I probably won't find a religion

[Breathe]

After much time searching, I don't think I'll find a religion. At least, not in the foreseeable future.

I gave up trying to find ages ago. Now, though, I don't think I'll get one even if I let it come on its own. The more I think about it, the more I realise I'm awkward, defiant and a special snowflake. I don't appear fit into a faith, and I doubt that I could fit into one, anyway.

I know what I believe and it's been standard for a long time. I have mixed feelings about the fact I know, deep down, that it will be difficult for me to follow one.

On one hand, I have only myself. I have no priests, no community and I can do my own thing. I can do whichever practises I like, believe what I like, do what I like (within reason).

On the other, the same is also a downfall. I would love to have a faith of my own. I would love to have the spiritual community both online and off.

I also have no religious scripture, holidays, clothing, language, places to worship nor congregate. I can look at them all, adopt them, even love them, but they are not mine; I'm an outsider to them. We have no attachment to each other. They do not make it to be part of me: they'd just be garments to wear, alter, and discard as I see fit.

My beliefs have no history. No future. Just me. Short of something life-changing, I will be walking across wild terrain. I won't bother making a path because nobody will follow it.

I'd compare myself like an ascetic travelling through the forests, but that'd be wrong. An ascetic gives it up to go it alone by choice. I'm closer to a benign wildman. Sometimes I steal food and clothes to get by or come to trade and then I go back to my forest alone. I could, most likely, survive in one of the villages (faiths), but I'd no longer be 'me'. I'd have to change who I am, what I do, what I think.

And yet, the journey feels like it will be a bit lonely.


Suggestions?

 

[Brickjectivity]

I gave up trying to find ages ago.

I notice you have over 17000 messages posted. Are you still a seeker?

And yet, the journey feels like it will be a bit lonely.
Suggestions?

There are web sites meant to help people meet people with common interests such as sports, hiking, volunteering etc. You can lock into a community by volunteering regularly somewhere. There are also fraternal organizations that you can join. What about joining a club? There are many kinds: card playing, astronomy, games, films, knitting, drinking, eating, touring etc.

Quakers and Universalists would probably have you without too many modifications. I'm sure there are some other religious or quasi-religious groups that would.

 

[Breathe]

Hi @Brickjectivity - Yes, I still consider myself to be a seeker, of sorts.

I am (well, was, currently in recovery from medical illness) a big part of the local community and have volunteered my skills a lot: teaching non-natives English, teaching literacy to vulnerable people, IT to the elderly, and so on. We have many clubs locally but none of them.

The difference between the organizations and clubs is that I don't feel they have anything to offer me in the way of spiritual community. I would consider Freemasons or whatever, but I'm wary about giving organizations my money.

I don't think we have any Universalists here and I don't have an interest in them. I don't want to join a tea-and-biscuits club of Middle Class, middle-aged white people who're afraid of "the G word" don't think we have a big presence of UUs here in the UK anyway.

I'm slightly apathetic to Quaker groups even though I like them, so I will consider them.

But none of these give me spiritual community.

Which are the religious or quasi-religious groups you have in mind?

 

[Akivah]

On one hand, you sound like a perfect fit for the atheist "religion". They also have no priests, no community, and do their own thing.

On the other hand, if you really want religious holidays and buildings, just show up. Find one that's close to where you live or where you're friendly with the people and just show up. AFAIK, no one ever gets carded at the door. And no one (except a cult) tracks what you do on your own time. You don't have to worry about someone following your beliefs, just show up for the events.

I have attended Chinese festivals without being Chinese and Greek Orthodox festivals without being Greek Orthodox. It really isn't hard to just show up and interact.

 

[Brickjectivity]

I don't know. You're in the UK, and I'm in the USA; plus I don't know what you are like in person. A 'Religious community' like you're talking about requires a lot of personal dedication. You give up a lot of things to join something like that, and the community cannot replace what you give up. I can tell you in my opinion it is not an equal exchange. If you find a religious community to join you should realize that it is for the purpose of aggregating your efforts with others. Anything else is just a rip-off scheme. The more they hug you and pepper you with fake attention, the more suspect you should be. People will tell you that you feel like family, but most of them will only be fooling themselves. Whatever defects you have will affect you when you join a religious community. For example if you, like me, are terribly good looking, then that will continue to affect you! People will make many assumptions based on how you look and how well you speak. If you are successful people will like you, but if you are poor you will struggle. It doesn't matter that the people are religious, because they will still be people. There will probably be a pecking order, too. The only difference is that a religious community works together towards common goals. You have to believe in those goals and in how they go about achieving them.

