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I Love Julia Roberts

Brickjectivity

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
This is a true story about why I feel like I am Julia Robert's father. I know it sounds weird but when I was about seventeen I had to fly out to Los Angeles, and when I landed I swear I saw Julia in the airport waiting for a plane. (I call her 'My Julia'.) Now, as a superstar she probably hates being in the tabloids, but it was the tabloids which complicated my connection with her. You see I am not a famous actor as some of you seem to suspect but a typical American with no ties to the film industry, and one day as I was going through the line at the supermarket I noticed that a tabloid (and no I would never pay for a tabloid) announced loudly that Julia was childless and really wanted to have a baby. Well! Since I had seen her in that Los Angeles airport I felt very connected, and so I prayed for her to have twins; and despite the fact that I payed almost no attention to tabloids while I was in the checkout line at the supermarket (specifically at Food Lion) and even avoided looking at girls in bikinis while in the checkout line (as if my mother were there with me telling me not to look as she used to do). I prayed for my Julia to have twins, and you know what? YOU KNOW WHAT? One day as I was going through the checkout and trying to avoid looking at bikinis you know what happened? Yes. I found out the my Julia was having twins! And thus I feel that I am like her father figure. She is my Julia though she does not know me, and I am thankful for her twins. True story.
 

Brickjectivity

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
He's goin' full trottle.
I don't mean to imply that I am uniquely pure or have never looked at naked women. Its just that when I'm in line at checkout it feels like mom is watching me.

@Sunstone @Wirey I would not mind hearing from you two porn experts who probably hate Julia Roberts and love tabloids.
 

Cacotopia

Let's go full Trottle
Shoutout to the Water Champ Tom Segura and the Sip Champ Chrisznitches Pazistky

Keep those jeans high and tight.

 

Brickjectivity

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
Shoutout to the Water Champ Tom Segura and the Sip Champ Chrisznitches Pazistky

Keep those jeans high and tight.

I respect that, and I respect him for building his own house. I don't get the goatee or all the ceiling fans, but hey. Maybe he is trying to save energy? I don't judge who Julia chooses for a boyfriend, because I am a good father figure. I don't even judge her own father, nor do I inquire into her family. That's her business. I also don't question her career choices or try to 'Hack' information about her. Everything I know I have acquired accidentally, through the tabloids (which I don't try to read) in the supermarket isle (as if my own mother were watching). She is simply God's gift to me, which I have neither labored for nor deserve. Its true I may be younger than her, but you know what I could still be her father.
 

BSM1

What? Me worry?
This is a true story about why I feel like I am Julia Robert's father. I know it sounds weird but when I was about seventeen I had to fly out to Los Angeles, and when I landed I swear I saw Julia in the airport waiting for a plane. (I call her 'My Julia'.) Now, as a superstar she probably hates being in the tabloids, but it was the tabloids which complicated my connection with her. You see I am not a famous actor as some of you seem to suspect but a typical American with no ties to the film industry, and one day as I was going through the line at the supermarket I noticed that a tabloid (and no I would never pay for a tabloid) announced loudly that Julia was childless and really wanted to have a baby. Well! Since I had seen her in that Los Angeles airport I felt very connected, and so I prayed for her to have twins; and despite the fact that I payed almost no attention to tabloids while I was in the checkout line at the supermarket (specifically at Food Lion) and even avoided looking at girls in bikinis while in the checkout line (as if my mother were there with me telling me not to look as she used to do). I prayed for my Julia to have twins, and you know what? YOU KNOW WHAT? One day as I was going through the checkout and trying to avoid looking at bikinis you know what happened? Yes. I found out the my Julia was having twins! And thus I feel that I am like her father figure. She is my Julia though she does not know me, and I am thankful for her twins. True story.

Not to derail your post, but one of the coolest tabloid (which..ermm..I never read either) headlines I ever saw was years ago. It was just a couple of months after Rock Hudson had died of AIDS. The headline read, "Rock Hudson goes straight in the afterlife...". True story.
 

