will almost inevitably seek to understand the two when he is ready, but on the other hand if he never feels ready then I guess that would be his choice.

In this way I think your difficulties will be solved, because you have enough in common to raise him on, and as far as the differences go the ball will be in your son's court.

If your son asks you to explain the Zoroastrian concept (he almost certainly would ask either you or someone else at some stage), then you could explain it to him since it would be his choice to raise the question.

Alternatively if you work up the courage to discuss it, your husband might pleasantly surprise you by agreeing that he learn both concepts right from the start, I guess if you don't ask you can't win

I appreciate you putting such thought into it. I like this advice!

 

[biased]

Take him spiritual places. Mosque, temple, gurdwārā, synagogue...

Avoid the doctrine of Hell. Bad for kids.
Avoid sin.

THIS. The Protestant evangelical Hellfire of Fire and brimstone theology is morally repugnant and sick. I think the atonement theology is too but that's for another thread.

Also Sin is something that needs to be understood much later. I had a lot of personal trouble coming to grasp what sin is. I still am not sure if it is real or exists, at least the way the orthodox Christians use it. I use it in a more Jungian/Gnostic sense.

 

[Sand Dancer]

THIS. The Protestant evangelical Hellfire of Fire and brimstone theology is morally repugnant and sick. I think the atonement theology is too but that's for another thread.

Also Sin is something that needs to be understood much later. I had a lot of personal trouble coming to grasp what sin is. I still am not sure if it is real or exists, at least the way the orthodox Christians use it. I use it in a more Jungian/Gnostic sense.

I really wish I had some sort of book to equip him with this stuff. When I look up "Teach children about God," it's always Judeo-Christian.

 

[Jiggerj]

My husband is Christian, and I was until lately, and we are raising our son as a Christian. With my recent change of heart, I want my son to love God but not necessarily adhere to a specific religion, but I also want him to have a sense of spiritual community, as he tends to be a loner type. He's ten. My husband may or may not agree with this idea of mine, but somehow I must bring my doubts up to him. In the meantime, I just need advice on books or conversations to have with my son.

Without knowing exactly what you want to teach him, we really can't say too much. So, please allow me to take the brainwashing of a child to the extreme. We just don't know how a young mind will process the idea of a god. He/she may think in ways that are downright dangerous. Things like:

God will protect me, so it's okay to go for a ride with a stranger.
Mom told me not to eat a cookie, but I stole one anyway. God will send me to hell!
God loves everyone, but he drowned everyone in a flood. God scares me.
Grandpa died and went to heaven. When no one is looking, I'm going to heaven too.

Again, these are extremes, but do you really want to risk them? Why not wait until he develops a rational mind (age 18 or so) and let him decide on what he wants to believe, instead of you telling him what to believe?

 

[Sand Dancer]

Again, these are extremes, but do you really want to risk them? Why not wait until he develops a rational mind (age 18 or so) and let him decide on what he wants to believe, instead of you telling him what to believe?

How does one do that? There's no spiritual vacuum for him if we're going to live out our own faiths.

 

[danieldemol]

Without knowing exactly what you want to teach him, we really can't say too much. So, please allow me to take the brainwashing of a child to the extreme. We just don't know how a young mind will process the idea of a god. He/she may think in ways that are downright dangerous. Things like:

God will protect me, so it's okay to go for a ride with a stranger.

Lets call this for what it is, an atheist polemic.
This is as silly as a believer saying, "an atheist kid might think something downright dangerous , like, since there is no God it doesn't really matter if I disobey Mommy's order not to go in a car with strangers, talk about theophobia. How many documented cases are there of that?!

Mom told me not to eat a cookie, but I stole one anyway. God will send me to hell!

Aside from Thirza not coming across as that kind of theist, even that kind of theist usually teach their kids that God is merciful to those who feel repentant.

God loves everyone, but he drowned everyone in a flood. God scares me.

This is like an atheist kid watching people die in a flood or bush fire, and going "nature scares me". Aside from the point that fear is not harmful if used beneficially, it is not dangerous for a child to fear the consequences of disobedience since for children who are not fully aware of various dangers until a certain age, obedience is a useful survival strategy. It is why even some atheists tell their children the Santa tale.

Grandpa died and went to heaven. When no one is looking, I'm going to heaven too.

Although this could obviously be countered by suggesting that suicide reduces one's likelihood of getting to heaven (most religions discourage suicide anyway), most kids with loving parents like Thirza and hubby are simply too attached to playing with their toys and having a good time to contemplate suicide.

Perhaps we should do the rational thing and look at scientific studies into the common sources of infant suicide (presumably this includes the likes of playground bullying) instead of murdering straw men to make ourselves artificially look good.

 

[Sand Dancer]

Aside from Thirza not coming across as that kind of theist, even that kind of theist usually teach their kids that God is merciful to those who feel repentant.

Thank you!