How shall we correct this injustice?

[Estro Felino]

As said, the other half happens in remote area's like forests.
Or in bars, disco's etc.

If you think stacking a bunch of privacy invading camera's on the streets is going to stop rape by any significant margin or somehow make it easier to identify rapists, you are simply delusional.

No. I have never said it will stop people from raping.
I said it will help the police identify the rapists.

 

[Koldo]

This is actually an ETHICAL issue rather than political, since absolutely every political party has never addressed it. However, since no ethical forum exists, politics seems to be the best place for the thread.

Last summer, my son asked me an odd question. He said, "If you were lost out in the woods, would you be more scared if a bear approached you, or a man?? Without hesitation, I said, "A man." He couldn't wrap his head around that. I tried to explain to him that a bear wasn't going to bother me unless I bothered it, if I scared it in some way, or it was worried about cubs. But a man, out in the middle of nowhere, with no one else to witness, could do ANYTHING. Yeah, I'd be terrified.

I find that thought to be rather curious. You presume that a bear would only attack you if you bothered it, but not only that is not exactly true, you couldn't possibly be sure whether you are bothering it (you could, for instance, have gotten really close to a cub without noticing). Worse than that, if the bear, for one reason or another, wants to kill you, there is very little you can do to defend yourself. The bear is much stronger, much faster, and can even climb trees (up to a certain point). You are 100% subject to what the bear decides to do to you.

On the other hand, there is the man. Prima facie, we do not know his true intentions. But running away and fighting back, even if hard (and this highly varies), is far more feasible than the bear scenario. Not only that, while it is true that it is indeed a rare occurence for a bear to kill a human, it is also a rare occurrence for a random man to willfully kill another random man/woman out of nowhere (outside of a battlefield). Plus, it is reasonable to presume this man will likely help you get out of the woods.

In other words, when it comes down to the possibility of being killed, the bear scenario is much more frightening, because the man wouldn't be any more likely to attempt to kill you than the bear and you would have a chance of fighting back/running away in the man scenario.

The other aspect that must be taken into consideration is rape. A bear wouldn't rape you, but a man possibly could. To reach the conclusion, as you did, that you would rather be approached by the bear, you either misjudged the actual threat posited by the man or the bear, or you consider rape so bad that you would prefer taking the additional risk of being killed (bear scenario) than the risk of being raped (man scenario), even if the man could also possibly and likely help you find your way out of the woods.

It makes me wonder, presuming the latter is true rather than the former, why that is the case. Maybe being constantly on guard to protect yourself against rape has made you more afraid of rape than murder, since you are much more likely to be a victim of the former than the latter in your daily life?

 

[Vinayaka]

This is actually an ETHICAL issue rather than political, since absolutely every political party has never addressed it. However, since no ethical forum exists, politics seems to be the best place for the thread.

Last summer, my son asked me an odd question. He said, "If you were lost out in the woods, would you be more scared if a bear approached you, or a man?? Without hesitation, I said, "A man." He couldn't wrap his head around that. I tried to explain to him that a bear wasn't going to bother me unless I bothered it, if I scared it in some way, or it was worried about cubs. But a man, out in the middle of nowhere, with no one else to witness, could do ANYTHING. Yeah, I'd be terrified.

The topic is sexual violence against women. This is not to suggest that men aren't victims of sexual violence. When a man is raped, it is just as horrifying and scarring as for a woman. However, sexual violence against men is much, much more rare. So, with all sympathy towards male victims, I'm going to plunge ahead with the topic. I'm also going to stick to US statistics, mostly from the RAINN website (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) but as we all know, sexual violence against women is a problem worldwide.

One out of every four women in the US is a victim of sexual violence. However, only about a third (310 out of every 1,000) of these women report it to the police. This meshes with my personal experience. I'm the sort in real life that others sense will be understanding and keep confidences, so I hear all sorts of private things from people, and of the many women who have told me they were raped, NONE went to the police.

Unlike the manosphere fear that women commonly accuse innocent men of rape, the truth is that genuine victims usually say nothing at all. The reasons are many.

