"I love you but I don't like you."

[Rachel Rugelach]

If you have ever been part of a military unit or a sports team… then you might understand how one might develop some measure of trust, love and respect for certain individuals you might not particularly “like”.

This sort of answers Stephen King's statement: "Love without liking is like a chain with a manacle at each end." I can see this kind of love you describe existing as the chain between the manacle on the arm of the individual, and the manacle on the arm of the group. Especially when the group does something horribly wrong, as when a group of soldiers commit a war crime, or when a group of police abuse their power. The individual who is part of the group may not speak out against his mates, whether he likes them or not, due to the bond between them.

 

[osgart]

Yes, I also care for people whom I don't love, regardless of whether they are likable or not. Caring for the welfare of others is basic humanity. I would not even have an imprisoned criminal tortured by others if I could prevent it.

But the question was: Is loving without liking like "a chain with a manacle at each end"?

I don't think it is such a thing unless you make it such a thing. Ultimately everyone is responsible for themselves. Caring and loving are not without pain, but it's well worth the journey despite that. The alternatives are worse. I think caring without liking somebody is freer than the alternatives.

 

[Twilight Hue]

"I love you but I don't like you." Can one really love another person without actually liking that person?

Author Stephen King wrote: "Love without liking is like a chain with a manacle at each end." That line comes from a character whom King has stated is his favorite character out of all the characters he has ever created in his stories: Holly Gibney. In this particular story (and King has written several stories featuring this character), Holly is referring to the relationship she has with her domineering mother who has contributed to Holly's mental illness.

I can imagine someone feeling that he/she loves another person that he/she doesn't necessarily like, perhaps out of a sense of family obligation -- somebody that you wouldn't have chosen to associate with if not for the fact that you are linked to that person through family. Is that the chain and the manacles? Is it entirely due to emotional imprisonment that makes one believe that one loves without liking? And is that really "love"?

Did Stephen King get it right? Or is there more to it?

I'd go the opposite.
I can like a person but not love them.

 

[Rachel Rugelach]

I'd go the opposite.
I can like a person but not love them.

I'm on board with that. There are a lot of people I like (most people I meet, in fact), but I reserve "love" for much closer relationships.