 

[Jainarayan]

I can relate to what @Brickjectivity said about getting sucked in with the kissie-kissie-huggy-huggy business. That sort of thing happened to me in the Eastern Orthodox parish I belonged to. It was like "oooh! fresh meat!" I worked 2nd shift, and as just about the only male who had his days free, the rector began to take advantage of that. A phone call here, a phone call then, a phone call "we need to..." (who is this "we" you speak of?). Yet because I am not of Slavic or Greek descent, I don't think I was ever really accepted, just tolerated. I drifted away after being a parishioner for 10 years, with nary a notice. Membership doesn't always have its privileges. Looking back to when I attended the Hindu temple I see that I was something of a curiosity. In retrospect I wouldn't expect that from people who are well-educated, well-dressed, and with good jobs and families. As much as I would like to meet others who are Ásatrúar, I am wary of joining a community of any kind. Of course, that's just me.

 

[George-ananda]

Suggestions?

Sounds like you want to be a 'loaner' and part of a group at the same time so it doesn't work. My suggestion is you either tell yourself you prefer to be a 'loaner' in your spirituality and train your thinking to be CONTENT with that OR find a religious group in your area that bests approximates your beliefs and join the group and become CONTENT as a member knowing nothing is perfect.

The key is finding a place to rest in contentment.

 

[Desert Snake]

@OP
On the bright side, you won't have to tithe.

 

[wintersolstice]

After much time searching, I don't think I'll find a religion. At least, not in the foreseeable future.

I gave up trying to find ages ago. Now, though, I don't think I'll get one even if I let it come on its own. The more I think about it, the more I realise I'm awkward, defiant and a special snowflake. I don't appear fit into a faith, and I doubt that I could fit into one, anyway.

I know what I believe and it's been standard for a long time. I have mixed feelings about the fact I know, deep down, that it will be difficult for me to follow one.

On one hand, I have only myself. I have no priests, no community and I can do my own thing. I can do whichever practises I like, believe what I like, do what I like (within reason).

On the other, the same is also a downfall. I would love to have a faith of my own. I would love to have the spiritual community both online and off.

I also have no religious scripture, holidays, clothing, language, places to worship nor congregate. I can look at them all, adopt them, even love them, but they are not mine; I'm an outsider to them. We have no attachment to each other. They do not make it to be part of me: they'd just be garments to wear, alter, and discard as I see fit.

My beliefs have no history. No future. Just me. Short of something life-changing, I will be walking across wild terrain. I won't bother making a path because nobody will follow it.

I'd compare myself like an ascetic travelling through the forests, but that'd be wrong. An ascetic gives it up to go it alone by choice. I'm closer to a benign wildman. Sometimes I steal food and clothes to get by or come to trade and then I go back to my forest alone. I could, most likely, survive in one of the villages (faiths), but I'd no longer be 'me'. I'd have to change who I am, what I do, what I think.

And yet, the journey feels like it will be a bit lonely.


Suggestions?

How's it working for you?

 

[Twilight Hue]

After much time searching, I don't think I'll find a religion. At least, not in the foreseeable future.

I gave up trying to find ages ago. Now, though, I don't think I'll get one even if I let it come on its own. The more I think about it, the more I realise I'm awkward, defiant and a special snowflake. I don't appear fit into a faith, and I doubt that I could fit into one, anyway.

I know what I believe and it's been standard for a long time. I have mixed feelings about the fact I know, deep down, that it will be difficult for me to follow one.

On one hand, I have only myself. I have no priests, no community and I can do my own thing. I can do whichever practises I like, believe what I like, do what I like (within reason).

On the other, the same is also a downfall. I would love to have a faith of my own. I would love to have the spiritual community both online and off.

I also have no religious scripture, holidays, clothing, language, places to worship nor congregate. I can look at them all, adopt them, even love them, but they are not mine; I'm an outsider to them. We have no attachment to each other. They do not make it to be part of me: they'd just be garments to wear, alter, and discard as I see fit.

My beliefs have no history. No future. Just me. Short of something life-changing, I will be walking across wild terrain. I won't bother making a path because nobody will follow it.