• Shock. It's just easier to deny that something so horrible has happened. Going to the police makes it real.
• Shame. Even today in 2024, women are commonly blamed for their own rapes, everything from "Were you drinking" to "How were you dressed."
• Fear of retaliation. Self explanatory.
• Privacy. Women have a modesty that is just not as common among men. Most of us don't even feel comfortable undressing in front of other women in locker rooms. Sexual violence is something deeply personal, and many women just don't want to talk about it.
• Lying: No one suspects a mugging victim of making it up. No one suspects a home burglary victim of making it up. No one suspects a victim of a financial scam of making it up. But no sooner do you say rape, then the first thing that goes through the minds of most men is, "Is she making it up?"
• Concern for the perpetrator: Amazingly, 7% of all sexual assault victims say the reason they didn't go to the police was because they didn't want to get the perp (likely a friend or family member) into trouble.
• Danger: There are literally victims of rape in this country who are currently in jail for "filing a false police report." They first get bullied by overly zealous detectives to withdrawing their complaint, and then are arrested and prosecuted.
• Being raped a second time: If it goes to court, the victim has to endure the vicious attacks of defense attorneys, who will do all they can to drag her through the mud.
• Lack of faith in the system: The truth is, almost no perpetrators of sexual violence ever go to jail. They rape without consequence. Most victims think, "What good does it do to go to the police?" It is this last element that I want to do a deep dive on.

Let's look at some of the statistics. As I already mentioned, not even a third of all sexual assaults are reported to the police. As reported by RAINN: Out of every 1000 sexual assaults, 975 perpetrators will walk free. Only 50 reports will lead to an arrest. Only 28 will lead to a felony conviction. Only 25 will be incarcerated. Out of 1000.

This means that only 2.5% of women who are sexually assaulted will see their victimizer go to jail. And in case you think this website is too generous towards women, please know that I have chosen one that is more conservative. I've seen statistics as low as 0.15%.

The long and short of it is this: men continue to rape women with impunity. I'm not saying that most men are rapists. They're not. (And those many men who do treat women with respect, you have my undying love!) But for those who do harm women, they do a LOT of damage, and they do it without consequence.


So.... Let's get down to the brass tacks. WHAT CAN BE DONE TO CHANGE THIS? How can our laws be changed? How can police policies be changed? How can our justice department be changed?

I put most of it on the incorrect 'entitlement' of the perpetrators, and the total lack of education on the matter. People think they can speed on the highways, not wear masks, and much more, because it's their right to do so. It's totally not about caring, empathy, etc, for others. The mass media supports this idea with celebrity rape, movies suggesting 'she wanted it' and a whole lot more. The macho-man culture is still with us, sadly, and it doesn't seem to want to go away on it's own.

For those folks who have an ounce of decency, good parenting, inner conscience, the act of rape is unthinkable. So a corollary question is how we can 'create' more men with those qualities.

The approach of education addresses the cause of it, and personally, I think that that is the only long term solution. Clearly, law enforcement doesn't seem to be reducing much. I also think it would be helpful to train the decent men to stand up to other males and speak out more to the snide sexual comments heard amongst men. It will be a long battle, but worth it.

 

[Koldo]

No. I have never said it will stop people from raping.
I said it will help the police identify the rapists.

Identifying the alleged rapist is generally not the problem. Proving he, de facto, raped is.

 

[Estro Felino]

Identifying the alleged rapist is generally not the problem. Proving he, de facto, raped is.

If the hidden cameras filmed the criminal act...well..it proves it.

 

[TagliatelliMonster]

No. I have never said it will stop people from raping.
I said it will help the police identify the rapists.

If you think stacking a bunch of privacy invading camera's on the streets is going to stop rape by any significant margin or somehow make it easier to identify rapists, you are simply delusional.

You should pay more attention when you read posts you plan on replying to.

 

[Koldo]

We need to live in a Big Brother's studio.
With thousands of surveillance cameras. That assure us safety against criminals.

Later on this topic, you focused on unknown rapists kidnapping people, making your main point get lost... but this really is THE solution in the short-term.

No thanks


Not really. It does rape our privacy though.

Well... If there was a camera in every room a woman enters, this would prevent a huge number of rapes. It would also indeed mean losing a lot of privacy.

 

[wellwisher]

This is actually an ETHICAL issue rather than political, since absolutely every political party has never addressed it. However, since no ethical forum exists, politics seems to be the best place for the thread.

