How to Pick Up Men and Women

[oldbadger]

It better not be a hint. Men are tone-deaf regarding hints.

Yes!
That's why female courting gestures are very exaggerated, so that men might just pick up on them. Whereas women's sensitivity to body language and gestures is many more times acute.

 

[oldbadger]

Woot! I'm the exception. When we met, my future wife kept trying to get rid of me. And me, Mr. hint-deaf over here, kept persisting. Now we're at 29 years and going strong.

My wife picked me.
Bloody nearly had to shake me to get her message over.
But Goodness only knows why..... she could have picked any bloke.

 

[Revoltingest]

All you had to do was park your traction engine down the road and lean against it.
The girls just luv a bit of speed!

Alas, I never had a steam traction engine.
I had to rely upon my good looks, scintillating personality, & snappy fashion choices.

 

[Rival]

Alas, I never had a steam traction engine.
I had to rely upon my good looks, scintillating personality, & snappy fashion choices.

You weren't wearing snacks were you?

 

[Revoltingest]

You weren't wearing snacks were you?

I didn't learn of that technique until a couple days ago!

 

[Enoch07]

This thread is titled "How to Pick Up Men and Women," not "How to Remain Single Forever."

Its about "How to pick up men and woman" not "how to get married and settle down". Someone who has admitted to needing many pages of notes just to talk to girls doesn't really have any room to judge.

 

[ExVasterist]

This thread is titled "How to Pick Up Men and Women," not "How to Remain Single Forever."

How is my post equal to "Just ignore them"? And I'm not single.
And if my post says to you "How to remain single forever" Does that mean you're generally a dick to all women and that somehow works?

 

[sandy whitelinger]

About 40 years ago, a number of scientists in various fields -- such as psychology, anthropology, and biology -- more or less simultaneously discovered that in humans successful courtships are most often initiated by the female.

By "successful courtships", I mean courtships that lead to sex. In contrast, the scientists found that male-initiated courtships are most of the time doomed to failure.

Since then, the early findings have been collaborated by dozens and dozens of additional studies. The science that suggests women more often initiate successful courtships than men do is by now pretty solid.

Now that science happens to contradict some age old prejudices in Western culture. Traditionally, the popular notion has been that men initiate most successful courtships and that women pretty much do little more than pick and choose which men to accept. In fact, if you ask most people even today which sex is most likely to initiate a successful courtship, you'd probably hear it was men. So why does so much science suggest otherwise?

Well, one reason might be that the scientists are looking at courtship a bit differently than the average person. The average person (in my opinion) probably thinks of courtship behavior as beginning when the first words are spoken. If so, they are likely to think that men typically initiate courtship because men are often -- perhaps even usually -- the first to actually speak in a courtship.

Yet, the studies I'm referring to are all studies of nonverbal courtship behavior. They don't measure the start of a courtship from the first person to say something, but rather from the first person to do something. And what they consistently find is that women -- and not men -- are usually the first people to do something that initiates a successful courtship.

Basically, women signal the men they're interested in via such means as making repeated eye contact, making repeated eye contact while preening their hair, turning their body to face a certain man, and so forth. All these signals are ways women encourage men to court them.

So, if you're a woman wanting to pick up men, signal the men you're interested in to approach you. And if you're a man looking to pick up women, the odds are in your favor when you respond to a woman's signals, rather than approach a woman cold.

All of this began to be revealed by the sciences about 40 years ago. Forty years from now, it might be common knowledge. But today, most people probably believe the old-fashioned notion that men are the sex that initiates most successful courtships.

Comments? Observations? Mouth frothing rants?


Further Reading:

Human Nonverbal Courtship Behavior: A Brief Historical Review

I just pick em up n me Ford truck. Hillbilly style.

 

[Rival]

How is my post equal to "Just ignore them"? And I'm not single.
And if my post says to you "How to remain single forever" Does that mean you're generally a dick to all women and that somehow works?

Lol.

 

[sandy whitelinger]

How is my post equal to "Just ignore them"? And I'm not single.
And if my post says to you "How to remain single forever" Does that mean you're generally a dick to all women and that somehow works?

I always liked the Tao of Steve approach.

 

[Debater Slayer]

Its about "How to pick up men and woman" not "how to get married and settle down". Someone who has admitted to needing many pages of notes just to talk to girls doesn't really have any room to judge.