YmirGF

Bodhisattva in Recovery
This is a true story about why I feel like I am Julia Robert's father. I know it sounds weird but when I was about seventeen I had to fly out to Los Angeles, and when I landed I swear I saw Julia in the airport waiting for a plane. (I call her 'My Julia'.) Now, as a superstar she probably hates being in the tabloids, but it was the tabloids which complicated my connection with her. You see I am not a famous actor as some of you seem to suspect but a typical American with no ties to the film industry, and one day as I was going through the line at the supermarket I noticed that a tabloid (and no I would never pay for a tabloid) announced loudly that Julia was childless and really wanted to have a baby. Well! Since I had seen her in that Los Angeles airport I felt very connected, and so I prayed for her to have twins; and despite the fact that I payed almost no attention to tabloids while I was in the checkout line at the supermarket (specifically at Food Lion) and even avoided looking at girls in bikinis while in the checkout line (as if my mother were there with me telling me not to look as she used to do). I prayed for my Julia to have twins, and you know what? YOU KNOW WHAT? One day as I was going through the checkout and trying to avoid looking at bikinis you know what happened? Yes. I found out the my Julia was having twins! And thus I feel that I am like her father figure. She is my Julia though she does not know me, and I am thankful for her twins. True story.
Praise Jesus!
 

Brickjectivity

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
Not to derail your post, but one of the coolest tabloid (which..ermm..I never read either) headlines I ever saw was years ago. It was just a couple of months after Rock Hudson had died of AIDS. The headline read, "Rock Hudson goes straight in the afterlife...". True story.
Wow! I duly respect your extreme discipline! You are THE MAN. I am going to google who Rock Hudson is. We should be friends if we aren't already. You could be my Julia's godfather. I invite you.
 

YmirGF

Bodhisattva in Recovery
Wow! I duly respect your extreme discipline! You are THE MAN. I am going to google who Rock Hudson is. We should be friends if we aren't already. You could be my Julia's godfather. I invite you.
This fits so well an idea I'm talking to a friend about lately. We call it "fluid families" (stealing from fluid gender).
 

BSM1

What? Me worry?
Wow! I duly respect your extreme discipline! You are THE MAN. I am going to google who Rock Hudson is. We should be friends if we aren't already. You could be my Julia's godfather. I invite you.

Dude! I feel both honored and old at the same time. Who's Rock Hudson???
 

Sunstone

De Diablo Del Fora
Premium Member
@Sunstone @Wirey I would not mind hearing from you two porn experts who probably hate Julia Roberts and love tabloids.

I'm not at all well informed about Hollywood people, Brick. I had to google Julia Roberts just now to know who she was. Can't say I know enough about her to have an opinion of her, much less hate her. She looks nice enough, though.

As for porn, my tastes in porn were formed in the 1970s. I'm way out of date, and most of today's stuff is too extreme for me.

Back in the day, I used to go to erotic dance clubs, but I don't regard erotic dance as porn.

I never read tabloids, except sometimes for the headlines when I'm bored in the check-out aisle. Aren't they mostly about Hollywood people and losing weight?

I don't think I can be of much help to you this time around.
 

Cacotopia

Let's go full Trottle
I respect that, and I respect him for building his own house. I don't get the goatee or all the ceiling fans, but hey. Maybe he is trying to save energy? I don't judge who Julia chooses for a boyfriend, because I am a good father figure. I don't even judge her own father, nor do I inquire into her family. That's her business. I also don't question her career choices or try to 'Hack' information about her. Everything I know I have acquired accidentally, through the tabloids (which I don't try to read) in the supermarket isle (as if my own mother were watching). She is simply God's gift to me, which I have neither labored for nor deserve. Its true I may be younger than her, but you know what I could still be her father.
That's exactly what Christina P and Tom said about him on YMH.

WHY are their so many ceiling fans!?!
 

Brickjectivity

Veteran Member
Staff member
Premium Member
I'm not at all well informed about Hollywood people, Brick. I had to google Julia Roberts just now to know who she was. Can't say I know enough about her to have an opinion of her, much less hate her. She looks nice enough, though.

As for porn, my tastes in porn were formed in the 1970s. I'm way out of date, and most of today's stuff is too extreme for me.

Back in the day, I used to go to erotic dance clubs, but I don't regard erotic dance as porn.

I never read tabloids, except sometimes for the headlines when I'm bored in the check-out aisle. Aren't they mostly about Hollywood people and losing weight?

I don't think I can be of much help to you this time around.
Yeah I don't understand how tabloids can make money. They basically are check out aisle trash.
 

Wirey

Fartist
I don't mean to imply that I am uniquely pure or have never looked at naked women. Its just that when I'm in line at checkout it feels like mom is watching me.

@Sunstone @Wirey I would not mind hearing from you two porn experts who probably hate Julia Roberts and love tabloids.

I wouldn’t touch Julia Roberts with someone else’s hand. That said, we share a birthday.
 
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