Last summer, my son asked me an odd question. He said, "If you were lost out in the woods, would you be more scared if a bear approached you, or a man?? Without hesitation, I said, "A man." He couldn't wrap his head around that. I tried to explain to him that a bear wasn't going to bother me unless I bothered it, if I scared it in some way, or it was worried about cubs. But a man, out in the middle of nowhere, with no one else to witness, could do ANYTHING. Yeah, I'd be terrified.

The topic is sexual violence against women. This is not to suggest that men aren't victims of sexual violence. When a man is raped, it is just as horrifying and scarring as for a woman. However, sexual violence against men is much, much more rare. So, with all sympathy towards male victims, I'm going to plunge ahead with the topic. I'm also going to stick to US statistics, mostly from the RAINN website (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) but as we all know, sexual violence against women is a problem worldwide.

One out of every four women in the US is a victim of sexual violence. However, only about a third (310 out of every 1,000) of these women report it to the police. This meshes with my personal experience. I'm the sort in real life that others sense will be understanding and keep confidences, so I hear all sorts of private things from people, and of the many women who have told me they were raped, NONE went to the police.

Unlike the manosphere fear that women commonly accuse innocent men of rape, the truth is that genuine victims usually say nothing at all. The reasons are many.

• Shock. It's just easier to deny that something so horrible has happened. Going to the police makes it real.
• Shame. Even today in 2024, women are commonly blamed for their own rapes, everything from "Were you drinking" to "How were you dressed."
• Fear of retaliation. Self explanatory.
• Privacy. Women have a modesty that is just not as common among men. Most of us don't even feel comfortable undressing in front of other women in locker rooms. Sexual violence is something deeply personal, and many women just don't want to talk about it.
• Lying: No one suspects a mugging victim of making it up. No one suspects a home burglary victim of making it up. No one suspects a victim of a financial scam of making it up. But no sooner do you say rape, then the first thing that goes through the minds of most men is, "Is she making it up?"
• Concern for the perpetrator: Amazingly, 7% of all sexual assault victims say the reason they didn't go to the police was because they didn't want to get the perp (likely a friend or family member) into trouble.
• Danger: There are literally victims of rape in this country who are currently in jail for "filing a false police report." They first get bullied by overly zealous detectives to withdrawing their complaint, and then are arrested and prosecuted.
• Being raped a second time: If it goes to court, the victim has to endure the vicious attacks of defense attorneys, who will do all they can to drag her through the mud.
• Lack of faith in the system: The truth is, almost no perpetrators of sexual violence ever go to jail. They rape without consequence. Most victims think, "What good does it do to go to the police?" It is this last element that I want to do a deep dive on.

Let's look at some of the statistics. As I already mentioned, not even a third of all sexual assaults are reported to the police. As reported by RAINN: Out of every 1000 sexual assaults, 975 perpetrators will walk free. Only 50 reports will lead to an arrest. Only 28 will lead to a felony conviction. Only 25 will be incarcerated. Out of 1000.

This means that only 2.5% of women who are sexually assaulted will see their victimizer go to jail. And in case you think this website is too generous towards women, please know that I have chosen one that is more conservative. I've seen statistics as low as 0.15%.

The long and short of it is this: men continue to rape women with impunity. I'm not saying that most men are rapists. They're not. (And those many men who do treat women with respect, you have my undying love!) But for those who do harm women, they do a LOT of damage, and they do it without consequence.


So.... Let's get down to the brass tacks. WHAT CAN BE DONE TO CHANGE THIS? How can our laws be changed? How can police policies be changed? How can our justice department be changed?

A few wilds card, to this topic, that have an impact, are socially acceptable promiscuity, for both men and women, and how public education deals with sex education for children. Birth control pills now come in the shape of Fred Flintstone and Gummy Bears, so little kids can practice early. On one hand, one is taugt sex should be free and unashamed biology, which can lead to misunderstanding. All the girls and boys take the sex class and if a girl gets an A, is she ready to go? The boys are ready. You can see how the teachers conditioned the kids to get on board with sex change, and how to even hide that from their parents. What about sex education?

