Well, I didn't actually marry my right hand, but I think I've come darn close to your ideal.
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Is it Possible to Love without Jealousy, Possessiveness, Suspicion, Fear, etc?
- Thread starter Sunstone
- Start date
Well, I didn't actually marry my right hand, but I think I've come darn close to your ideal.
Kilgore Trout
Misanthropic Humanist
I suggest you get a ring on that finger, stat. A partner like that comes along once in a lifetime. Make sure you put lotion and kleenex on your wedding registry.
Caladan
Agnostic Pantheist
A generic nod to the range of strong emotions healthy human beings experience during the course of their lives.
I believe many relationships think of marriage as ownership. Think about it, men tend to control deeds and titles to what they own and can access them at any given moment knowing exactly where they are. Who keeps the marriage license in a relationship?
I believe jealousy and possesiveness is a sign of insecurity. Myself, I don't worry about such things, it's silly. Control is another issue however. My wife did not want me to retire. I don't control her career or where she travels to with her job. After all these years it was a bump in the road. She has yet to come and see the retirement home I am building. She had a cow when I sold my cattle but chilled when the money went into OUR account.
We agree on most everything but retirement is not one of them. We could not be futher apart because she is too young to retire and is really involved with her career. I'm fine with what she decides for herself, but she is resistant to make it a two way street.
Our age difference was never an issue until now.
I believe jealousy and possesiveness is a sign of insecurity. Myself, I don't worry about such things, it's silly. Control is another issue however. My wife did not want me to retire. I don't control her career or where she travels to with her job. After all these years it was a bump in the road. She has yet to come and see the retirement home I am building. She had a cow when I sold my cattle but chilled when the money went into OUR account.
We agree on most everything but retirement is not one of them. We could not be futher apart because she is too young to retire and is really involved with her career. I'm fine with what she decides for herself, but she is resistant to make it a two way street.
Our age difference was never an issue until now.
I hope you didn't sell that one too!
"Aravis also had many quarrels (and, I'm afraid, even fights) with Cor, but they always made it up again: so that years later, when they were grown up, they were so used to quarrelling and making it up again that they got married so as to go on doing it more conveniently."
- C. S. Lews' The Horse and his Boy
- C. S. Lews' The Horse and his Boy
LOL, she said, "Rick where are the cows?" I told her I was no longer interested in tending to them. It's not like she ever fed them in Winter. It was totally my decision just like if she chooses to change jobs or quit all together. It is her call to make.
She loves our home and will never move most likely. All her stuff would never fit in the cottage I have built. There is a walkin closet I keep empty just in case.
I kind of like the arrangement however. She runs the home to the very last detail and everything is so so. I have my off grid man cave. She travels during the week and I come home when she returns. The house looks exactly like she left it. She does like that and I don't have to worry about any issues in that reguard. I'm at home as much as she is.
Yes! I trust it is impossible to love with jealousy. When we experience jealousy with our loved one we are not 'in love'. We have stepped out for a stint with perception. Jealousy is fear. Trust is the active ingredient in love, true love. And love is not a possession. Love is not something you can have. It is intangeable. Love is like breathing, it is the perpetual process of regenerative trust. And love is not dependant nor conditional. Love is life. Love is truth. All else is missing the mark. 
I suppose that's technically likely to be correct, Dan, in the sense that a healthy person is likely to at one point or another in their lifetime have experienced every human emotion. Very lawyerly.
I'll leave you to your "healthy" life of suspicion, possessiveness, fear, jealousy, and so forth. Sounds wonderful.
For others, I guess. Not me. I'm extremely jealous and possessive.
Yes! I trust it is impossible to love with jealousy. When we experience jealousy with our loved one we are not 'in love'. We have stepped out for a stint with perception. Jealousy is fear. Trust is the active ingredient in love, true love. And love is not a possession. Love is not something you can have. It is intangeable. Love is like breathing, it is the perpetual process of regenerative trust. And love is not dependant nor conditional. Love is life. Love is truth. All else is missing the mark.
Welcome to the forum!
What does that do to you or for you, if anything?
It's not fun. But a part of me enjoys it.
Clearly, you & I will not be dating....even if Mrs Revolt gave me persmission.
I'm not an easy person to date, admittedly. But neither are the people I've been involved with. That's part of the reason why I'm alone.
So SF, tell me if you wish to what kind of person would be the perfect match for you?
I could enjoy a person like that also. We have something in common.A vampiric goth Dominatrix. LOL.
I could enjoy a person like that also. We have something in common.
Wow, Rick. That was unexpected. Awesome.
Caladan
Agnostic Pantheist
I think it is the other way around since I am not the one who implies that this is what being in a loving relationship entail. I am just trying to make you guys feel better. And since no guru hodgepodge can redeem pathological patterns I am simply offering a more sober approach: Understand human emotions.