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Is it Wise to Marry Exclusively or Predominantly for Love?

Akivah

Well-Known Member
I was fairly recently asked by my 16 year old grandson what really being in love is like, and here's how I answered him (see if you agree): That you love her so much that you want to be "into her" (not sexually) whereas you can't wait to be with her again, even if just to talk with her, and that you would be willing to die to protect her. Then you know you're truly in love.

That's good.

Yesterday night my wife had to go to the hospital. She had vomited for two hours straight and had severe stomach cramps. I drove her to the hospital at midnight, stayed by her side, and drove her home at 4 in the morning. I texted my workplace that I wasn't coming in today. I cleaned up her puke, rushed to provide her needs, and took care of her as best I could. I was just happy she made it through and had no thought to anything else. That's another facet of love.
 

Wherenextcolumbus

Well-Known Member
Sorry but you don't know me.
I know. But your advice is actually unrealistic and dangerous. If my partner punched me in the face, to say it wouldn't hurt me physically and emotionally unless I allow it to and I should continue to love my partner regardless or I wouldn't be loving myself, doesn't make any sense what so ever. How would that be loving MYSELF!?
 

metis

aged ecumenical anthropologist
That's good.

Yesterday night my wife had to go to the hospital. She had vomited for two hours straight and had severe stomach cramps. I drove her to the hospital at midnight, stayed by her side, and drove her home at 4 in the morning. I texted my workplace that I wasn't coming in today. I cleaned up her puke, rushed to provide her needs, and took care of her as best I could. I was just happy she made it through and had no thought to anything else. That's another facet of love.
Well said, and I hope she's doing much better. My son and his wife went through the same thing a few weeks ago whereas they couldn't figure out whether to sit or stick their head in the pot because it was coming out both ends express style.
 

BSM1

What? Me worry?
I know. But your advice is actually unrealistic and dangerous. If my partner punched me in the face, to say it wouldn't hurt me physically and emotionally unless I allow it to and I should continue to love my partner regardless or I wouldn't be loving myself, doesn't make any sense what so ever. How would that be loving MYSELF!?

You've totally missed the point. Have a nice day.
 

MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
It's wise to marry for love when the love present isn't the mysterious, who-is-this-godlike-creature infatuation, but the consummating love of mutually shared dynamic magnetism between the best of friends.

That deep and abiding friendship carries the marriage through even the most complex and seemingly irreconcilable conflicts.
 

RedDragon94

Love everyone, meditate often
Is it wise to marry exclusively or even predominantly for love? Why or why not?
How about compatible life goals, values, talents, and interests, to name a few things?
(Sorry, pressed the wrong button there :)) See, this makes me wonder, when do we know we are in love? Is it simply the attraction to another person or is it deeper than that?

If we know we are in love then we should act upon it by pursuing a relationship. I don't see any other reason why two people should get married. The other stuff is side show attraction.
 

Maponos

Welcome to the Opera
I want to say exclusively for love, because I'm a die-hard romantic, but I know that's not entirely feasible. For there to be a good marriage, there needs to be some kind of financial stability.
 

psychoslice

Veteran Member
I myself have never been married, I cannot ever seeing myself loving just one person for the rest of my life, I love many people and not in degrees, love is love, it can never be measured.
 
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