Decades ago, when more females were more modest about sex; steady boyfriend, the system self policed, since older brothers and friends would get even, trusting her word by her trauma. Now, you need a score card, with the nice girls caught up in the confusion. Even feminism made it OK for females to act more like men when it comes to the opposite sex; rent male hookers. Some assume these liberated women were being up front like guys and not running games. Socialized promiscuity leads to errors in sound judgement.

There is a difference between raping a prostitute versus a raping a virgin or married woman. The prostitute is hardened and does this for a living, so it is like stealing. Had John, paid in advance, the exact same thing is not called rape; but soliciting prostitution. The virgin can have a much more traumatic time, as could a married woman, since this violates their will and choice. The ambiguity makes it harder for real victims. The justice system senses the ambiguity and many predators are able to get off, and many girls can't press charges, due to not wanting to admit legally relevant but unrelated things. If cultural values taught purity, then these dynamics have a more tangible line in the sand.

The Left is now wanting to allow biological men in women's locker rooms and bathrooms. This is a predator lure. It is almost like the DNC wants rape to happen, by the how and what they teach.

One bizarre notion, that also adds confusion, created by the left, is what is called marital rape. That concept adds up to legal prostitution. Marriage is about sharing, with the two, becoming one heart and body. If sex between married parters can be labeled rape, and the male learns he has to overcome that stigma, by paying in advance; flowers, men now get to marry martial hookers. It is not rape if you pay in advance.

This confuses the line between rape, and adds the hooker paradox; paying before you ride is acceptable. It is almost a lawyer invention, since it can give an open door to lawyers, sharing the couples assets, by precipitating divorce.; Ching Ching $$$$. If guys wanted a hocker he would not be married; cheaper and more variety in the free market. The hooker does not get your whole paycheck; marital assets. The destruction of the nuclear family has been the goal of the radical Left since the 1960's.

 

[Estro Felino]

Well... If there was a camera in every room a woman enters, this would prevent a huge number of rapes. It would also indeed mean losing a lot of privacy.

I am not ashamed...honestly.
I want to do things aboveboard. I have nothing to hide.

 

[Estro Felino]

If you think stacking a bunch of privacy invading camera's on the streets is going to stop rape by any significant margin or somehow make it easier to identify rapists, you are simply delusional.

You should pay more attention when you read posts you plan on replying to.

Cameras also help to stop liars and deceivers...dear sir.

 

[TagliatelliMonster]

I put most of it on the incorrect 'entitlement' of the perpetrators, and the total lack of education on the matter. People think they can speed on the highways, not wear masks, and much more, because it's their right to do so. It's totally not about caring, empathy, etc, for others. The mass media supports this idea with celebrity rape, movies suggesting 'she wanted it' and a whole lot more. The macho-man culture is still with us, sadly, and it doesn't seem to want to go away on it's own.

For those folks who have an ounce of decency, good parenting, inner conscience, the act of rape is unthinkable. So a corollary question is how we can 'create' more men with those qualities.

The approach of education addresses the cause of it, and personally, I think that that is the only long term solution. Clearly, law enforcement doesn't seem to be reducing much. I also think it would be helpful to train the decent men to stand up to other males and speak out more to the snide sexual comments heard amongst men. It will be a long battle, but worth it.

I feel like there is a giant step missing between "macho-man" and "snide sexual comments" on the one hand, and actually engaging in sexual violence / rape on the other.

I don't consider myself a "macho" at all, but as the vast majority of males will attest to, if being honest, then the "snide sexual comments" are pretty much the normal order of the day when among men.

For the healthy fertile man between, say, 16 and 50 years old, perhaps older also, sex is pretty much always on our minds one way or the other.
When a gorgeous sexy woman walks by, believe you me: all of us have seen her. Most of us are undressing her in our minds also.

The other day we were standing outside of the office having a smoke and a home nurse stopped to go work in one of the apartments upstairs. There's a few older people living there who get daily help. She was a beautiful woman. Almost instantly, the comments started "ow yeah, she can come give me a spungebath any time..." followed by laughing nods of agreement.

A woman might walk by in a tight top and we'll all be like "nice, real perky"
Another woman might walk by with a round behind and we'll all be like "shake it honey" or "man, must make a nice full clapping sound to slap that thing".


This is how we talk among ourselves.
From there, it feels like a GIANT leap to talk like that to women or even only in the proximity of women.