I'd compare myself like an ascetic travelling through the forests, but that'd be wrong. An ascetic gives it up to go it alone by choice. I'm closer to a benign wildman. Sometimes I steal food and clothes to get by or come to trade and then I go back to my forest alone. I could, most likely, survive in one of the villages (faiths), but I'd no longer be 'me'. I'd have to change who I am, what I do, what I think.

And yet, the journey feels like it will be a bit lonely.


Suggestions?

Shoot the bull with folks. Like here. ;0]

 

[Toxikmynd]

I'm on the same boat, I was following Asatru and it still says I do, but I've drifted because I want a community, yet Chrstianity, Islam, Himduism, Buddhism, don't make a lot of religious/spiritual sense to me anymore either, but I'm not atheist because I can't fathom everything around me without some higher being controlling it, call me primitive if you will.

 

[ShivaFan]

You should join the Hare Krishnas. They are exactly the opposite of everything you see yourself as in your own box and a loner. The reason you never found anything, probably, is because what you really want isn't what you are "in spirit" right now, and in fact what you really want is an immersion experience with a lot of heart throbs of non-boring love gushes and to wear a "uniform" that makes you aftually stand out as a bit different from your average boob tube zombie.

What you want is authoritarian love.

Just my gut.

I know ... you are going to say you already went to the Hare Krishna temple and you didn't fi in. But if that is true, I wager you only went once and was, frankly, terrified. Because you are sort of a scaredy-cat actually, I bet. So just free yourself and dance a little.

yeah ... they prubably are perfect for you.

Bring about $5 bucks for a donation. Buy something from them, too. Have fun.

So, just my thoughts.

 

[Toxikmynd]

You should join the Hare Krishnas. They are exactly the opposite of everything you see yourself as in your own box and a loner. The reason you never found anything, probably, is because what you really want isn't what you are "in spirit" right now, and in fact what you really want is an immersion experience with a lot of heart throbs of non-boring love gushes and to wear a "uniform" that makes you aftually stand out as a bit different from your average boob tube zombie.

What you want is authoritarian love.

Just my gut.

I know ... you are going to say you already went to the Hare Krishna temple and you didn't fi in. But if that is true, I wager you only went once and was, frankly, terrified. Because you are sort of a scaredy-cat actually, I bet. So just free yourself and dance a little.

yeah ... they prubably are perfect for you.

Bring about $5 bucks for a donation. Buy something from them, too. Have fun.

So, just my thoughts.

Are you the true kind of Hare Krishna? Or the American version?

 

[ShivaFan]

I am neither. I am a Saiva.

 

[Breathe]

I can relate to what @Brickjectivity said about getting sucked in with the kissie-kissie-huggy-huggy business. That sort of thing happened to me in the Eastern Orthodox parish I belonged to. <<snip>>

As much as I would like to meet others who are Ásatrúar, I am wary of joining a community of any kind. Of course, that's just me.

I know entirely where you're coming from. I think it's like that with me. I used to visit the church with my wife every now-and-then, but I was open about the fact my beliefs were... meh. They still tried to get me to do stuff.

How's it working for you?

Not too bad, actually. Sometimes I wish I had a few companions, though, but it's not... y'know?

I feel I'm probably suited for the life as the wildman. I don't think I can fit in, and I'm just gonna have to accept that and go from wildman to a wandering ascetic, I guess.

You should join the Hare Krishnas. <<snip>>

I have no interest in, nor love, for the HK path, unfortunately.

 

[YmirGF]

And yet, the journey feels like it will be a bit lonely.

Suggestions?

Get used to it.

 

[YmirGF]

I don't know what else to say than what I did above except you will find comfort and solace in the most unexpected places along the way. It's really a thrilling ride. I hope it never ends...

 

[Tumah]

That's ok, we won't force you!
Pave your own path!
Fight the flow!

 

[Deidre]

No one needs religion. I used to think I did, but I don't. I believe in a god, but not religion. It's unfortunate that we feel lonely and saddened when we feel like we can't 'fit' into a particular 'religion.'

 

[DawudTalut]

.....


Suggestions?

Peace be on you.
Cordial welcome to important question of seekers:
http://www.alislam.org/library/books/Philosophy-of-Teachings-of-Islam.pdf
wwwDOTalislamDOTorg/library/books/Philosophy-of-Teachings-of-Islam.pdf