Well, if I said, "Just make many pages of notes and women will like you" as a generalizing, blanket statement, I'd be very wrong. I don't believe it's reasonable to say there's a one-size-fits-all approach--not even the brilliant, simple one I used when I made a small book to talk to someone.

 

[Debater Slayer]

How is my post equal to "Just ignore them"? And I'm not single.
And if my post says to you "How to remain single forever" Does that mean you're generally a **** to all women and that somehow works?

I didn't say it was equal.

As for the rest, I'm not going to bother responding to that. I don't think it deserves a response, in all fairness.

 

[columbus]

Does that mean you're generally a dick to all women and that somehow works?

It works for an unfortunate number of people
Tom

 

[Enoch07]

Well, if I said, "Just make many pages of notes and women will like you" as a generalizing, blanket statement, I'd be very wrong. I don't believe it's reasonable to say there's a one-size-fits-all approach--not even the brilliant, simple one I used when I made a small book to talk to someone.

I agree, which is why I admitted my technique doesn't work on all women. So my bases was covered there as well.

Of course this comes down to recognizing the subtle signals above. If no signals is present ignoring has zero effect.

 

[Debater Slayer]

I agree, which is why I admitted my technique doesn't work on all women. So my bases was covered there as well.

What is that smiley? Are you trying to give a signal to pick me up here?

*goes to make a small book for Enoch*

 

[Enoch07]

What is that smiley? Are you trying to give a signal to pick me up here?

*goes to make a small book for Enoch*

You didn't know? Smile emojis are considered rape now! You might want to contact your local police and file a charge!

 

[Eliminator]

Time throughout never say not for strike those that trespass my land my space my time...... I mind.

 

[Kangaroo Feathers]

Don't people fix dates online nowadays? Randomly looking around in bars and dance clubs seems inefficient. There are singles mixers and activity groups too.

Yes, what was considered normal behaviour "back in the day" is now considered creepy. Bars and clubs used to be the place to meet new people. Watch a stranger approach someone they don't know in such places today, the reaction is what you'd expect being asked for wholesale baby body parts.

 

[Kangaroo Feathers]

About 40 years ago, a number of scientists in various fields -- such as psychology, anthropology, and biology -- more or less simultaneously discovered that in humans successful courtships are most often initiated by the female.

By "successful courtships", I mean courtships that lead to sex. In contrast, the scientists found that male-initiated courtships are most of the time doomed to failure.

Since then, the early findings have been collaborated by dozens and dozens of additional studies. The science that suggests women more often initiate successful courtships than men do is by now pretty solid.

Now that science happens to contradict some age old prejudices in Western culture. Traditionally, the popular notion has been that men initiate most successful courtships and that women pretty much do little more than pick and choose which men to accept. In fact, if you ask most people even today which sex is most likely to initiate a successful courtship, you'd probably hear it was men. So why does so much science suggest otherwise?

Well, one reason might be that the scientists are looking at courtship a bit differently than the average person. The average person (in my opinion) probably thinks of courtship behavior as beginning when the first words are spoken. If so, they are likely to think that men typically initiate courtship because men are often -- perhaps even usually -- the first to actually speak in a courtship.

Yet, the studies I'm referring to are all studies of nonverbal courtship behavior. They don't measure the start of a courtship from the first person to say something, but rather from the first person to do something. And what they consistently find is that women -- and not men -- are usually the first people to do something that initiates a successful courtship.

Basically, women signal the men they're interested in via such means as making repeated eye contact, making repeated eye contact while preening their hair, turning their body to face a certain man, and so forth. All these signals are ways women encourage men to court them.

So, if you're a woman wanting to pick up men, signal the men you're interested in to approach you. And if you're a man looking to pick up women, the odds are in your favor when you respond to a woman's signals, rather than approach a woman cold.

All of this began to be revealed by the sciences about 40 years ago. Forty years from now, it might be common knowledge. But today, most people probably believe the old-fashioned notion that men are the sex that initiates most successful courtships.

Comments? Observations? Mouth frothing rants?


Further Reading:

Human Nonverbal Courtship Behavior: A Brief Historical Review

Rule 1: Be attractive
Rule 2: Don't be unattractive