And from there, it's an even more GIANT leap to not only talk that thrash, but actually LIVE IT and thus engage in sexual violence of any sort.

Not a hair on my body would even consider it.

Such silly talk among men is one thing. To actually go and harass women, verbally or physically, is a completely different beast!


Also, I'm quite certain that women among themselves will also engage in the exact same type of sexually tinted comments about the men they see walking around.

 

[TagliatelliMonster]

I want to do things aboveboard. I have nothing to hide.

You have a great many things to hide.

People who say "I have nothing to hide" when defending things that would rape freedom of privacy, are people who never actually properly thought things through.

 

[TagliatelliMonster]

Cameras also help to stop liars and deceivers...dear sir.

A few anecdotal cases one way or the other, will not change my mind.

 

[TagliatelliMonster]

If the hidden cameras filmed the criminal act...well..it proves it.

HIDDEN camera's are even worse. Not to mention illegal

 

[Estro Felino]

HIDDEN camera's are even worse. Not to mention illegal

In your country, maybe.
Not in mine.

 

[Estro Felino]

A few anecdotal cases one way or the other, will not change my mind.

Few cases that show that there are also false allegations.

 

[Revoltingest]

..."If you were lost out in the woods, would you be more scared if a bear approached you, or a man?? Without hesitation, I said, "A man."

Androphobia (Fear of Men): What Is It, Symptoms & Treatment

People with androphobia have an extreme fear of men, possibly from a traumatic childhood experience or abuse. Psychotherapy can help you overcome this fear.

my.clevelandclinic.org

That doesn't strike me as an ethical issue.
Just as being misogyny & racism aren't ethical issues
because people can
Only wrongful behavior stemming from them is.

The topic is sexual violence against women.

When introduced as an irrational fear of
men, additional issues were broached.
I'll skip the rest.
Suffice to say that if one wants to pursue
a very specific topic, avoid introducing
additional controversial ones.

 

[Samael_Khan]

This is actually an ETHICAL issue rather than political, since absolutely every political party has never addressed it. However, since no ethical forum exists, politics seems to be the best place for the thread.

Last summer, my son asked me an odd question. He said, "If you were lost out in the woods, would you be more scared if a bear approached you, or a man?? Without hesitation, I said, "A man." He couldn't wrap his head around that. I tried to explain to him that a bear wasn't going to bother me unless I bothered it, if I scared it in some way, or it was worried about cubs. But a man, out in the middle of nowhere, with no one else to witness, could do ANYTHING. Yeah, I'd be terrified.

The topic is sexual violence against women. This is not to suggest that men aren't victims of sexual violence. When a man is raped, it is just as horrifying and scarring as for a woman. However, sexual violence against men is much, much more rare. So, with all sympathy towards male victims, I'm going to plunge ahead with the topic. I'm also going to stick to US statistics, mostly from the RAINN website (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) but as we all know, sexual violence against women is a problem worldwide.

One out of every four women in the US is a victim of sexual violence. However, only about a third (310 out of every 1,000) of these women report it to the police. This meshes with my personal experience. I'm the sort in real life that others sense will be understanding and keep confidences, so I hear all sorts of private things from people, and of the many women who have told me they were raped, NONE went to the police.

Unlike the manosphere fear that women commonly accuse innocent men of rape, the truth is that genuine victims usually say nothing at all. The reasons are many.

• Shock. It's just easier to deny that something so horrible has happened. Going to the police makes it real.
• Shame. Even today in 2024, women are commonly blamed for their own rapes, everything from "Were you drinking" to "How were you dressed."
• Fear of retaliation. Self explanatory.
• Privacy. Women have a modesty that is just not as common among men. Most of us don't even feel comfortable undressing in front of other women in locker rooms. Sexual violence is something deeply personal, and many women just don't want to talk about it.
• Lying: No one suspects a mugging victim of making it up. No one suspects a home burglary victim of making it up. No one suspects a victim of a financial scam of making it up. But no sooner do you say rape, then the first thing that goes through the minds of most men is, "Is she making it up?"
• Concern for the perpetrator: Amazingly, 7% of all sexual assault victims say the reason they didn't go to the police was because they didn't want to get the perp (likely a friend or family member) into trouble.
• Danger: There are literally victims of rape in this country who are currently in jail for "filing a false police report." They first get bullied by overly zealous detectives to withdrawing their complaint, and then are arrested and prosecuted.
• Being raped a second time: If it goes to court, the victim has to endure the vicious attacks of defense attorneys, who will do all they can to drag her through the mud.
• Lack of faith in the system: The truth is, almost no perpetrators of sexual violence ever go to jail. They rape without consequence. Most victims think, "What good does it do to go to the police?" It is this last element that I want to do a deep dive on.

