Milton Platt
Well-Known Member
Finally realizing that there most likely are no gods and certainly no gods thus far described to me.
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If You Were Asked to Write a Spiritual Autobiography of Your Life...
- Thread starter Sunstone
- Start date
Finally realizing that there most likely are no gods and certainly no gods thus far described to me.
So far I have not discovered a definition that works for me besides the more layperson 'in good spirits,' finding peaceful and mindful places and mindsets to be in.
Confusing as H@#! and probably quite boring.
I must protest! From what you've told me, yours is anything but boring!
sealchan
Well-Known Member
The dream I had which convinced me that I was a believer rather than an atheist.
^This.
Geoff-Allen
Resident megalomaniac
I have been fortunate to have many mystical experiences.
I used to be a very angry & cynical atheist so I was delighted and mystified when it first happened to me - I figured I would be the VERY last person on this planet to have a "religious experience"!
The first one happened when I was on a psych ward. It was an altered state of consciousness that I still struggle to put into words - I have written a few poems about it.
I felt totally euphoric and had little need for sleep or food. I felt a "peace that surpasses understanding".
Foolishly I assumed it would never end!
May share more if I dredge up my old writings & poems.
That experience led me to be very interested in meditation which I never would have considered previously! I thought it was just "making your mind go blank" and wondered why-on-earth anyone would bother ...
I am definitely FAR more patient and kind and compassionate as a result of my experiences and meditation so it has been a very pleasant surprise from how I used to think & act
All the best!
To quote Carole King:
My life has been a tapestry
Of rich and royal hue;
An everlasting vision
Of the ever-changing view;
Few of the individual events would make any sense without the warp and woof of the others. Some might seem more important because they happened before others, but later ones might be more important because they developed meaning from the prior experiences...
One of the early ones that might be one of the more significant: I awoke one morning, a few days before my 12th birthday. Seemed like a normal day, but I felt a little off, a little nauseous. I mentioned it to my folks and headed off to school, where I had crossing guard duty, assisting the lady who handled the job of stopping traffic so kids could cross the busy highway between our house and the school.
Throughout the morning, I felt worse and worse. I went home for lunch (two long blocks...I had a Schwinn Stingray that made it a short jaunt...and yes, in 1970, kids could go home for lunch unattended...). I felt so bad, I called my dad at his work (He taught at a high school in town). Amazingly, the office was able to get a hold of him, and I told him I felt sick and asked what I should do: stay home or go back to school. He left it to my discretion. I decided to chance it...worst situation, I would get sick at school and have to go home.
So, without having eaten anything for lunch, I headed back to school. Very shortly, the feeling of nausea went away, and the day went by as normal.
School ended, and I went out to crossing guard duty again. The last thing I remember before blacking out was hearing a roaring sound, screaming children, and trying to push back against a early 50's Plymouth. I awoke to the sound of myself yelling for help, from underneath the car.
Fourteen children, including myself, were injured, one fatally. I was the second most severely hurt: separated collarbone, broken leg...my dad says I had a concussion, but I don't recall that as being part of the problem. No internal injuries.
I had a choice: I chose, and had to live with the consequences. Had I chosen differently, my life would have been different, and perhaps others' lives would have been markedly different (after all, one of my classmates would have been on guard duty in my stead...)
By itself, it means little; but as a part of the sum of my experiences, it holds meaning.
You can borrow some of mine if you like - but not the best bits.
I'm sure you do have much that is important - it just might not seem it at the time.
ThePainefulTruth
Romantic-Cynic
As a late-teen, I had some long conversations with an atheist. He (or atheism) couldn't argue very well for their viewpoint, but I looked around and finally left Christianity for the only other reasonable position I could find, deism.
Twenty years later, my belief in deism coalesced into something more focused and definitive in what can only be described as an epiphany: The only reason God would be hands off is because the whole purpose of the universe if to inculcate our free will. And hands off can only be absolute: no prophesy, no fate, no Kismet, no meant to be and no divine providence...ever.
But hands-off is pretty close to no God.
I can leave the question not asked, since it makes no difference to me either way.
I met this Jewish bloke online and he laughed at some of my Christian arguments to another person, which made me question that maybe they were laughable and after a while I left Christianity never to return.
It wasn't quite as simple as that but you know.
It wasn't quite as simple as that but you know.
ThePainefulTruth
Romantic-Cynic
But hands-off is pretty close to no God.
In this life, exactly. We can't t tell the difference, by deisgn (if God exists). The ultimate act of divine laissez-faire is for God to make Itself unknowable, by there being zero evidence for or against It's existence. Any such awareness of God (if It exists), is located "before" the Big Bang or "outside" of the universe, which is the firewall between God (if It exists) and this rational, natural universe. Thus and so, God (if It exists) created the universe for that one purpose, in order to enable our free will. That enormous feat and gift indicates the singular importance of free will. An omnipotent God (if It exists) could do anything else instantly.
Well I tend to agree that we have free will - plenty are intent on proving otherwise - as ordained.
First I was guided by Buddha into the impermanence of all things and the arts of meditation. Quite literally. The image of Buddha emerged in my minds eye and the basic insights of the eightfold path (I did not know the name then) just blossomed in me over a period of time (several months to an year). It was like live mental instruction as I was told to watch the flow of life around and to watch myself and others react to it in various ways.
Then one day during my concentrated absorption into the inner and the outer worlds of phenomena, the reality became transparent and broke into dynamic swirling weaves of mathematical patterns. But this reality itself was simply the shimmering "skin" of an immense brilliantly shining entity, throbbing with power, awareness and creative virility. Overlaid on it was all the worlds and all the times and all that was or could be..and all beings were one with it...each were like small spasms of concentrated light traveling through its body. In a sense, the experience is timeless, its like experiencing the I, one never stops being aware of it just like the sense of "I" in consciousness. I also realized that the purpose of my life has been achieved. There was nothing else I needed to do. (My age 9-11 at that time)
The insights changed me. I relaxed into life and living, and less perturbed by its many ups and downs. My concentration and reading powers increased rapidly. I also realized that mathematics is somehow connected to the fabric and structure of reality, and that increased my interest in maths and science..which suddenly seemed very easy whereas earlier it was hard and confusing. There was also an increased interest in language and vocabulary growth as I needed to articulate to myself what is it that I experienced and to grasp with explicitly along with the intuitive understanding I had received. It was (is) a very dense experience that I have mined ever since in many fruitful ways. My parents (Indian, you get the picture) were overjoyed at my sudden studious brilliance and my teenage years were a breeze.
Yet there remained the dilemma of why do anything at all? What else to do when culmination has been achieved. It was difficult to connect with all the huffing and puffing going around me and when the standard motivations (marks, success, fame etc.) were not that attractive. Then Krishna and Saraswati appeared in my mind (yeah, I know, everybody is lining up to talk to me
) and showed me the world darkened and sickened in the fumes of pollution and deforestation and told me to use whatever gifts I had to purify it, and to make the knowledge of science, the gift of the white goddess into a sacred calling rather than a means of short sighted exploitation. Then Krishna took up his huge conch and gave a deafening blow, and my meditation broke with the ears ringing with its echo. (I was around 16 at this time).So that's what I have been doing after that.
ThePainefulTruth
Romantic-Cynic
Well I tend to agree that we have free will - plenty are intent on proving otherwise - as ordained.
What evidence is there that we don't have free will?