Let's look at some of the statistics. As I already mentioned, not even a third of all sexual assaults are reported to the police. As reported by RAINN: Out of every 1000 sexual assaults, 975 perpetrators will walk free. Only 50 reports will lead to an arrest. Only 28 will lead to a felony conviction. Only 25 will be incarcerated. Out of 1000.

This means that only 2.5% of women who are sexually assaulted will see their victimizer go to jail. And in case you think this website is too generous towards women, please know that I have chosen one that is more conservative. I've seen statistics as low as 0.15%.

The long and short of it is this: men continue to rape women with impunity. I'm not saying that most men are rapists. They're not. (And those many men who do treat women with respect, you have my undying love!) But for those who do harm women, they do a LOT of damage, and they do it without consequence.


So.... Let's get down to the brass tacks. WHAT CAN BE DONE TO CHANGE THIS? How can our laws be changed? How can police policies be changed? How can our justice department be changed?

My country has a huge problem with sexual violence, especially against women and children. I think it is still called the rape capital of the world. My family has been affected by this as well. So I have often had discussions about this with others. My opinion is:

How can our laws be changed? Changing laws mostly isnt a solution to the problem. The one law I would make though is that men who sexually assualt others should be castrated and left to bleed. If they die then good riddance. This is because I believe that if you violate someone elses rights in such extreme cases, your rights have been forfeited.

How do we actually solve the problem?

Lots of education and honest debate. Also research on what the root causes are really and mitigating them.

Somehow, we must counter the idea of hatred of women just for being women. Us men have such fragile egos that, here in Africa, women tend to fear rejecting men who approach them for fear of consequences. We live in a very messed up society when a man will hit a woman in public just for being rejected. Men here also feel entitled to getting women for some reason, as if they have ownership over them.

We must also get rid of very toxic ideas that us men get taught, such as the idea that when a woman says no, then she actually means the opposite or that it just means that you should try harder.

And I think one of the biggest changes that can be made, is that when other men speak derogatory about women or harrass women in any way, we as men should call them out in a way that will make them think and change. Especially if they are in our circle of friends.

 

[Foxfyre]

This is actually an ETHICAL issue rather than political, since absolutely every political party has never addressed it. However, since no ethical forum exists, politics seems to be the best place for the thread.

Last summer, my son asked me an odd question. He said, "If you were lost out in the woods, would you be more scared if a bear approached you, or a man?? Without hesitation, I said, "A man." He couldn't wrap his head around that. I tried to explain to him that a bear wasn't going to bother me unless I bothered it, if I scared it in some way, or it was worried about cubs. But a man, out in the middle of nowhere, with no one else to witness, could do ANYTHING. Yeah, I'd be terrified.

The topic is sexual violence against women. This is not to suggest that men aren't victims of sexual violence. When a man is raped, it is just as horrifying and scarring as for a woman. However, sexual violence against men is much, much more rare. So, with all sympathy towards male victims, I'm going to plunge ahead with the topic. I'm also going to stick to US statistics, mostly from the RAINN website (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) but as we all know, sexual violence against women is a problem worldwide.

One out of every four women in the US is a victim of sexual violence. However, only about a third (310 out of every 1,000) of these women report it to the police. This meshes with my personal experience. I'm the sort in real life that others sense will be understanding and keep confidences, so I hear all sorts of private things from people, and of the many women who have told me they were raped, NONE went to the police.

Unlike the manosphere fear that women commonly accuse innocent men of rape, the truth is that genuine victims usually say nothing at all. The reasons are many.

• Shock. It's just easier to deny that something so horrible has happened. Going to the police makes it real.
• Shame. Even today in 2024, women are commonly blamed for their own rapes, everything from "Were you drinking" to "How were you dressed."
• Fear of retaliation. Self explanatory.
• Privacy. Women have a modesty that is just not as common among men. Most of us don't even feel comfortable undressing in front of other women in locker rooms. Sexual violence is something deeply personal, and many women just don't want to talk about it.
• Lying: No one suspects a mugging victim of making it up. No one suspects a home burglary victim of making it up. No one suspects a victim of a financial scam of making it up. But no sooner do you say rape, then the first thing that goes through the minds of most men is, "Is she making it up?"
• Concern for the perpetrator: Amazingly, 7% of all sexual assault victims say the reason they didn't go to the police was because they didn't want to get the perp (likely a friend or family member) into trouble.
• Danger: There are literally victims of rape in this country who are currently in jail for "filing a false police report." They first get bullied by overly zealous detectives to withdrawing their complaint, and then are arrested and prosecuted.
• Being raped a second time: If it goes to court, the victim has to endure the vicious attacks of defense attorneys, who will do all they can to drag her through the mud.
• Lack of faith in the system: The truth is, almost no perpetrators of sexual violence ever go to jail. They rape without consequence. Most victims think, "What good does it do to go to the police?" It is this last element that I want to do a deep dive on.

Let's look at some of the statistics. As I already mentioned, not even a third of all sexual assaults are reported to the police. As reported by RAINN: Out of every 1000 sexual assaults, 975 perpetrators will walk free. Only 50 reports will lead to an arrest. Only 28 will lead to a felony conviction. Only 25 will be incarcerated. Out of 1000.

This means that only 2.5% of women who are sexually assaulted will see their victimizer go to jail. And in case you think this website is too generous towards women, please know that I have chosen one that is more conservative. I've seen statistics as low as 0.15%.

The long and short of it is this: men continue to rape women with impunity. I'm not saying that most men are rapists. They're not. (And those many men who do treat women with respect, you have my undying love!) But for those who do harm women, they do a LOT of damage, and they do it without consequence.


So.... Let's get down to the brass tacks. WHAT CAN BE DONE TO CHANGE THIS? How can our laws be changed? How can police policies be changed? How can our justice department be changed?

I would be more afraid of the bear myself. I have lived a very long time now and I know many many people, many many other women. And I don't need all the fingers on one hand to count those who have ever mentioned they were victims of or even fearful of sexual assault. So I do question a statistic that suggests one out of four of us have been sexually assaulted.

I certainly don't minimize that women are more susceptible to sexual assault, rape, sexual harassment etc. than men. But in my opinion what we do about it is:

1. Do not allow home grown sexual predators to have easy access to women and children.
2. Control our borders and deny admission to those who have not come through the legal immigration system. To invite in sexual predators, sex traffickers among millions of migrants is just plain nuts.
3. Keep private spaces--public restrooms, locker rooms, dressing rooms--restricted to biological women. Don't put women in the position of having a biological male assigned as a roommate etc.
4. And most importantly, teach young women to exercise common sense, respect themselves, their bodies, the importance of decency and modesty and good manners. And teach young men to not strike or otherwise use their superior strength to mistreat women but rather protect them, to be modest themselves, decent, courteous, and respectful.

 

[Samael_Khan]

I would be more afraid of the bear myself. I have lived a very long time now and I know many many people, many many other women. And I don't need all the fingers on one hand to count those who have ever mentioned they were victims of or even fearful of sexual assault. So I do question a statistic that suggests one out of four of us have been sexually assaulted.

I certainly don't minimize that women are more susceptible to sexual assault, rape, sexual harassment etc. than men. But in my opinion what we do about it is:

1. Do not allow home grown sexual predators to have easy access to women and children.
2. Control our borders and deny admission to those who have not come through the legal immigration system. To invite in sexual predators, sex traffickers among millions of migrants is just plain nuts.
3. Keep private spaces--public restrooms, locker rooms, dressing rooms--restricted to biological women. Don't put women in the position of having a biological male assigned as a roommate etc.
4. And most importantly, teach young women to exercise common sense, respect themselves, their bodies, the importance of decency and modesty and good manners. And teach young men to not strike or otherwise use their superior strength to mistreat women but rather protect them, to be modest themselves, decent, courteous, and respectful.

Possibly also have some sort of control over religions because of the gross amount of sexual assualt the priests and other worshippers commit.